The Wildcard’s Premier League Predictions - Week 22
Last Week: 2/10
Overall: 85/210
Tottenham Hotspur vs Sunderland
Sunday 1.45am
On one hand it feels like we can only go backwards from a refreshing round of FA Cup action followed by a midweek matinee that featured a few big shocks and a couple of the very best games of a really great season. On the other hand, why the hell can’t it continue?
This one’s for Jermain Defoe, up against his old team after whipping a hatty past ten-man Swansea. Who knew he still had it in him? One of the few old pro strikers still bagging goals wherever he goes, a guy who could slot a solid 10-15 goals for any club in England. The eleventh all-time top Premier League scorer:
- Alan Shearer – 260
- Wayne Rooney – 190
- Andy Cole – 187
- Frank Lampard – 177
- Thierry Henry – 175
- Robbie Fowler – 163
- Michael Owen – 150
- Les Ferdinand – 149
- Teddy Sheringham – 146
- Robin Van Persie – 144
- Jermain Defoe – 134
You’d assume Rooney has a real shot at reaching Shearer’s record, what with him only being 30 years old and all that – though you do wonder if his is a career suited to longevity (my theory is that he moves back to Everton for a few years before he retires). Remember there was also a time when the thought of Michael Owen not breaking 200 PL goals seemed about as ridiculous as the thought of him someday playing for Manchester United. Robin Van Persie ended further back than he should have too, even if he was clearly on the decline last year it’s looking like a mistake to have let him go by LVG. How much would United love a clinical finisher right about now?
Anyway, this isn’t about them, this is about a Spurs team that lost to Leicester City despite mostly dominating the game. You can never completely dominate Leicester City but Spurs had more chances and should have found a way through. They almost did, but for that
A) Fantastic
B) Instinctive
C) Fortuitous
D) Offside
save by Kasper Schmeichel. Poor Harry Kane looked like… well, a typical Spurs fan, really, after that one. The Foxes have a way of doing that to you.
But let’s be honest, those were two top five teams (maybe even two top fours if Man United and Liverpool keep dropping points) and Sunderland’s win over Swansea was a relegation battle. I’m pretty confident in saying that Spurs are gonna win this one, probably by a spare couple of goals, and as such I will be setting Harry Kane as my fantasy captain. Possibly even triple captain because otherwise I’ll forget to use that thing at all.
Wildcard’s Pick: Spurs 3-0
Newcastle United vs West Ham United
Sunday 4.00am
None of the other relegation threatened teams seem to have Newcastle’s ability to sneak a result against the good teams. There are no throwaway games for a team like that, which once again makes you wonder how exactly they find themselves in this debacle. They won’t go down, not from what I’ve seen. It’s just a matter of getting the results that they should be against those teams around them. Check this out so far against last season’s top four:
- 0-0 vs Man United (A)
- 0-1 vs Arsenal (H)
- 2-2 vs Chelsea (H)
- 1-6 vs Man City (A)
- 0-1 vs Arsenal (A)
- 3-3 vs Man United (H)
There are plenty of teams with worse records than that, no wins but they were in every single one of those games barring a 20 minute barrage by Sergio Aguero with a five-for. Two things from that: Why are they not able to get over the line in close games? And why are they not able to take this form into other games? Again, the exception being that City game where they bounced back with a 6-2 win over Norwich – from only six shots on target. I put a lot of blame at the striking situation there, with 21 year old Aleksandar Mitrovic asked to carry a lot of weight (not only his own) immediately after a big step up from Belgian football and with a known habit of getting a little temperamental. Papiss Cisse, when he’s played, hasn’t looked half the player he’s been in the past and the slow settling of Siem de Jong and Florian Thauvin haven’t helped. They’re playing one striker with another dude hanging behind him but they’ve nobody to cross the ball in or stretch the defence to create holes through the middle. Daryl Janmaat has been their best wide player and he’s a fullback. So, no, I’m not convinced that signing a couple of good midfielders solves their issues (a spare centre back wouldn’t go astray either) but at least it’s a sign of intent.
Meanwhile West Ham have been the smartest transfer schemers of all recently. Almost every one of their summer signings have contributed in some positive way. The trick now is not to get shifty and feel they have to keep spending because the last thing you want is to upset the balance in a group of players who have really impressed with how many reserves have been able to fill in for injured starters. And now most of those injured starters are back. Seems like the longest current unbeaten streak in the league (WHU – three straight wins and eight without a loss) shouldn’t be threatened here. Then again, the old standard: Newcastle are due.
Wildcard’s Pick: Sitting on the fence with 1-1
Chelsea vs Everton
Sunday 4.00am
Yes, great game here. This should be a fun one. Everton may be down in eleventh place but they’re only eight points off fourth and Chelsea are only four points behind them now, what with their five game unbeaten run. Three draws in that, still it’s better than what Jose’s lot were doing. Chelsea aren’t gonna be completely clear of that whole situation until the exorcist gets back from NZ Football and can finally do his thing. I mean, I never thought they needed to move away from Mourinho’s dark shadow in the first place, write this season off and prepare for a resurgence next time, but so it goes these days.
A man to watch: Muhamed Besic has been brilliant recently. The dude looks like an Eastern European hitman and yet he brings some wicked skill and clever passing to his football. Not to mention he’s every bit the enforcer that he looks. If Nemanja Matic (who’s fallen behind Jon Obi Mikel in the pecking order under Hiddink) had played a little more like Besic did in the two recent games against City (0-0 in the PL and 2-1 in the League Cup semi) then maybe that man Jose would still have a job. Mo Besic, as they’re calling him, is already a fan favourite for his penchant for a powerful tackle. He signed last season but like I was saying with Mitrovic it takes time to adjust to a higher level, especially in a new country. With James McCarthy out for the rest of the month he has the chance to show Bobby Martinez something he cannot refuse. And I’m not talking about a Man United loanee either because he’s been known to be keen on a few of those in the past.
Wildcard’s Pick: 1-1
Manchester City vs Crystal Palace
Sunday 4.00am
Lose to Aston Villa the game before you travel to play Manchester City. Nice one, dickheads.
Even though they were held 0-0 by Everton (missing a chance, as it played out, to gain a couple points on Arsenal), City looked really good for the most part. Defended stoutly, Otamendi did a good job on Lukaku, they got another controlling Yaya performance and the forwards looked sharp and poised. It just didn’t come off, as sometimes will happen. Kevin de Bruyne didn’t have a good game but the rest of them were pretty threatening. I’m gonna throw it out there that Raheem Sterling isn’t getting nearly the credit he deserves for so flawlessly stepping up to a champion team after his awful time of it (off the field) last season. That ain’t easy to do. Bubba’s never gonna be a top finisher but he’s a master at wrong-footing defenders.
Wildcard’s Pick: City 2-0
Bournemouth vs Norwich City
Sunday 4.00am
The old promoted teams/relegation battle, aye? It’s never an easy thing, establishing a foothold in the Premier League. Some teams strike lucky and immediately post up in the mid-table masses while others take years of fighting off the impending drop before they can feel safe enough to plan higher. Safe to say that each of these teams would sign right away on the dotted line if you offered them seventeenth place.
Yup, right there on the dotted line…
Wildcard’s Pick: 0-0
Southampton vs West Bromwich Albion
Sunday 4.00am
Nice win against Watford (albeit a Watford team with Craig Cathcart on the bench until the 72nd min for no apparent reason – tiredness maybe?). Good to see the Saints play like they ought to and especially good to see Fraser Forster back in action. Not enough to make me think they’ll rise above mid-table by the time the dust settles, though. Same goes for West Brom, who twice pegged back Chelsea and don’t we love ‘em for it. These are two middling teams with strong defences and that’s exactly what I expect to see here.
We’re also back in the territory of ‘Is This Saido Berahino’s Last Game For WBA?’, a conversation I fall firmly on the ‘Well Sell Him Then, If Ya Ain’t Gonna Play Him!’ side of things. Coming off the bench at best, that’s no way to live. Sucks for Saido but right now he’s like the Huell from Breaking Bad of the Premier League.
Wildcard’s Pick: 1-1
Aston Villa vs Leicester City
Sunday 6.30am
A win! Aston Villa got a win! Finally another three points, their first victory since opening weekend.
Aaaaand now back to losing ways, because there’s nothing Leicester love more than chaos and disorganisation. Villa have shown a few minor improvements of late but, like, no. Not enough to beat what we really need to start talking of as a serious title challenger. Or at least a Champions League challenger. I’m not tracking back any further on that claim (call me Eden Hazard).
Wildcard’s Pick: Foxes 3-1
Liverpool vs Manchester United
Monday 3.05am
THE WELSH XAVI? MORE LIKE THE SPANISH JOE ALLEN!
… actually, make that the Welsh Andrea Pirlo by the looks of it.
Meanwhile in Louis Van Gaal’s next press conference:
Liverpool go through a patch where they can’t seem to score goals and they then host Arsenal without a striker in the line-up. Manchester United barely scrape by Sheffield United in the Cup and travel to a Newcastle team coming off four straight 1-0 defeats. And hey presto, alakazam, how about potentially the two most exciting games of the season so far!
Absolute mayhem, late goals and stunners, drama all around. If it can only play through into this one then we’ve a modern classic on our hands. But I kinda doubt it. Too much baggage between these two to sustain an open, flowing game. It’ll be Jurgen Klopp’s first taste of the biggest rivalry in English football, while for Louis Van Gaal he’ll wanna see his side recreate their best overall performance of the season – that 3-1 win over Liverpool at Old Trafford. Although that was against Brendan Rodgers so who knows what to expect here?
I do. Sort of. Liverpool like to crowd specific areas of the park in search of the ball while United like to spread their players evenly across the field. Now that’s either gonna mean United are able to slice them open with clever switches of play and disciplined positioning… or that Liverpool will be able to tear through the backline with clever one-twos and overloads. Might be a good opportunity for LVG to give his 5-4-1 formation another go, I really liked that against Swansea and I’m not sure why it didn’t stick. Eh, I’ve given up waiting for Van Gaal to take my messages, my only selection hope is that he doesn’t pick Treebeard Fellaini again to take three touches instead of one and give away six fouls a game.
Here’s a fun fact:
MUFC when Marouane Fellaini plays: W2, D4, L5
MUFC when Marouane Fellaini doesn’t: W7, D3, L0
And he definitely didn’t help his case by pumping an open header straight at the keeper against Newcastle with either side of the goal to aim for and his team up 3-2. Woulda surely killed the game off had he shown more composure and picked his spot, rather than going for power.
I reckon Liverpool’s gegenpressing-lite has the advantage here, so long as the fitness holds in an already stretched squad. Yet I’m not ready to count out a resurgent Wayne Rooney against the Scousers, four goals in three games and he was my man of the match against Newcastle.
Wildcard’s Pick: 1-1, in the recent trend
Stoke City vs Arsenal
Monday 5.15am
Everyone’s loving the Stoke-Alona evolution but the 3-1 win over Norwich (one of only two games I picked right midweek – the other being Arsenal’s draw with Liverpool, cheers to Joe Pirlo) was the first time they’d scored three times in a game since that legendary 6-1 win over Liverpool in Steven Gerrard’s last game. What an occasion… What a memory…
Huh? Predictions? Oh, right. Yeah.
Umm, so Arsenal couldn’t hold the lead against Liverpool but they also showed good sorts in coming from behind twice. Simon Mignolet doesn’t get all the blame, there was some scintillating stuff in there on attack, the hesitation pass from Joel Campbell to Theo before Olly Giroud’s Miss of the Season was sublime. It’s hard to say with that guy, is his recent form a sign that all those loans were worthwhile or a sign that he could have been in there doing this two years ago? Like all great two-sided dilemmas, the answer probably lies somewhere in between. The important thing is that he is playing fantastic footy right now.
And so is the rest of the Arsenal team. With Mohamed Elneny all locked up and a chance to play in this very game, the midfield should get back to the standard it needs to be at (Arteta and Flamini are placeholders at best) for a sustained title run. I’m not too worried for them over dropping those two points, especially not with City also drawing. I’d also wager that Elneny will be the only new face at the Emirates this January.
Traditionally Stoke have been hailed as the anti-Arsenal. Not any longer. And that isn’t gonna do their chances of victory here all too many favours, the Gunners do love a more expansive opposition after all. Plus a title team always bounces back after any points left begging. Am I putting too much pressure on them?
Wildcard’s Pick: Arsenal 2-1
Swansea City vs Watford
Tuesday 9.00am
Always love a Tuesday game to finish a round, though I’ll be honest this isn’t the most enticing. I’ve been riding the Watford bandwagon so that’s all sweet but following Swansea’s capitulation against Sunderland I’m now officially worried for the Premier League’s Welsh connection.
Wildcard’s Pick: 2-1 Watford