Zlatan Only

Searching the World Wide Web for quality goals and egotistical quotes? Don’t wanna waste your time with anything that doesn’t involve Sweden’s most confident and talented footballer? Try this site:

Zlaaatan.com is a search engine that filters all results to exclusively deliver Ibrahimovic-related content. It was created by Swedish ad agency SweetPop, and has attracted over 100,000 hits in its first few days of existence.

"Our search engine is linked to Google's but all the searches are Zlatan-ified. If you type Ferrari you find info about Zlatan's Ferrari, if you search for a recipe, you have the Zlatan Burger. Zlatan is an idol. He is known worldwide, that is why we chose him."

 - Andreas Killander, creative director of SweetPop in interview with French newspaper L'Equipe.

As to why they did it? That’s a very good question.

Meanwhile the man himself has been banned for four games after last month’s tirade against a referee. Wanna know more? You know where to look.

Need Some Extra Motivation?

Alexander Kokorin, 24 year old Russian striker, has plenty. With his Dinamo Moscow side challenging for a Champions League spot as the season. However after a hot start (with a hat-trick in the opening game), Kokorin’s personal form has dried up completely. He hasn’t scored since the end of November.

But you know how it is with strikers, a couple of goals and suddenly they can’t stop scoring. That’s definitely the case for Kokorin, who’s been offered a 16-hour sex marathon by a Russian porn star should he score five more times before the end of the season.

Alina Henessy (instagram), whose actual name is Alina Yeremenko, happens to be a known fan of footballers, she ranked the Russian World Cup squad all out of 10 in terms of attractiveness, reserving maximum marks for Mr Kokorin. Your move, Alex. 

Love Ya Mum

Ipswich fullback Tyrone Mings has been getting plenty of attention for his performances this season. The 22 year old is reportedly a transfer target of the likes of Arsenal and a few others, but at the moment it’s his generosity that’s drawing headlines.

Mings posted this convo between he and his mother on Instagram, apparently he’s used the money he’s earned playing football to wipe away all of his mum’s financial debts. What a bloke.

It’s not the first time Mings has lent a helping hand either. A few months ago he bought match tickets for a broke fan, and last year when some supporters got caught out with their replica jerseys as Mings changed his number from 15 to 3, the lad went and bought them new, correctly numbered ones.

Phallic Absences

Wondering what’s to blame for Carlisle United’s struggles down near the bottom of League Two? It’s now five games without a win after a disastrous collapse in a 3-1 loss to Accrington Stanley, the problem according to manager Keith Curle being that not enough of the team have “male genitalia”. Enjoy the full rant here, the bollocks-lacking talk occurs in the last minute of the interview.

Hristo Stoichkov vs Louis Van Gaal

"I have no respect for him – he's scum. Once when I was injured, I was with my wife at Camp Nou and Van Gaal went up to her. He asked her how it was possible that she married someone like me. She responded that I was a Ballon d'Or winner.”

Not a fan, it seems.

Social Media Stunners

Joey Baron’s Weekly Pearl of Wisdom