Jeremy Brockie – Mamelodi Sundowns (South African Premier Soccer League)

Check this out, then. Barcelona turned up in South Africa just like they said they would and put on a show for a massive crowd at FNB Stadium in Soweto, winning 3-1 thanks to goals from Ousmane Dembele, Luis Suarez and Andre Gomes. Sibusiso Vilakazi pulled one back for the hosts. All in commemoration of the great Nelson Mandela. Also one heck of a story to tell the grandkids one day if you’re Jeremy Brockie.

Jeremy Brockie: “It’s very exciting. You watch those players play every week on TV and you wonder how good they would be in real life, and now we’ve got the opportunity to match ourselves against the best in the world. The boys are very excited, there’s a lot of talk around the changeroom. Hopefully I can get some minutes to say that I’ve played against Barcelona. Normally I’m being Iniesta and Messi and controlling those players [on PlayStation], now I’ll have to try and control them in a different manner!”

Controlling isn’t exactly what he did, coming on late and having a bit of a run around on the right wing and also up front. Almost scored a goal too, which would’ve been insane. The cross was a little out of his reach. But Jeremy Brockie, of Nelson, New Zealand, got to play against Lionel Messi and the lads. Bloody hell.

Messi also came off the bench with the Argentine legend being protected for all but the last fifteen minutes. The entire game definitely had a friendly atmosphere to it which is fair enough because nobody really needing an injury this close to the World Cup. Anyway, Messi got what he came for… a photo with the one and only Jeremy Brockie. Lucky little bastard.

As for all the goals he hasn’t been scoring…

Jeremy Brockie: “No, I am not bothered at all. All the players here have been doing the job and been scoring goals, and winning the games. I was contributing by pushing those players at training and making sure they perform when they come onto the pitch and do the job for the team. I came halfway through the season and when I arrived the club was on top of the table, and the players who got the club on top of the table were in good form. I just need to be patient and wait for my opportunity.”

And now the attention turns towards the Sundowns’ final game of the season, their CAF Champions League group stage game in Guinea tomorrow (Wednesday) against Horoya AC. After a draw in their first match they could use the points in this one to stay ahead of the arrow. Following that contest they hit the offseason, with two months off before the Champs League resumes for them.

Up Next: Away to Horoya, 4am on Wednesday (NZT)

Abby Erceg – North Carolina Courage (American National Women’s Soccer League)

You already heard this but Abby Erceg re-retired from the Football Ferns last week (well, actually it happened a couple months ago but NZF didn’t bother to tell us until now). That’s a massive shame but, as we dug into in this article over here, it ain’t like she isn’t doing amazing things over in America at the moment, representing Aotearoa with majestic domination and world class defending such as this…

That happened as NCC beat Sky Blue 2-1 to reinforce their lead at the top of the ladder, goals from Crystal Dunn and Samantha Mewis in the first half allowing them to control this thing from the front. Which is exactly what they’re doing on the league table too.

Sky Blue are still looking for their first win of the season, although you can’t say they didn’t have their chances. A brilliant double save from Katelyn Rowe denied both Carli Lloyd from the penalty spot and then also Raquel Rodriguez on the rebound. Rowe had a superb game. When Sky Blue finally did score it was an absolutely worldie from Lloyd, striking from a free kick in the fourth minute of injury time.

Erceg was once again in top form at the back for NCC. She almost never makes mistakes. The only problem with this one was that she was supposed to be going up against her old Fernies central defensive partner in Rebekah Stott only for Stotty to be ruled out with injury. Right groin strain is the diagnosis. Doesn’t sound too serious at this stage but never ideal, particularly with an international game coming up soon.

Wasn’t much to say for any of the rest of the kiwi quartet either. Katie Bowen’s Utah Royals won again but she was a late substitute, only playing about eight minutes, while Rosie White was also on the bench again for Chicago Red Stars but remained unused, her comeback from injury gonna have to wait for another week.

Up Next: NCC are away to Orlando Pride, Thursday at 11.30am (NZT)

Michael Boxall – Minnesota United (American Major League Soccer)

A crap result last time, losing 3-1 to San Jose, meant that Minnesota didn’t have too many hopeful vibes ahead of their game with Sporting Kansas City. Even less when they were 1-0 down inside 10 minutes following a Khiry Shelton goal. Beat his bloke to the near post and that was that.

But in the 20th minute a brilliant cross from Miguel Ibarra found Darwin Quintero’s head. His first attempt was saved but he walked in the follow-up and Minnesota were level. Those were two of the Loons’ four total shots on target, two of their six total shots overall (not including an earlier goal disallowed for offside). Sure made the most of it but they were soon under pressure again from SKC, who shaded the first 45 but seriously stepped it up in the second, taking 15 shots and holding 65% possession in that back half of the game.

Minnesota’s midfield is not the best and far too often they gave the ball away in areas that exposed their defence… but Francisco Calvo had a much better game after coming into criticism last week and Bobby Shuttleworth was at his best again in goal. Michael Boxall just does his job so don’t worry about him. Somehow Minnesota held on to draw 1-1 although the coach was a bit pissed they weren’t able to press on from a promising position at half-time. Their first draw of the season, funnily enough.

Interesting wrinkle in the last five minutes. An injury to Rasmus Schüller meant he had to leave the field and on came Brent Kallman in his place. Kallman is the dude that Boxall edged out of the team when he arrived but the two will probably get a run together as partners in defence when Francisco Calvo leaves for the World Cup with Costa Rica soon. He’ll miss at least three games. Calvo had a go in midfield in place of Schüller, leaving Boxall and Kallman with those five minutes to get a hang of that combination in advance.

Up Next: Sunday at 12pm at home to Montreal Impact (NZT)

Katie Rood – Juventus (Italian Serie A)

They did it! Wasn’t easy either, as Juventus’ all-or-nothing playoff for the title against Brescia saw the runaway two best teams in Italy cancel each other out over 120 minutes. It was down to penalties to split them and when Brescia sent their final spottie over the crossbar, well, that meant we could finally crown a winner after 22 games and another couple hours on top of that.

It would’ve been nice to say that Roodie scored the winning penalty or something but she didn’t quite make the bench in this final game, all goods. There’ll be a few more games to play next campaign with the Champions League on the cards. Now for the celebrations…

Shout out to Gigi Buffon while we’re at it.

Up Next: Hopefully something exciting on YouTube

Aimee Phillips – Spartak Subotica (Serbian Super Liga Žene)

Aimee didn’t get a look in at the latest Footy Ferns squad so it’s only fair to let her feature in some Flying Kiwis instead. Since popping up in Serbia she’s had no trouble scoring goals. Neither has her team, which breezed through the regular season in heroic form, scoring 86 goals and conceding a mere 3 as they won 13 of their 14 games, qualifying for the top four championship round.

In the topskees the top four teams play each other home and away again as well as transferring over their results against the other three sides. Those points all combine and the overall leader is the overall winner, lifting the trophy. So jumping in here on the championship round games, Spartak have played five more times and, with one more match remaining, still have it all on the line next week. They’ll host LASK Crvena Zvezda and a victory will clinch the title, a draw or loss will mean second while Crvena Zvezda get the silverware. Crvena Zvezda won 2-1 against Spartak in their previous clash so it’s bound to be a belter.

And Aimee Phillips has been starting every game and still banging them into the net. She scored the only goal in the defeat against Crvena Zvezda and also put one away in the cup quarterfinal two weeks earlier, a 9-0 win over Kanjiža. Unfortunately that cup run came to a halt in the semis as they went down 5-4 on penalties to Crvena Zvedza following a 1-1 draw.

Up Next: Spartak Subotica vs LASK Crvena Zvezda, catch this one on Saturday (NZT)

Stefan Marinovic – Vancouver Whitecaps (American Major League Soccer)

AFTN: “Stefan Marinović suffered a left knee sprain in training on Thursday. He’s gone for an MRI this week and while the results are still unknown he is expected to miss the next few weeks, so it’s a safe bet that Rowe will make his second start of the year on Wednesday. He was pretty unremarkable against the Dynamo, but with Marinović out indefinitely, the ‘Caps will be leaning on him to hold down the fort.”

Still waiting on the official diagnosis but as of now he’s considered out indefinitely, with some guesses keeping him out up to six weeks.

The Caps drew again, by the way. They were 1-0 up on the brink of half-time at home to San Jose thanks to a Christian Techera goal but then Danny Hoesen scored in injury time and Nick Lima gave SJE the lead within ten minutes of the resumption. Yordy Reyna equalised for a 2-2 final score, however that was one the Cappies shoulda won. Then a few days later they travelled to Big Ol’ Texas to take on FC Dallas and drew 2-2 again. Their third 2-2 draw in a row, weirdly.

Up Next: Vancouver vs New England, Sunday at 9.30am (NZT)

Ali Riley – FC Rosengård (Swedish Damallsvenskan)

In case you wanted to know what that Svenska Cupen trophy from last week looks like, now you do. Very big and very shiny. An early addition to the trophy cabinet for FC Rosengård.

However we may only be five rounds into the league stuff but they’ve already got their work to do in that competition. There would’ve been some cheers coming outta Rosie HQ when Linköping went down 1-0 away to Limhamn Bunkeflo a day before Rosengård’s game… only for the Rosies to lose as well, beaten 2-0 in a shocker away to Kristianstad. Therese Ivarsson scored in the first half and Ogonna Chukwudi in the second. Full game for Ali Riley although that doesn’t really compensate for Rosengård’s first loss of the 2018 season.

Elsewhere Hannah Wilkinson was an 82nd minute introduction for Vittsjö but was unable to salvage a point as they lost 1-0 against Götenborg, Julia Roddar’s 6th minute goal the difference there. Been a tough run for Vittsjö who have lost three games in a row now, all by a score of 1-0.

Up Next: Rosengård vs Vittsjö, Flying Kiwis derby, 3.30am on Monday (NZT)

Ryan Thomas – PEC Zwolle (Dutch Eredivisie)

There you go, that’s Thommo being crowned the ‘Most Energetic Player’ for PEC Zwolle, as voted by the fans at home games. They gave him some flowers and a certificate after the team’s final training session for the season and then asked him to sell season tickets for next time even though he probably won’t be there. Nice dude.

Up Next: Nothing much

Anna Green – Reading / Olivia Chance – Everton (English Super League)

Injury robbed Olivia Chance the opportunity to finish her season with Everton and the Toffees didn’t do a whole lot without her, losing their last couple games to finish ninth on the table, one place ahead of relegated Yeovil Town (although they were never in doubt of getting caught by winless YT).

Anna Green’s Reading, on the other hand, they came close to hunting down Arsenal for third place – which would’ve been incredible had they pulled it off. Especially after losing 3-1 to the Gunners a month ago. They won three games in a row on either side of that and briefly did climb to third before Arsenal won their game in hand and smashed Bristol City 6-1 in their last game to make sure of it. But a fourth placed finish for Reading is still a new record for the club.

Which means it’s season over for the two kiwi gals in the WSL. Chance played in 11 games for 615 minutes in league action while Greenie played 262 minutes in five appearances. Those numbers don’t really tell the full story, from Chance’s FA Cup heroics and Greenie’s regularly getting named on the bench, just an injury away from a run in the first XI. It’s been real.

Up Next: Footy Ferns are on in a few weeks…

Jake Gleeson & Bill Tuiloma – Portland Timbers (American Major League Soccer)

Obviously the Timbers have a plan for Bill Tuiloma because with the first team playing their best stuff of the season without him he’s played his third straight game with the USL side. Seems to be that he’s fully fit again or he wouldn’t have played ninety minutes in three straight starts for T2 but it also seems to be that they’d rather him playing games than sitting on the bench, which is hard to argue with after his happenings at Olympic Marseille. There were seven contracted Timbers players in the latest reserves’ squad so it’s a bit of a thing.

That latest T2 game was at home against LA Galaxy 2 and it’s worth a chat. Like the moment, in the 25th minute, when the first goal was scored by Foster Langodorf after Tuiloma’s long ball helped initiate the move. Langodorf had another one before the half.

Lango completed his hatty within the hour though LAG2 pulled goals back on either side to make it 3-2 with half an hour to play. Two superb goals cutting in from the right, nothing to do with anything Billy T could have prevented. Neither could anyone have done anything about Efrain Alvarez’s super volleyed equalised in the 68th minute either. But Eryck Williamson saved Portland with ten minutes left, putting them back up 4-3 and then a flurry of late goals absolutely busted it open. 7-3 was the final score after three injury time goals for Portland.

As for the MLS team, it was the same old same old. They beat LAFC 2-1 thanks to a late strike from Samuel Armenteros after Carlos Vela had cancelled out Cristhian Paredes’ opener early in the second half. Heaps of chances for the Timbers, even if they played a lot of this one without the ball. Jake Gleeson was on the bench.

Bill Tuiloma may not be with the reserves much longer though. Liam Ridgewell, who Tui briefly replaced at the back for his run of MLS games, pulled up early with a muscle injury and there’s a chance he could be spending some time on the sideline with that knock. New signing Julio Cascante came on to replace him and looked good for the 84 minutes or so that he played, just his second appearance for the Timbers. He’s been on the bench for all but one game in 2018 so Tuiloma’s started ahead of him in the past but we’ll find out next week which way the coaches are leaning… and next week will be a goodie for Bill Tuiloma to play, since it’s away to Anthony Hudson’s Colorado Rapids.

Up Next: Colorado Rapids vs Portland Timbers, 1pm on Sunday (NZT)

Ryan de Vries – FC Gifu (Japanese J2-League)

Wondering how former Auckland City goal-specialist and one-cap All White Ryan de Vries has been going in Japan? Wonder no more, friend.

RDV has been slowly working his way into the team at FC Gifu and by now he’s pretty much top choice. 11 games all up, eight of them starts. Still yet to score a goal but in their latest game he made his best impression yet, setting up a goal with a back-heeled assist while completing the ninety minutes for the first time in a 2-0 win away against Omiya Ardija. Gifu are pretty comfortably in the mid-table 15 games into their season but with three wins from four, they’re hitting a slice of form at the moment.

Up Next: FC Gifu v Albirex Niigata, 6pm on Sunday (NZT)

Erin Nayler– Girondins Bordeaux (French Division 1 Féminine)

Girondins haven’t been putting their best foot forward lately. Seven games without a win and only four goals scored in that run, including a grand total of zero in the last three matches. Not the best at all and yet if they win their final game against Lille then they can still get fifth. Lose and it’s still possible that they can be relegated… although that’d require four other results to go the wrong way for them so they oughta be all goods. Nayler hasn’t been playing through the whole streak having missed a few games on compassionate leave but she has played the last two, both 1-0 defeats. Maybe if those forwards would score a few goals…

Up Next: 1am on Monday against Lille (NZT)

Tommy Smith, Kip Colvey & Deklan Wynne – Colorado Rapids (American Major League Soccer)

Last week it was the New York Red Bulls that slipped past the Rapids for a 2-1 win. This week they travelled to the Big Apple to have a dig at Patrick Vieira’s New York City FC (at Yankee Stadium, no less) and took another L. And this one wasn’t so easy to find the positives from.

Didn’t take long before the home side took control, a giveaway from Edgar Castillo ended up with Ismael Tajouri-Shradi one on one but Tim Howard came up with an impressive save stretching out with his leg. A couple more sighters were sent off target, to Colorado’s relief, but then hero Howard turned villain with a terrible clearance that allowed NYCFC to attack a disjointed defence and David Villa, the Spanish legend who was honoured for his 400th career goal pre-match, wasn’t about to miss from there. Deklan Wynne played him onside… but to be fair they also shouldn’t have lost possession in that area. Might’ve reacted quicker even still.

It was still 0-1 at half-time but then it didn’t take long before Ronald Matarrita made it two with a clever header after some sumptuous build up play from Villa and Jo Inge Berget. Seven minutes later a sharp shot from the edge of the box from Maximiliano Morález made it three and Villa had his second, left loose on Wynne’s side with the wingback nowhere in sight, in the 74th minute. The Rapids go down 4-0 and have now lost five games in a row, dropping to the bottom of the Western Conference after ten games.

Smith and Wynne played 90 minutes while Colvey was an unused sub. Somehow in the midst of the slump Hudson’s stocks continue to apparently rise (a sharp agent and some swift wiki edits go a long way) and those links to Sunderland remain ongoing. Nobody really thinks it’ll happen, he’s easily the lowest regarded option on the rumours five-man shortlist, but Huddo still took the time to rubbish the allegations… which of course draws attention and validates them.

Anthony Hudson to Pro Soccer USA: “My life right now is the Colorado Rapids. I’m just dying to get this team to where we want to be. I want to be here for a long time. I want to build something special here. I communicate that regularly to [Rapids VP & GM Padraig Smith]. I know where we are now, I know what needs to happen, I know the changes we need to make. I know what this team can be. I want to see it through. I want to be here a long time. So, I’m not thinking about anything else.”

That’s nice and all but with two wins from ten games and sitting last in the conference having other opportunities might be rather helpful. The feedback from Colorado’s latest defeat was not kind.

MLS Multiplex: “Slow and ponderous in possession, they generated just three shots on target all game, two of which were relatively speculative efforts once New York had already established their four-goal advantage. And defensively, they weren’t much better. Poor turnovers, no awareness of danger, a lack of positional discipline and understanding. This was a lesson in how to allow yourselves to be turned over as quickly and painlessly as possible. The Rapids have now lost five in a row. They are stone-dead last of the West and face the Portland Timbers next week. I wonder if Anthony Hudson’s butt is getting hot yet.”

Up Next: Colorado Rapids vs Portland Timbers, Sunday at 1pm (NZT)

Elliot Collier – Chicago Fire (American Major League Soccer)

Another stupid result for the Fire, who lost 3-2 at home to Houston Dynamo. Bastian Schweinsteiger wasn’t happy about it. They were 2-1 up at half-time but whatever. Doesn’t matter because Collier didn’t even play. The rookie finally missed his first game but he wasn’t dropped, he was injured. A left gastroc injury, picked up during the week. Not ideal with an All Whites squad about to be named but then as an MLS player he wouldn’t have been included anyway. No international breaks there.

Up Next: Orlando City vs Chicago Fire, Sunday at 11.30am (NZT)

A Couple Other Treats…

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