Sarpreet Singh - Bayern Munich II (German Liga 3)

Derby Day football, the threat of relegation looming large, second to last game of the season, a kiwi midfielder with a point to prove after a difficult few months... the ingredients were all there for a Sarpreet Singh special and well what do you know in the 49th minute he slashed in from the right and curled home a strike to put his team up 2-1...

Bayern II had gone up in the 13th minute against 1860 Munich after Armindo Sieb snuck behind the defence and made that net swish. Exactly where BM2 needed to be except the same issues that have plagued them all season weren’t going away: poor finishing, sloppy goals conceded. Young player dramas for a team that has seen a lot of its best players from the last couple years either promoted to the first team or sent out on loan... if not leave the club entirely.

Singh had one of those chances, getting free on the right wing as BM2 got out on the counter but as he cut inside he curled his shot past the post. Sounds similar to the goal he’d later score because it was. He had a sighter, then he corrected himself next time. But by then Bayern had been pegged back by the concession of a penalty just before the half: a handball from a sliding defender, no doubt about it, and Sascha Mölders buried it from the spot.

Singh did his thing and that was all forgotten at 2-1... but he had another shot saved low soon after and that wasn’t the only one that got away for BM2 before a slightly unfortunate penalty, the striker sticking his foot across a defender and drawing contact, allowed Phillipp Steinhart to take it and score this time (68 mins gone). Bayern couldn’t muster a third lead. A game they probably did enough to get three points from against one of the better teams in the division ended up in a 2-2 draw and it’s going to need a minor miracle to keep Bayern from being relegated now.

Bavarian Football Works: “Sarpreet Singh was probably the best player on the pitch. If only another one of his shots had gone in, Bayern could’ve come out of this with three points. As it stands, relegation is basically guaranteed.”

What this means is that they need to win their last game against Hallescher; fail to do that and it’s all over no matter what else happens. Yet even supposing they do win then they also need both Uerdingen to lose (vs 8th placed SV Waldhof away) and SV Meppen to lose or draw (vs 14th placed MSV Duisburg at home) to avoid dropping to the fourth tier. Honestly, whether they get relegated or not you’d hope that Sarpreet Singh is a level above that anyway. Ideally with the first team but another loan might be more likely – next season is the last of Singh’s initial contract and if he spends it in the reserve team it’s unlikely he gets another one.

Up Next: BM2 vs Hallescher, Saturday at 11.30pm (NZT)

Michael Woud – Almere City (Dutch Eerste Divisie)

“EXPIRED: It was a great season for Almere City FC, but tonight it will end with a dull blow”

Man, all that work all season to get to the playoffs, from looking for at least half of it like they were a good bet for automatic promotion, and then once they get to those playoffs they’re smoked 4-0 in the quarters and that’s season over. No promotion and it’s back to the Eerste Divisie for Michael Woud and Almere City – Woud of course having made his loan from Willem II a permanent deal in January.

AC have been a pretty dominant defensive team for most of the season – Woud has kept 13 clean sheets – but they also have these blowout days where the defence turns to arse. That 604 win over Excelsior in September. A 7-2 loss to Cambuur in November. They lost 4-1 to VVV in the KNVB Cup in December. 4-0 to NAC Breda in February. Now this one, going down 4-0 to NEC who they’d beaten both times during the regular season.

Almere actually scored the opening goal – which is weird so say about a 4-0 defeat – but a thumping finish from Thomas Verheydt at close range after a clever backheel into his path from John Yeboah was cancelled out as the VAR stepped in because of a (pretty obvious) handball in the lead-up. Then things got ugly. Some sketchy defending led to a penalty against AC in the 20th min... Michael Woud stepped up to save that sucker but the resistance was broken in the 36th as Jonathan Okita ran onto a quick free kick pumped long and a poor touch from the defender allowed him to get around and into the area where he sent Woudy the wrong way. Just four minutes later Jordy Bruijn made amends for his earlier spot kick miss as a trip after a corner kick gave NEC their second penalty of the half. Woud dove to his opposite side this time, Bruijn kicked it the same way to score.

The game stayed at 2-0 for quite awhile but when Javier Vet snuck in at the near post to squeeze one under Woud with twenty to play it was all over, hope extinguished. That goal coming after Woud had made a mess of trying to punch a cross away, failing to clear it with two attempts and then the ball came back in again and that was 3-0.

Okita added his second of the night in the 75th min and again it was Woud’s fault. Rushing out to punch a high looping cross but hitting it straight to Okita on the edge of the area who had an easy finish with Woud out of position. Not the best way to finish the season. It had already gotten away from them before his two blunders but having been largely excellent for them this campaign (with one or two errors, like any keeper) that’ll leave a sour note until next season rolls around.

Tell ya what though, no goalie played more minutes in the Eerste Divisie than Michael Woud did this season. No goalie could have because Woud played every second of every game. 38 of them all up in which he conceded 48 goals and kept 14 clean sheets. That’s not including the playoff game either. Despite being around the Flying Kiwis ranks for several years now, Woud is still only 22 years of age and this was his first season playing regular senior football. Plus fourth place in the Eerste Divisie is the club’s highest ever finish since it was rebranded as Almere City a little less than a couple decades ago. Always valuable to keep things in context.

Up Next: Wallowing, mostly... until the Olympics

Meikayla Moore – Liverpool (English Championship)

You thought her season was done but there was one last little thing to take care of: Meikayla Moore getting nominated for Championship Player of the Month for April (alongside Tatiana Saunders of Lewes, Jess King of Charlton & Katy Morris of Charlton)... same as how she was nominated for the December award. Decent haul for your first season in the league.

The POTM is decided by a mix of public votes and expert panel selections and definitely the public vote aspect suits a big club like Liverpool (one of the few situations where their alignment with the men’s team is actually used to its potential – Moore got 48% of the public vote on Twitter for example), and it’s been Liverpool players winning the previous two editions of the honour: Ceri Holland in February and Niamh Fahey in March. Here are some kind words from LFC...

“Liverpool FC Women defender Meikayla Moore has been nominated for FA Women's Championship Player of the Month. The centre-back helped the Reds keep two clean sheets in their two league games during April and weighed in with a headed goal herself in the 2-0 win against Lewes Women. Moore, 24, is now firmly established at the heart of an LFC Women defence that conceded just 15 league goals all season – the joint-lowest in the division.”

Sadly, despite Moore comprehensively winning the fan votes the so-called experts were of a different opinion and that swayed things in this direction...

Robbed. Absolutely robbed.

In other news, the new gaffer’s been announced...

It’ll be Matt Beard’s second stint with the team having coached them from 2013-15, twice winning FA WSL Manager of the Year. Funky thing about him is that he’s had kiwis with him wherever he’s gone. Sarah Gregorius and Rosie White both crossed paths with him at Liverpool, he then coached Rosie White at Boston Breakers, had charge of West Ham when they signed Ria Percival (and made an FA Cup final), and now it’s Meikayla Moore at Liverpool 2.0.

Up Next: Offseason blues

Callum McCowatt & Elijah Just - FC Helsingør (Danish Division 1)

Hey, alright. Not sure what’s gotten into FCH over the last couple months but they keep on getting better and better and here they pumped HB Køge 5-0 on their own turf and to make matters even sweeter Callum McCowatt bagged a brace. It took him long enough to get that first goal for the club but now he seems to really be finding his feet. Here’s what the team website had to say about the two goals...

“After just over half an hour, the opportunity came. Callum McCowatt found Oliver Kjærgaard in the box with a good slanted ball, and Kjærgaard took a single touch, then played it back into the feet of the oncoming McCowatt on the left side of the box. HB Køge's offside line was broken and from a sharp angle McCowatt safely put the ball into the opposite side of the goal.”

“But HB Køge still did not come forward on the field, and in the 54th minute they paid the price. A poor clearance from HB Køge's central defence dumped down at the feet of Lucas Haren out on the right side of the field. Lucas took a quick look up, sending the ball coolly across the small box, with a flat, hard pass that caught Kruse out in the box. In the middle of the goal, Adamsen could not reach the ball, but at the back post, Callum McCowatt stood ready to put it in with a flat instep.”

The second and fourth goals there in a comprehensive win, FCH doing the damage with three goals in the back half of the first half. Elijah Just was on the bench for all that but he came on in the 62nd min with the major business having been taken care of... in fact he replaced Callum McCowatt (who is now up to three goals for the season while Just has five).

Didn’t get any of that in their second game of the week but guess what? They won again. 2-1 over Fredericia with Eli Just starting this time and McCowatt replacing him after 63 minutes. Nicklas Mouritsen put them up on 23 mins after a really positive start had led to several FCH chances already, and Tonni Adamsen popped up in the right place to make it two bright and early in the second half. In between Eli Just almost set up a goal for Ademsen but his shot had been saved, then later Just had a chance to make it three but chose to pass instead of shoot and the ball back across was cut out by a defender. The last twenty mins got a bit itchy after Christian Tue Jensen pulled one back for Fredericia but Helsingør closed it out. McCowatt almost set up a third goal but David Boysen couldn’t finish it off. All goods, 2-1 the final score and that means that FCH cannot finish any lower than fourth.

Up Next: FCH vs Silkeborg, 5am on Saturday (NZT)

Betsy Hassett - Stjarnan (Icelandic Úrvalsdeild Kvenna)

Stjarnan up against Selfoss away, a team without a win yet against the only team to have won both their first two matches so you can guess which was this was expected to go. And yet the Stars very nearly threw a spanner in the works from a 22nd min corner kick which Betsy Hassett headed off the crossbar. The rebound fell to Anna María Baldursdóttir... but she put it over with an open goal in front of her. Instead Selfoss took the lead ten minutes afterwards and kept that lead into the half.

Betsy Hassett’s one of the few senior players in a very young Stjarnan team and sometimes you’ve just gotta lead by example. Early in the second spell the Stars got out on the counter attack and boom there was Hassett to slickly put it away for the equaliser. But they couldn’t hold on. A couple goals in the space of five mins (62’ & 66’) gave Selfoss what to be honest was a deserved 3-1 win. But hey that’s Betsy Hassett on the board for the new league season, having also put one away in League Cup action earlier. Can’t find video of the goal anywhere annoyingly but so it goes.

Up Next: Thursday at 6am vs Þór/KA away (NZT)

Ria Percival – Tottenham Hotspur (English Super League)

Look who made it back just in time for the end of the season. The manager had said all along that they were trying to get her fit for this game and although she didn’t make the starting line-up, Percy was brought on at half-time of the FA Cup clash against Sheffield United with Spurs 1-0 up.

That goal was scored by Lucy Quinn with an emphatic strike into the near top corner after being played in on the overlap out wide right. A deserved goal after a strong opening half hour from Spurs but they’d needed extra time to get past Reading in the previous round and they’d need extra time again here. Percival came on at the break after Sheff Utd had responded well to the goal, Percy there to try and ease some of the pressure coming back the other way. Yet it was on the attacking front that she almost made a rapid impact with a low drive just past the post. So-hyun Cho went even closer for Spurs when she hit the post.

However a goalkeeping error with ten to play cost them bad as Becky Spencer came out for a ball over the top but couldn’t clear it and Lucy Watson patiently slipped the ball into the empty net to force extras. Spurs did have a chance or two to win it in regulars, like Jess Naz firing just over after some lovely midfield play advancing the ball from Percival, but nah they had to do it the hard way. Percival probably wasn’t expecting to play as much as she did on her return and was subbed off at the halfway point of extras (so, an even sixty minutes of footy there), with Kit Graham scoring what’d be the winner in the 108th minute. Good cross in from Naz, free header for Graham to be the hero. Spurs win it 2-1 and when the competition picks up again next season they’ll be in the quarter-finals.

Up Next: Offseason/Olympics

Chris Wood - Burnley FC (English Premier League)

Now that’s what we’re talking about. Fifty Chris Wood goals in one fifteen minute supercut? Yeah mate. Have an extended geeze at that one and when you’re done we’ll carry on with Burnley vs Leeds.

Prior to this season Burnley and Leeds hadn’t met in the top division since 1976... although Chris Wood did actually play against his old team not long after signing for Burnley, coming off the bench in a League Cup tie in 2017 (scoring from the penalty spot in regular time and also in the shootout, which Leeds won). He also got 90 mins against them at Elland Road in December, Leeds winning 1-0 thanks to an early Patrick Bamford penalty. Still, it’s always a funky one against an old club and there are still a few Leeds dudes that he was teammates with back in the day. Stuart Dallas, Luke Ayling, and Kalvin Phillips all started while Liam Cooper and Gaetano Berardi were on the bench... but the crazy thing is there were as many members of the Leeds 2016-17 season squad starting for Burnley as there were for Leeds. Chris Wood, Charlie Taylor, and keeper Bailey Peacock-Farrell (in for an injured Nick Pope). Funny that.

Aside from the opening ten minutes or so when Burnley got off to a fast start with their typically direct and combative style of footy, this was not a reunion to remember fondly for Chris Wood. All those traits of his recent killer form went missing against a team that knows how to hold possession and knows how to create space with off-the-ball movement. It took maybe half an hour for Leeds to get into their stride but once they did there was no turning back. Mateusz Klich scored a ripper from distance just before the half. Jack Harrison cheekily flicked in a second, diverting a shot from Ezgjan Alioski into the net. There were numerous corner kicks, Alioski himself missed a couple great chances, as Leeds were very much in control of this game and Chris Wood looked a frustrated man as a result.

His first shot of the game came on 57 minutes when he slipped back onto his right foot as the ball came his way on the edge of the area and he tried to curl it into the top corner but missed the target... close but not close enough to panic anyone. His first shot was also his only shot. Most of the time he spent tangling with Diego Llorente or Luke Ayling and although he was a willing battler with those aerial balls there wasn’t much reward for him. There was some complaining at officials about a few challenges too. Just a game that didn’t go his way, it was bound to happen again eventually, and it wasn’t a huge shock when he and Matej Vydra were both withdrawn on 65 mins. Rodrigo went on to add a couple late goals for Leeds and it ended 4-0. Still two more games left for The Woodsman to add to his goal tally.

Up Next: Thursday at 7.15am, Burnley vs Liverpool (NZT)

Abby Erceg – North Carolina Courage / Rosie White – OL Reign (American National Women’s Soccer League)

Straight back in there now that the real footy has begun, all recovered from that preseason injury, and Abby Erceg so nearly had the perfect reintroduction with this header from a second minute corner kick against OL Reign coming back off the crossbar.

That turned out to be as close as either team came to scoring all day. It was a defensive masterclass from both teams really, shutting everything down (apart from the bit when Abby Erceg did one of those sneaky professional fouls to break up a decent attack, some calls for that to be a red but a yellow sufficed in the eyes of the ref). The game did open up in the back half but that was annoying too because it was after Rosie White had been subbed off for the Reign. Given the start in an attacking midfield role she hadn’t really been able to influence the match at all and was replaced at the break.

Kristen Hamilton drew a good save in the 56th for NCC (and another in the 78th) while the Reign had a few optimistic shots from Jess Fishlock to get them going. Then substitute Megan Rapinoe hit the post in the 69th min, each team rocking the frame of the goal via a national legend, before Jess Fishlock shot too early on the runaway in the 76th min and put it wide. The Courage got stretched in those latter stages but they held on for a 0-0 draw. Clean sheet to start the campaign – remember this is an NCC defence that’s much changed since last year, Erceg aside, so that’s an achievement for sure.

Up Next: Sunday at 11am against Orlando Pride (NZT)

Michael Boxall – Minnesota United (American Major League Soccer)

It was the 72nd minute of the match. Minnesota Utd hosting Vancouver Whitecaps. Robin Lod had the ball out wide on the right, looking for room to get back onto his left foot. In came the cross. Ramon Abila in the middle, the ball appeared too deep for him but he got up there with a flicked header that snuck just inside the box. The defence appealed for offside but no dice. That was the goal that earned Minnesota United their first win of 2021.

It hadn’t always looked flash. That rubbish early form continued in the fifth minute when the Loons gave the ball away cheaply at the back, Chase Gasper with a rank backpass, and even with Michael Boxall launching himself at a block against the cutback after the keeper had been beaten that shot still should’ve probably hit the target from Cristian Dájome. Instead he popped it over the top, sweet as. Minnesota escaped and although they didn’t really do much on attack the rest of the first half they mostly tidied things up at the back (apart from a stretched period from like 20-30 mins), while recalled GK Tyler Miller making a few solid stops from long shots and by the end of the stanza Emanuel Reynoso was beginning to inspire a few things up the other end.

Just being even at the half was a nice thing for Minny after four straight losses but this game was still poised to go either way. A great start to the half saw Reynoso go close but the Whitecaps came dashing back after awhile with Miller again having to make a couple more stops. But the introduction of Abila seemed to give them something extra. He hit one over the top from about eight yards on the cutback on 68 mins but he made no mistake with the next one that came his way. With a lead to protect the Loons put it on lock for the latter stages. One very sketchy moment after a Vancouver free kick just outside the area but they got there. 1-0 the final score. A desperately needed win in Michael Boxall’s 101st Minnesota Utd appearance.

No time to rest after that because it was FC Dallas coming to visit just a few days later... a game which had a lot in common with the previous one. The Loons started slow against a team looking to get the ball into the box nice and quick (Dallas were flagged offside TEN times in the match), but they stepped things up physically to try and set a tone and soon enough began to threaten goals themselves thanks largely to the work of Emanuel Reynoso like always. Reynoso was the guy who came closest to scoring in a tactically gruelling first half but in honesty neither team really looked like they could bust down the defence of the other.

That changed in the second half. After escaping danger when their keeper misplaced a punch clear, Minnesota began to get on top and a few pesky moments led to Ramon Abila being introduced and once again the Loons were all over their opponents with Abila, Reynoso, and Robin Lod all combining.

However getting an actual real tangible goal was the hard part. Dallas sat deeper for the draw as the momentum got away from them and deep into stoppage time it looked like a scoreless draw was gonna be the go. Then Robin Lod crept up after a Brent Kallman header from a corner was blocked on the line and poked the ball in for the 94th minute winner, how about it? Six points from two games and suddenly the terrible start doesn’t look as bad as it did a week ago.

Now some stuff on his 100th appearance. Which he didn’t really care about but still a nice gesture...

Michael Boxall: “Honestly, it’s doesn’t mean a whole lot for me. I think you can’t kind of get caught up in trying to chase x-amount of games. Like for me, I’m just trying to focus on the next one. So, obviously game number 100 didn’t go too well in Colorado, so you just want to move on to the next one. And then, when I went home and looked at the shirt and some of the words that some of the boys had written, that’s going to be a cool thing to look back on when it’s all said and done, but I’m just focused on the next one. Just trying to push this team up the ladder and make sure we are playing some important games come October and November.”

Some more kind words this time excerpted from an MNUFC website feature on the fella...

“If you’re reading this, please take a moment to put your hands together for Michael Boxall. It’s applause for what he’s done for this club on the field: leading by example, showing up solid day in and day out and being a catalyst for growth. And it’s applause for what he’s done for this club and community off the field as well: being a constant resource, getting incredibly involved and making a difference.

But really, it’s applause for being the first to hit the 100 appearances for MNUFC in MLS milestone for this club. A milestone that says an incredible amount about a player, no matter how humble they are. The numbers speak! First of all, by the numbers, it quite literally means Boxall has played a lot of soccer in an MNUFC kit. He has clocked in 8,607 minutes for the Loons and, while we’re talking kits, he has sported all six. When he signed with Minnesota United on July 12, 2017 in its inaugural season, he started 12 of 12 games to close out the season. Every season after that – including the current 2021 season – he followed the pattern and started every game he played. ”

Up Next: Real Salt Lake away on Sunday 30 May at 1.30pm (NZT)

Bill Tuiloma – Portland Timbers (American Major League Soccer)

The Timbers were scrambling for players for their trip to San Jose. Starting keeper Steve Clark was injured in the season opener and is still recovering while his backup Jeff Attinella is out for the year now and that meant an emergency loan goalie got a debut: Logan Ketterer. Shout out to that guy because he’d go on to save a penalty in this match. They were also short in the attacking areas with Diego Chara out hurt and captain Diego Valeri only on the bench. Plus defender Larrys Mabiala’s hamstring hadn’t recovered in time after he was subbed off in the first half of the previous game. Bill Tuiloma replaced him then and Bill Tuiloma replaced him now.

And Bill Tuiloma led the Timbers defence to a clean sheet and a victory. A fifth minute goal from Yimmi Chara capped a hot start from Portland and that gave them something to defend with their weakened team. San Jose would have three quarters of possession in the first half but the closest either team came to scoring again before HT was when Dario Zuparic, Tui’s CB partner, hit the crossbar for Portland.

Following a similarly hot start to the second spell (albeit without a goal), Portland had a right old scare on the hour mark when Claudio Bravo handballed in the box – perhaps mistaking himself for his goalkeeping namesake – but that was when the debutant keeper stepped up. Or rather: dove low to his left. Denying MLS legend Chris Wondolowski no less.

About ten minutes later Eryk Williamson crossed beautifully to the back post for Marvin Loria (EW’s second assist of the game) and that was 2-0 off the head of Loria... which would be the final score. Really solid effort from that entire Portland defence, with Tuiloma impressing yet again. He did get a yellow in the first half for a heavy challenge but that’s okay, you’re allowed one.

Quick interview time...

(Good laugh on that Fox one hearing the American fella really emphasis his pronunciation of ‘Olympique’ and then chase that up with a ‘Mar-Sell’ for Billy’s old club in France)

Up Next: Sunday at 7.30am against LA Galaxy (NZT)

Elliot Collier – Chicago Fire (American Major League Soccer)

All three of the MLS teams with NZers on board have had poor starts but Chicago are alone in that they were expected to suck. So no surprises when they came out on the backfoot in their midweek game away against DC United and conceded in the seventh minute as Edison Flores popped one in off his head after a dinked cross found him unmarked. They were also lucky not to concede again on twenty mins when Julian Gressel rocked the crossbar... but after about half an hour the Fire began to find their sea-legs. 17-year-old Brian Gutierrez should arguably have done better after combining with Robert Beric in the 35th min... and he very nearly did in the 37th when he curled one off the post.

None of this included Elliot Collier who was back to the bench for CF after starting their previous game, he’d be subbed on with half an hour remaining and the Fire needing to get back on top if they were going to salvage anything. DCU had them clinging on a few times but then on came Collier and mate he nearly made the difference straight away. A ball swung in over his head deflected back across to him but his left-footed volley went straight at a well-positioned keeper, 71 mins gone. Nine mins later there was a lobbed cross stood up to the back stick but a little too high even for Collier whose header was never in control as it looped out for a goal kick. Fabian Herbers then hit the crossbar with a header in stoppage time and bugger that’s a 1-0 defeat for Chicago.

Up Next: Sunday 23 May at 10am against Inter Miami (NZT)

Ali Riley - Orlando Pride (American National Women’s Soccer League)

No Ali Riley this week. She played every minute of the Challenge Cup campaign but game one of the proper season went by without her – the only one of the kiwi quartet not to start in the NWSL this week in a flip of the script – as she recovers from a hamstring injury. Riley was close to playing according to the updates coming out of the camp so don’t expect this to delay her loooong awaited NWSL debut much more. As for the game itself, Orlando drew with Washington Spirit. Fell behind to an Ashley Hatch goal with quarter of an hour left but Alex Morgan scored in the 84th to share the points.

Meanwhile of course there’s more of all this off-field excellence...

Up Next: Away to North Carolina Courage on Sunday at 11am (NZT)

Katie Bowen – Kansas City (American National Women’s Soccer League)

Another draw. 0-0 between Louisville and Kansas City, Katie Bowen getting the full game at fullback in a game where excitement was of a minimum. Amy Rodriguez had an early chance for KC. Louisville probably had the better of the game but only had one shot on target all arvo (and it was a crack from distance straight at the keeper). Bowen chipped a dangerous ball into the box which the keeper couldn’t claim in the second half but it didn’t break for KC on the seconds. Not a game that anyone’s gonna remember for long but hey it’s a decent clean sheet to get up and running in the regular season.

Up Next: Monday at 1am away against Houston Dash (NZT)

Joe Bell – Viking FK (Norwegian Eliteserien)

Referring back to last week, The Niche Cache has managed to elicit a clean translation of that Joe Bell chant so you can sing along at home and know what it is you’re saying...

Not so many opportunities to sing the song this week however (even allowing for the fact that there are no fans in the stands) because they lost twice and didn’t score a goal in either game. The first of those was the worst. Up against Rosenborg they were thoroughly bossed around with the writing on the wall in the seventh minute of the match when Joe Bell went into the book for a late challenge. Not that he was too happy about it...

They also had an injury in the first half, Sam Fridjonsson having to be subbed off, and to cut a long story short they just kept conceding periodic goals and lost 5-0. Didn’t really create much of their own at all until the result was long since decided – Bell subbed off midway through the second half.

Things were more competitive in the other game at home against Tromsø. VFK came out firing, getting the ball into the box (including some sexy Joe Bell corner kicks) and working shots... but wow that finishing was just atrocious. 18 shots and only one on target. Thus the game stayed level longer than it should have and Tromsø swung things back their way late in the half, including one close chance after Joe Bell was mobbed in midfield and lost the ball. Then Tomas Totland scored in the 53rd minute for Tromsø and VFK kinda lost their way. Their immediate response was bright but again they couldn’t put the ball on target and it was pretty messy from there. Joe Bell was subbed off with quarter of an hour left. Viking lost 1-0.

Up Next: Tuesday 25 May at 4am, away to Lillestrøm (NZT)

Greg Draper – The New Saints (Welsh Premier League)

TNS did what they needed to do in the final round. Despite a red card to Ryan Harrington after only twenty mins, they were already 1-0 up against Bala Town thanks to Ben Clark (10’) and Adrian Cieslewicz (54’) served up another for a 2-0 win. Greg Draper was subbed on for the final ten minutes. But Connah’s Quay also scored early and led the rest of the way as they beat Penybont 2-0 in their own final game and with that result they claim their second league title in a row, with TNC left to linger in second place which does at least earn them entry into the new UEFA Conference League. The third tier continental cup below the Champions League and Europa League.

It was the 0-0 draw against Connah’s Quay two weeks ago that cost them... that and also the goalless draw against Caernarfon Town the game prior. And the 4-1 loss to Connah’s Quay before that. Yeah, that late-April early-May stretch wasn’t kind... TNS had won seven in a row prior and won three in a row after but the damage was done. Greg Draper finished with 14 goals from 30 appearances (11 starts, 19 as a sub), which is actually his lowest goal haul since 2015-16. He misses out on his ninth Welsh Premier League title by two mere points.

Greg Draper, before the last game: “It would be massive, last season was hugely disappointing having the league title taken away from us. We feel there was still a long way to go, it was a real disappointment the way it all worked out last season. We’ve only got ourselves to blame this season for the position we are in. We have dopped points in the crucial games. We look back to Connah’s Quay at home where they completely battered us 4-1 and deserved the three points. Following that, Caernarfon at home where we drew 0-0, I missed a penalty aswell. If Penybont do us a favour on Saturday and take points off Connah’s Quay and we do our job it would be a great achievement. Whoever wins it this season thoroughly deserves it whichever way it goes.”

Up Next: Not much

Hunter Ashworth – San Diego Loyal (American USL Championship)

Another addition to the USL Crew, get in there. Hunter Ashworth, a kiwi youth international at U17, U20 & U23 level (who grew up in the States), joining San Diego Loyal where his coach will be some bloke called Landon Donovan (you may have heard of him) who once upon a time won the Golden Ball at the 1999 U17 World Cup held in Aotearoa. Scored against New Zealand in the opening game in fact. So that’s cool.

Ashworth played for Pittsburg Riverhounds at the same level last year but only played four games and was released at the end of the year. The 23 year old therefore rocked up in San Diego and has done enough to earn a contract. Beautiful stuff. The Loyal were an expansion team in 2020 and are one of those USL teams with big intentions. They should have arguably made the playoffs in their inaugural season but missed out due to back to back forfeits – refusing to continue in one game after a racial slur against one player and then the next week after a homophobic slur against another. Landon Donovan’s not only the coach, he’s also the executive vice-president of soccer operations, a co-owner, and a co-founder. Busy man. He’s also a fan of Hunter Ashworth.

Landon Donovan: “Hunter has come in and proven that he wants to be an SD Loyal player. He competes extremely hard every day and represents the values of our club. We are thrilled to have him join our team.”

Hunter Ashworth: “I’m very proud to be a part of this club. Previously, from an outsider's perspective, it was a place any player would want to be. Now to be a part of it, I feel very blessed and am excited to give all I have for the team. I can’t wait to put the Loyal Kit on and see what it means to the people and city of San Diego. It’s an honour to have this opportunity to represent the badge.”

Ashworth went straight into the starting eleven for his club debut later on the same day on which he was signed, that one was away to Tacoma Defiance. But he was hooked at the half with his team down 1-0. They’d equalise soon after the resumption though ended up losing 3-1. That’s three losses from three for San Diego to kick off their year. Ah well.

Up Next: Louisville City, away on Sunday at 11.30am (NZT)

James Musa, Noah Billingsley & Deklan Wynne – Phoenix Rising (American USL Championship)

Does Deklan Wynne not get invited to these things or what? He hasn’t even made a matchday squad yet either so not sure what’s going on there. No official updates so just gotta hang back. It’d appear he’s injured or unavailable which would at least explain why he wasn’t a part of the haka rendition given he wouldn’t have travelled for the away trip.

As for the latest effort, Phoenix were again unchanged so Noah Billingsley had to play off the bench – he came on in the 65th minute but wasn’t able to turn things all the way around for his team against the Tampa Bay Rowdies – who the Rising would have faced in the USL Championship final last year as the winners of the other conference but that game was cancelled due to covid stuff. An early own goal followed by a concession on the hour mark had them down by a couple and though Santi Moar pulled one back they still went down 2-1. First blemish of their season. Full game for Musa.

Up Next: Phoenix vs Las Vegas Lights, Sunday at 2.30pm (NZT)

Nikko Boxall – SJK (Finnish Veikkausliiga)

After two straight draws to begin things, SJK have their first win. They beat Oulu 2-0 away from home. Goals for Joonas Lepistö (53’) and Jake Jervis (61’) while Nikko Boxall got himself a yellow card on the way to that clean sheet. SJK missed a penalty inside the first ten minutes and in the second half had a goal disallowed for offside too but those didn’t matter in the end. Lovely stuff.

Up Next: Up against the big dogs HJK on Sunday at 2am... a Logan Rogerson debut there would be nice (NZT)

Erin Nayler – Reading FC (English Super League)

Season’s over like it never began... Erin Nayler’s move to the WSL seemed like a great one at the time but she was never able to oust standout Irish keeper Grace Moloney and rotation was apparently not a concept in vogue at Reading this season. Nayler played one game: a 3-0 EFL Cup defeat to West Ham back in November.

Now to the shock of nobody she’s on the move again. Nayler’s one of a nine players who will be leaving Reading now that the campaign’s done and dusted. Ranging from a couple academy grads seeking more minutes to squadies like Nayler to a starting player like Angharad James (who is joining Abby Erceg in North Carolina) to retiring club legend Fara Williams.

Manager Kelly Chambers: “I am so grateful to all of the players. Some of them have been with us for a very long time, like Lauren and Molly, and their contribution and dedication to the team has been fantastic. Each one of them – regardless of if they have made a hundred appearances or were squad players that hadn’t had many minutes – were a huge part of the team and always gave everything, which is all I could ever ask of them. We are a unit and it is always sad to see players go, but I wish each and every one of them well in whatever their next steps are. This season has been inconsistent for us to say the least, and one we have to learn a lot from. We do have highlights from 2020-21 which include us holding the distinction of being the first side to defeat Manchester United at Leigh Sports Village in over a year. Recruitment has been going on for a while now as I need to make sure that I mould a first team squad capable of pushing us higher in the league. We have traditionally always competed up there and we need to work hard to get back there.”

Up Next: That good old Olympic shop window

Liberato Cacace – Sint-Truiden (Belgian Pro League)

Up Next: It’s the offseason so whatever, more videos maybe

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