Mourinho’s Notebook – English Seceding, The Mighty Bhutan & Some Family Dramas
Is England Even In Europe Anymore?
Not in terms of football it ain’t. Every English team in both the Champions League and Europa League have now been eliminated, Everton the last pin to fall as they lost 5-2 away to Dynamo Moscow.
This after Chelsea and Arsenal both fell on away goals in the Champions League round of 16 and Manchester City were overwhelmed by a mighty Barcelona at the same stage. Arsene Wenger formulated his frustration into an attack on the antiquated away goals system, Mourinho was nice and reserved, Pellegrini looks like he’s waiting at death’s door and the vast array of punditry in Ol’ Blighty let rip with no mercy.
Here’s the complete list of British players still competing in European competition:
- Gareth Bale (Real Madrid)
- Micah Richards (Fiorentina)
It’s like the old days, back when the United Kingdom was still a kingdom and wanted nothing to do with the rest of Europe. Like the early days of football when England refused to compete with the philistines of the rest of the planet in the first few world cups.
On a completely unrelated note, here’s the latest England squad.
The Mighty Bhutan
A tiny Himalayan nation of 750,000 people. The world’s worst team according to FIFA rankings. But watch out, Russia 2018, because Bhutan has high ambitions.
This week was historic for Bhutan football and for the nation itself. They won their first ever competitive game, beating Sri Lanka in the opening leg of qualifying for the next round of Asian World Cup spots. An 84th minute winner from Tshering Dorji earned a 1-0 win in Colombo.
Up until that time, Bhutan had only ever won 3 games in its history. Their last international was in 2013, a 5-2 loss to this same opposition, and they once lost 20-0 to Kuwait in Asian Cup qualifying (back in 2000).
That set up a huge second leg in Bhutan a couple days ago. All state employees and students were granted a half-holiday for the big game. Orange and yellow flooded the stadium in the form of flags and jerseys and balloons. A group coordinated what is thought to be the country's first ever Mexican wave. Chants of “Bhutan, Bhutan” rained down. The ground played the wrong national anthem (whoops). Ninety minutes later they had earned a 2-1 victory, 3-1 on aggregate, and now advance to the next round for the first time ever.
Go, the mighty Bhutan!
ZLATAN IS MAD!
And when Zlatan is mad, we start reporting.
Mr Ibrahimovic got mightily upset on the weekend over some refereeing decisions in PSG’s 3-2 loss to Bordeaux. Video was captured post-game of a ranting, shirtless Zlatan screaming in English against the officiating.
The key sentence being: “I’ve been playing for 15 years and I’ve never seen [good] refereeing in this shit country.”
Yeah, that’s gotten him into some hot water with French nationalists, with some politicians calling for Zlatan to leave France if he feels that way about it. An apology from the Swedish striker was soon forthcoming.
Family Ties
Two nations, both alike in dignity, in fair Lazio, where we lay our scene…
Lazio defender Abdoulay Konko turned down the chance to do what all young footballers dream of, representing his country. The reason? He couldn’t choose which country.
See, Konko was born in France, but to a Senegalese father and Moroccan mother. Meaning he’s eligible for all three. And he has revealed that he’s rejected call-ups from both Senegal and Morocco in order to keep both sides of his family happy.
“I've been called by Morocco and Senegal but I respectfully turned them down because I wouldn't want to hurt either of my parents by choosing one over the other. It's a tough decision because you don't want to create tension in the family so I decided to stay neutral.”
“To some it sounds like a lazy excuse, but I love my parents and I prefer to spare them the agony of backlash from disappointed fans. If I had chosen Senegal, fans from Morocco will definitely criticise my decision, same for disappointed Senegalese, so it's a no-win situation”
Argh, Mum!
One Norwich fan certainly did not get what he wanted for dinner this week. Mikey Knights came home one day to find his mother had accidentally cooked 16 tickets to the Canaries game with Brighton.
It seems she somehow picked up the envelope of tickets with the chicken she was preparing, both ending up in the oven to roast. It was one of those roast-in-the-bag birds, which had been sitting on top of the envelope, having been left there by Mr Knights. When he dropped by that night for dinner, he was presented with 16 blackened, charred tickets, having spent 40 minutes on high.
Luckily the club were kindhearted enough to offer replacements.
Juan Mata’s Artistic Recommendations
This from his weekly blog.
“Before signing off I would like to recommend to those who come to Manchester a visit to the Whitworth Art Gallery. I went there a few days ago and I was really surprised by some of Cai Guo-Qiang’s works and his drawing technique using gunpowder. Overall, this is a very interesting and well-designed museum.”
Social Media Stunners
Masch called it. Tipping off which way Aguero would kick before Ter Stegen saved it.
