Man… that kinda sucked. Sloppy at the back, overrun in the middle and couldn’t hardly get a thing going in attack. Too many long balls, not enough controlled possession. Some dumb mistakes and some terrible touches. That’s not the way they should be playing this close to the Confederations Cup.

The Belarus game was a great opportunity to snatch a good result and send the All Whites marching on into the Confeds with some confidence. Instead they’ll hit up Russia on the back of two friendly matches, both 1-0 defeats. Weren’t even playing against the top XIs of either. The Northern Ireland defeat was excusable enough so early in their preparations, especially with a much better second half to build upon, but this game in Minsk… that was pretty bloody mediocre.

It started beautifully. Some sharp passing, moving the ball at a real pace, and Marco Rojas was able to slip the ball inside for Kip Colvey who squared across the goal and Chris Wood couldn’t quite catch up with it. A glorious chance to take an early lead with what woulda been a fantastic goal but instead it rolls past the far post. A dude of Woody’s quality probably should’ve caught up with that, probably should’ve made it 1-0 inside a few minutes. Three minutes into the game you figure no worries, just bury the next one. Well, the next one was a long time in coming.

Should mention there were three changes from the Northern Ireland game. Shane Smeltz came in for Clayton Lewis, leaving Bill Tuiloma on the bench. Smeltz up front with Wood, Thommo back into the midfield with Wee Mac, and Rojas dropping behind the strikers. Considering how Tuiloma changed the game in Belfast that was a strange one. He did play 90 minutes against Cabinteely FC so it could be a matter of rest but you’d have thought they’d wanna play as close to their top team as possible here, so close to Russia. Strange one there.

Even for Smeltz, too. This was the first time he’d started alongside Wood for Hudson, though Rory Fallon has played a similar role a couple times and Wood tends not to ever be subbed off so Smeltz has played besides him from the bench a few times. Elsewhere Deklan Wynne came in for Tommy Doyle, a straight swap, while Themi Tzimopoulos replaced Tommy Smith (Boxall playing LCB, Themi at RCB). The rest was as expected.

Why no Tommy Smith? Well the initial fear was an injury but it turns out he got married on the weekend. Obviously venue hire can be a bit of a bitch at the best of times but this was some… unusual timing. At least he’s not injured. At least he only missed a friendly. You know there are folks out there who won’t exactly shrug this off though… why don’t NZ Footy ever clarify this stuff in advance so we know?

A slight clarification:

Belarus made nine changes from the team that beat Bulgaria in their World Cup qualifier 2-1 the other day. They were still much better. After that initial threat, the All Whites then settled into an error-filled and conservative style of play like they’ve flaunted in their worst moments. Deep crosses and long balls like Chris Wood is just supposed to bring the ball down perfectly on his chest and smash it in from distance despite pressure from all sides. Nah, he’s at his best when you can GET THE BALL TO HIS FEET and there was no sign of that. Shane Smeltz also likes the ball at his feet and the potential there for some real creative stuff was wasted as they could barely link together.

Keeping it a hunnid (we always do at TNC), Woody deserves some criticism here. He captained the side and it seemed like he led by example in playing within himself. There were times he should have been a little more desperate, more enthusiastic in leading that press and he didn’t. You can see why a striker would get into that habit when he’s having the ball hoofed at his head thirty times a game but we need more from him. His missed chance early on kinda reflected that and he had another chance right at the end of the first half where he took a beauty down on his chest but his second touch was too soft and the defender recovered to clear it. Probably should a smashed it without the extra touch.

At least Stefan Marinovic was in good nick. After missing a yuck one against the Norners for their goal he had to make a few tough saves in Belarus and was generally up to the task. Even plucked one that took a deflection of Boxall which looked like a mirror image of Liam Boyce’s goal for NIR.

Yet while Mari was doing his business, the midfield and defence were getting messy. Some shocking passing - Wee Man and Boxall most to blame there - kept the pressure on and without the patience or technique to hold the ball under pressure they either gave it away or kicked it deep… which was effectively giving it away too. Just lucky that Maksim Skavish buggered up when he got one on one with Marinovic ten minutes in.

Belarus were the team winning corners, beating defenders, looking like scoring. Hudson’s Heroes held on until half-time but there were no changes at the break and it only took a couple minutes before they went behind. Conceded a corner straight away, the corner was cut back to the edge of the box where a looping cross by Ihar Burko (who was great all game) to the far post was stabbed in by Dzianis Paliakou. NZF’s match report calls it a “superb finish”. A ridiculous bit of defending would be as accurate. No marking here, no marking there, no marking anywhere.

The one bloke in close to him is Shane Smeltz. Not usually what you’d judge a striker on but his defence on the many Belarus set pieces was a weak link. This wasn’t the only time he was beaten.

Huddo turned to the bench after that, on came Monty Patterson and Bill Tuiloma. Switch flicked for their new 4-2-2-2 shape, with Rojas and Patterson floating behind Smeltz and Wood (Themi had already pushed into a deeper midfield role late in the first half for a back four but with the same shape elsewhere – all that really did was shrink the defence and force Colvey and Wynne further back in coverage).

Here’s the thing though, nothing much changed. We still gave away silly fouls panicking without the ball and we still looked to pump it long. Even after Kosta Barbarouses came on for Smeltz nothing changed, though Kosta’s speed and energy did set up the best chance of the second half for NZ, challenging the keeper on a Woody flicked header (one finally worked!). Wynne cut back the loose ball to Wood who struck it well but a wonderful diving block from Mikita Korzun sent it over the bar.

And as time ran out they didn’t get any smarter about it, only more free kicks kicked high into the box to no effect. The Belarus defence were good in the air, they were getting the better of the high ones in both penalty areas (Mari made one save from a strong header, while another dropped over the bar). It was stupid, really. Dumb to watch, even dumber considering the 4am kickoff in NZ time.

This was a wasted opportunity to win a game away from home, something that Hudson has had trouble with in his time. This was his 19th game in charge. Of those, two have been played in Aotearoa and both were 2-0 victories. They’ve won four and lost one (to Mexico) on neutral ground (the other Nations Cup games). The rest have come on their opponent’s turf and Huddo’s record is two wins, five draws and five defeats. Disturbingly they took a step back in performance between this game and the Northern Irish game and even worse is that they’ve hardly looked like scoring in either. Two poor goals to concede to, both early in halves. A rubbish performance here and the whole context of this tour has changed. That’s the thing about progress: it’s better when you make it.

Nobody cares about the Cabinteely game. Which means we’ve seen three out of four halves where this team has been properly bad. That’s not a pleasant sign given what’s on the horizon. Tommy Smith’s return should settle some of that defensive stuff but it’s hard to see this team scoring at the Confeds playing anything close to how they did here.

Of course, if they beat Russia then nobody will care about a friendly loss to Belarus in the slightest. And a 1-0 defeat with a couple half-chances and an avoidable goal conceded against Portugal would probably be considered a great result. They’re expected to get dominated there so some of what we’ve seen these two games will be buried by a complete void of possession. After two hours of lost sleep spent watching Chris Wood jump up and down while everyone else watches, that’s not such a bad prospect right now.

Take a look at this trash. Witness the space in which Ryan Thomas receives this ball out on the left. Does he carry it down the line into that space? Does look for the overlap of Deklan Wynne or try work a one-two with Shane Smeltz? Maybe wait for Mike McGlinchey to come over in support? Nope, he cuts back in and lobs it towards the penalty area. Utterly wasteful.

A team in control playing this formation, you should see options in possession like that but the All Whites struggled for space the whole time. So they’d work the ball back across the defence and down the other flank, as is the custom, except their passing was crap enough that by the time they worked it over the space had closed. Belarus worked way harder and played with far more ambition. They should have won by more.

And, to be honest, if the last friendly showed that Tuiloma needs to start then this one showed that Smeltz really can’t. Not alongside Wood, anyway. Uncle Tony’s lot needs all they can get in Russia and allowing other teams to build up smoothly from the back in the way that they’re not ain’t part of that. Rojas or Barbarouses bring much more mobility there alongside Woody, who apparently isn’t gonna be the one to pressure defenders. Having two static strikers is silly. At least they worked that one out now before the tournament.

At least this whole damn game came before the tournament.

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