What Is Even Happening In The NFL!?

Did someone spike the waters of 32 separate NFL headquarters?

Free Agency is open, and that should have provided enough boardroom madness for most teams on its own, but we’ve also seen a bunch of wild trades sweeping through headlines and twitter feeds alike. Huge names getting flipped.

Like, where do we even start? Ooh, how about here:

Flee Like An Eagle

Last week we saw LeSean McCoy traded out of nowhere. Turns out that was just the beginning. The Eagles were straight back into the steaming volcano of NFL trades, this time swapping quarterback Nick Foles for the Rams’ Sam Bradford. The same Sam Bradford that missed the entire 2014 season with injury which was probably the only reason he was still on that team to begin with. There were draft picks involved to balance things out, but this was still mental. Foles has been largely great for the Eagles, especially in the aftermath of stealing the starter’s job from Mike Vick in 2013. Last year was blighted by a shoulder injury, and this sudden shipping out must have caught most by surprise.

Sam Bradford may or may not be the starting QB for the Eagles, who also re-signed Mark Sanchez. The word is that they’re planning on trading up in the draft to nab Oregon starter Marcus Mariota, yet another Oregon player linked with Chip Kelly, former coach of said academic institution. It’s a crazy amount of license that Kelly’s getting to reshape this organisation to his fitting. Gone are the starting (and successful) QB & RB from last year. Gone is DE/LB Trent Cole after 10 seasons, he’s now a Colt. Gone is leading 2014 receiver Jeremy Maclin to the Chiefs*. Running Back Frank Gore was almost a done deal with Philly, until he got cold feet and took his talents to Indianapolis as well. That’s a blow to their plans, but RBs are easier to find in the mid-draft rounds than people realise.

*Oh, dear God did the Chiefs need that deal. Remember, they went the ENTIRE 2014 SEASON without a touchdown to a wide receiver. Something that had never happened before in the Super Bowl era.

For all those questions and holes on offence though, defensively the Eagles have done great work. Adding in former Seahawk Byron Maxwell on a six year deal, as well as Kiko Alonso, re-signing Brandon Graham… along with guys like already-contracted Malcolm Jenkins and Fletcher Cox, this should be a great unit.

Tradies

Several other trades went and dropped jaws all over NFL Nation. Jimmy Graham, tight end extraordinaire, was sent to Seattle with a fourth round 2015 pick in exchange for C Max Unger and a 2015 first-round draft pick. Uh, wow. That’s a massive weapon for Russell Wilson, who had immense trouble forcing it to his TEs in the playoffs, despite that being one of his favourite targets. Obviously the Saints are bottoming out, they’d had some drama with Graham before he eventually signed a four year extension last season and apparently they decided that it was more valuable to offer Drew Brees just a hint of protection.

The Ravens traded DT Haloti Ngata for picks to Detroit, the Lions finding as good of a replacement for Ndamukong Suh as they were likely to get at short notice. More on Suh in a bit.

Brandon Marshall’s expected trade to the Jets happened. Guts to the Bears, but they get picks. The Jets cut Percy Harvin as well. This stuff is all too much.

Shoutout to Bleacher Report for this beauty.

Freebies

Right, let’s hit free agency. Ndamukong Suh is going to the Dolphins, so there’s that. Suh is really, really, really good, so he’s getting well recompensed for having to play in Miami where the weather is wonderful, the nightlife is amazing, state income tax is a myth and the football is fair to middling. US$114m for six years, $60m of that guaranteed. This either cripples the Dolphins financially for half a decade or turns them into a very competitive side. As with all of this other stuff, it’s too soon to tell.

Elsewhere Darrelle Revis is on his way back to the Jets after a brief sojourn saw him bored in Tampa and win a Super Bowl with New England. Julius Thomas is expected to sign with Jacksonville (for some reason), a big but not unexpected blow to Denver’s offence. Denver offset that a little by adding Owen Daniels (former TE for Houston & Baltimore) and re-signing Julius’ backup Virgil Green.

Torrey Smith will be a 49er next season. The Seahawks get Cary Williams (swapsies at CB with the Eagles), A.J. Hawk’s now a Bengal, Shane Vereen a Giant and plenty other moves that, to be honest, are not about to be listed. Just go to ESPN or whatever, they’ll see ya right.

One top tier free agent remains untouched, and that’s DeMarco Murray. The Offensive Player of 2014, he deleted all references to the Cowboys on his twitter account the moment he became a freebie. Jerry Jones wants him back, but doesn’t expect him back. It’s coming down to money and the Cardinals, Jaguars, Raiders and Eagles can all offer more.

Retirees

And we must also pay tribute to a few folks who’ve had enough of the rough life. SF49ers legends Patrick Willis and Justin Smith (probably - though they’re trying to get him to reconsider) are done. A couple more stabs into the hearts of Niners fans in a week that had their GM denying reports that they were actively trying to trade Colin Kaepernick, their top four free agents (Frank Gore, Michael Crabtree, Chris Culliver and Mika Iaputi) all either signing elsewhere or expected to, and FB Bruce Miller arrested for spousal abuse (certainly not the first Niner to have a run in with the law). Hey, but they do have Jarryd Hayne.

Running Back Maurice Jones-Drew hung up the cleats this week too, he was most recently a Raider but is best known for his time with the Jaguars. The most shocking retirement was that of 26 year old Jake Locker, who simply had enough of battling the injuries that have halted his semi-promising career and he says his heart just ain’t in it any longer. Can’t blame the guy, very admirable.

Tell ya who isn’t retiring though, and that’s Peyton Manning.

Jay Cutler, King of the North

Cutty, as he should be known, has fought off the haters for another year. Okay, not exactly, but he will be the starting Chicago Bears QB in 2015, so he’s got that much going for him. Unfortunately he’s also fallen into the territory once occupied by Tony Romo, so have fun with that, Jay. At least your O-Line has your back.

Stuff That Happened in the NBA

We’ll get this one out of the way with early, Portland’s Wesley Matthews is done for the season after tearing his Achilles. Devastating blow for the team, losing possibly their best defensive player when they really looked ready for a playoff run. LaMarcus Aldridge is still playing through injury too. Ruthless news, this may cost them dearly. At least they traded for Aaron Afflalo at the deadline, so he can pick up some of the slack.

Draymond Green vs the Clippers. We need more of this in our lives. Look at those eyes, look at the pure hatred they contain.

Dahntay Jones got a $10k fine for his little bump stunt. Clips coach Doc Rivers got sarcastic on the radio about what a violent clash it was, about how hard Jones hit him. Green replied: “Cool story, Glenn”. Glenn being Doc's actual, legal first name - who knew?

Hassan Whiteside made his name as an unexpected breakout star, rebounding and blocking like a beast and giving the Miami Heat’s season a shot in the arm. He’s also getting a reputation for being a bit of a bully. Whiteside’s been ejected from two of his last five games, most recently for lashing out at Boston’s Kelly Olynyk. Not at all clever and he’ll serve a one game ban. This was a seriously brutal foul, he’s lucky to only get one game.

Apparently Jimmy Butler isn’t the most popular guy in the Chicago Bulls shoot-arounds. Not coz he’s a dick or anything, but because of his choice in music. Quote: “I get my own playlist in warmups sometimes. My teammates don’t like it very much because it’s country music, but they get over it.” Specifically, he’s quite fond of Taylor Swift’s pop-country hybrids, as evidenced by this post:

And some great news after a shocking health scare, Chris Bosh will be ready to return to the court in September and should be good to go come the start of next season. 

Mmm, that pass!

Triple Double Count

Russell Westbrook – 7

The Entire Rest of the League – 23

Peytom Branning…

<shivers…>

LeBron, No Headband

Stop Motion RussBrook

Pray 4 Rose

NBA Power Rankings:

(Last week’s rank in brackets)

1. Golden State Warriors (1)

2. Cleveland Cavaliers (4)

3. Memphis Grizzlies (3)

4. Atlanta Hawks (2)

5. Oklahoma City Thunder (5)

6. San Antonio Spurs (NA)

7. Houston Rockets (6)

8. LA Clippers (7)

9. Portland Trailblazers (9)

10. New Orleans Pelicans (NA)

J.J. Watt, NFL Insider

Weekly Pondering:

Whatever happened to loyalty with players? For all the good that advanced metrics and such have done for sport Stateside, it’s starting to get very weird in how people interpret these things. LeSean McCoy has a down season, let’s not ride it out and see if he bounces back, let’s trade him now before he gets any worse. Sure, Chip Kelly must have a plan, this can’t have been a knee-jerk thing, but then he also traded away a quarterback in Nick Foles who had a 14-4 record under his coaching for a former number 1 pick in Sam Bradford who’s fighting just to save his career after injuries and inconsistencies have plagued his NFL tenure. Bradford’s record as a starter in St Louis? 18 wins, 30 losses.

Perhaps it all works out in the Eagles favour, they saved plenty of cap space in dumping McCoy. But it really feels like a continuation of the same thing we’re seeing in the NBA, where players are viewed less as athletes and more as commodities. What’s Rajon Rondo’s trade value? How much could the Saints get back if they flipped Jimmy Graham? The answers to those are ‘as much as possible’.

But while Rondo was at least coming off contract, Graham had only last year signed a four year deal that made him the highest paid tight end in the NFL. He’s really good, he’s in his prime. He’s a fan favourite. But the organisation decided that they were better off with some offensive line help and a first round pick. Ok, yeah, the line help they needed one way or the other. But the Saints should know better than to trust their drafting capabilities.

What’s really grating is the completely cold way in which these trades are happening. The McCoy trade happened in 20 minutes. It’s like a ritual bartering of proven talent for potential talent, a building for a non-guaranteeable future. It really is a cop-out for fan relationships, fans who can at least tell themselves that it’s okay, something better is around the corner, even when it rarely is. Who knows what even a giant compilation of so-called ‘assets’ is worth? Boom or bust, nobody knows. It’s Schrodinger’s Draft Board.

Quote of the Week:

“I’m as shocked as anybody, I love the guy”

– Drew Brees after his favourite target, Jimmy Graham, was traded. Getting left out of the loop, strange times. 

Good Week:

San Antonio Spurs – The champs are on a six game winning streak and charging up the seedings while several Western rivals find themselves slumping. It’s been an easy stretch of the schedule for them, but that’s no detractor. Fellas are healthy finally (well, mostly...), and Kawhi Leonard is back. He’s back, folks. 22.4 ppg, 8.4 rpg and 3 spg over his last 5 games.

DeAndre Jordan (LA Clippers) – It hasn’t been his best week, but he’s been slaying for a while now without Dugout recognition so here he is. The Minister of Defence, as Doc Rivers calls him. Since Blake Griffin got hurt, DeAndre’s averaged 14.2 points and 17.8 rebounds every game. He’s probably now winning Defensive Player of the Year too.

NY Jets – WHAT!? A New York sporting franchise up in the Good Week Stakes? Yeah, but bringing Darrelle Revis back, adding Brandon Marshall and Buster Skrine. Tell ya what, add in a quarterback and a running back and there’s a team Rex Ryan wouldn’t mind coaching. Oh well.

Bad Week:

The Rules – The NFL sent a letter to each of its 32 teams warning them over their blatant exploitation of the free agency window. Players cannot sign for another team until the window opens, which happened earlier this week, yet already by then we’d seen a raft of castaways rowing up to Contract Island. Ndamukong Suh, Byron Maxwell, Jeremy Maclin and a few others all had news of their signings leaked ahead of time, something the NFL has warned they’ll come down hard on. So… expect to have heard the last of this. Unless the alleged tape of Dolphins officials presenting their contract to Suh ever surfaces, that is. (Note to self: Don't get fired...)

Toronto Raptors – It’s looking ugly, sorry Drake. But since ‘If You’re Reading This…’ was released, the Raptors are 3-9.

LA Lakers – The earliest they’ve been eliminated from playoff contention in the history of the franchise, since locating to Los Angeles.

Player of the Week:

Steph Curry (Golden State Warriors) – Nope, not Russell Westbrook this week, that chump only had one triple double in his last two games (and four in a row before that). Nah, he keeps winning and we need some variety, so this week it’s Young Master Curry. In his last 6 games we’re talking 25.3 points, 6.5 assists and 2.2 steals, hitting threes at over 55%! Another surge in his MVP campaign, not that Harden, RussBrook or LeBron have slowed down either. But none of them did this.