Napier City Rovers vs Wellington Olympic

Saturday arvo in sunny Napier, never a bad way to start a game week. Napier City Rovers off the back of their first loss, going down 3-0 away to Auckland City, they made two alterations to that team with Kaeden Atkins returning along with James Mack, given that Liam Schofield and Cam Emerson were both unavailable. Sweet as. Wellington Olympic gave Theo Ettema the start in midfield while Connor Gaul partnered Kailan Gould (a commentator’s nightmare lol) in support of Gianni Bouzoukis a little higher up. Jesse Randall moved to wing-back to accommodate that. You will not find a more attacking WB pairing than Jack-Henry Sinclair and Jesse Randall (12 goal contributions between them, get that into ya – and that was before this game).

It was Gaul who swung his boot through the first shot in anger, swirling it past the post. Olympic had won their last three games by a combined score of 9-0 so no surprises to see them moving the ball around swiftly from the opening whistle. Alex Palezevic hit a long ball so good that both Sinclair and Bouzoukis were through in behind... but Sinclair’s square pass was nixed by Bill Robertson, the player-coach making that recovery sprint to save a goal. Atkins also charged down a Sinclair effort.

If you didn’t already know, NCR are a very solid defensive team. Twenty minutes into this one they continued to prove that... in fact once they got comfortable they even started to work a few things on attack as well with Ettema having to swoop in to stop Leaford Allen from striking after Christian Leopard drew in two defenders and flicked on a header. Before much longer they upped the ante and won a penalty. Jonny McNamara ran across Tor Davenport-Petersen and got his legs clipped. To be honest it’s hard to see what TDP actually did wrong other than existing in corporeal form. There was contact but he never changed his line or stuck a foot out. Seemed incidental but okay. Fergus Neil took the penalty. Fergus Neil scored the penalty. Napier City with the shock 1-0 lead... the first goal the Greeks had conceded for 299 minutes. In this competition that’s basically a lifetime.

Wasn’t long before Kaeden Atkins headed a corner into the ground and over either. But you know what they say about waking a sleeping dog. Particularly a bulldog, aka Kailan Gould who played a wondrous ball down the middle of the NCR defence which Connor Gaul ran onto, too much speed, and he buried that sucker. All it took was four minutes to get back level. Then two minutes after that old mate Gianni Bouzoukis slipped in behind and onto a Sinclair cross – those two combining yet again – to nudge the Greeks in front. Well alright then.

On 33’ Jesse Randall swatted a free kick from out on the left edge, somehow ghosting it through the crowd and into the far side of the net. 3-1 to Olympic. For about a minute at least, until the ref consulted with his mate and decided there was an offside obstruction in there. Not the first time that rule has hurt Olympic... it wouldn’t be the last call that went against them this half either. Because after Bouzoukis pushed a shot wide and Randall had one blocked by Fetuao Belcher and Gaul fizzed past the post... they ended the half with ten men. Tam Dimairo took out Leaford Allen. Definite foul. But a last man tackle? Not too sure about that one. However the red card did at least make for a curious second stanza.

Nathanael Hailemariam came on at HT to shore things up with some more experience in the middle. Olympic were still leading after all. Rovers came out swinging... but soon enough Davenport-Petersen was thumping a shot on target for Oscar Mason to deflect away and then eight mins into the spell a high ball into the breeze from Sinclair caught Mason in two minds. Bouzoukis latched onto it and then set up Randall for the easy goal. This one counted for Randall. 3-1 for real.

Rovers were still up against ten men though. And Leaford Allen is still a monster of a man, capable of shrugging off a unit like Palezevic and charging through on goal... although Scott Basalaj made an excellent save on that occasion. Andrew Abba and Sam Lack were thrown on for NCR. Later Allen shrugged off TDP to launch a shot on target from distance. Then in the 68th minute he got that goal he was after. Funnily enough it was his pace this time, not his strength, as he dashed onto a Lack through ball. Gulley and Basalaj ran into each other as he took it past them. The rest was simple. 3-2 with a little over twenty remaining.

Leopard did punt one over the top, though the hard tackles were what stood out immediately after that goal. Sinclair and Abba collided in a high-speed crash, thankfully both dudes were okay. Then Olympic threw on Jonty Roubos with a dozen minutes left and literally the first thing he did was to break the offside trap (it was close... but the Greeks deserved a close call to go their way) and then open up his body to score a nicely taken goal.

Up the other end Basalaj got a foot on an Abba shot that was headed in. Followed by a one-hander on the line to deny Leopard from six yards, an outstanding save. And then Bouzoukis shifted a quick ball over to Roubos on the right and that fella sprinted through to score another one. 88th minute, lock it in. 5-2 to Wellington Olympic who even on a tricky day like this are still looking imperious.

Can’t argue with it. They played half a game with ten men, conceding a soft penalty and having a goal of their own disallowed late... and regardless they won it by three clear goals. Lost their clean sheet streak but scored more than enough anyway. A quieter game from Sinclair but Bouzoukis and Randall made up for that. Basalaj supplied some powerful stops. Davenport-Petersen was strong in the middle. Good yarns. Rovers still defended pretty well despite the score but that’s how it can be against a team like this. Glad to see Leaford Allen get underway with his first National League goal. That dude is a handful and a half.

Wellington Phoenix Reserves vs Miramar Rangers

Always as much fun to see the WeeNix’s team naming as anyone’s because there’s that lingering chance of a professional player or two. Here there were two. Finn Surman had been on the bench for every Nix game in both the A-League and the FFA Cup without getting a minute of action this season. He took a week off from that in order to log ninety for the reserves and joining him was left back Lucas Mauragis who’d played for the ressies last week. Backing up. Noah Karunaratne also returned having been on the bench along with Surman for the previous ALM match. Riley Bidois was in that wider squad too and he started here as well. Everything else was the identical to the group that whupped Christchurch United 3-1 (thanks in large part to an early red for CU).

Miramar Rangers weren’t bothered, they just wanted to get that first win of the season. Tough run of fixtures so far combined with a lot of player turnover in getting to this part of the year. In that quest they picked Patrick Tobin at right back. He was one change from a narrow 1-0 loss to Auckland United. The other change was midfielder Saul Milovanovic being out, thus Max Falconer got the start in the centre. Note that very experienced, very talented front three of Andy Bevin, Hamish Watson, and Sam Mason-Smith.

Tough yarns for Finn Surman because the first time he was called into proper action it was against Sam Mason-Smith who held him off with some Grown Man Physicality before smashing a half-volley on target which Alby Kelly-Heald tipped over. AKH didn’t look entirely comfortable with that save but he did the trick. He’ll be wishing he could have the next few seconds back though because bloody hell Jorge Akers curled that ball directly in from the resulting corner. A very early lead for Miramar Rangers at a very soggy Fraser Park (a few great shots of the cameraman’s hankie wiping off the lens).

Hamish Watson is a baller so when he saw AKH off his line after ten mins he didn’t hesitate to try his luck from almost halfway and if he’d kept his shot a little lower he probably would’ve had a magical goal. Roof of the net took the impact instead. Otherwise, to be fair, the WeeNix were moving the ball alright through the midfield. Dan McKay popped one on target from distance. The Phoenix have usually been the team with the quick starts this season so they were in a strange position but they didn’t panic. In fact a super deep cross from Charlie Beale probably should’ve had them back on evens after 15 mins but Kaelin Nguyen headed wide.

However Wilson Souphanthavong was giving Lucas Mauragis fits down the left side and 18 mins in he stole the ball of LM after a heavy touch, charged his way down to the byline, then squared for Sam Mason-Smith to tap in an easy conversion. Make that 2-0 to Miramar Rangers, not a bad way to get going when chasing your first win of the campaign. In all honesty though, these were two soft goals for the Nix to allow.

Miramar Rangers only moulded into this back four shape last week presumably as a response to their poor start (and limited player options having lost a heap of dudes overseas or to injuries since the winter campaign). Yet watching them stay compact and shut down what the Nix were working towards made it seem like they’d been playing this way all along. Liam Wood and Josh Rogerson doing excellently. Joe Chiari was getting heaps of touches in the Rangers half as right back for WP but was barely able to advance it from there. Charlie Beale did push an effort wide from a Mauragis feed off a slick counter. But not much else.

Hey you wanna see one of the best goals you’re likely to see in any football game for a very long time? You do? Yeah sweet, here’s Sam Mason-Smith...

The WeeNix’s problem this National League has been second halves. So far their HT scores have been 0-0 (lost 1-0), 2-1 (drew 2-2), 0-0 (drew 1-1) and 3-1 (won 3-1). Five of their six goals coming not only inside 45 minutes but actually inside 30 minutes. That was gonna have to change in a hurry if they were going to have any chance of salvaging this match... so on came Fin Conchie at the break with Chiari going off and Sheridan moving to RB.

Mason-Smith had the first shot of the half, Kelly-Heald scooping it up low. There was a clash between Dan McKay and Hamish Watson which led to both fellas needing some cleaning up. Watto returned with bandages all over his head like he was heading to a Halloween party dressed as Boris Karloff’s The Mummy.

Meanwhile the Wellington Phoenix did get a swift goal back. Matt Sheridan with a cross smashed low to the near post and Riley Bidois with the brushed touch home. Bang bang. Sheridan making an instant impact on the right and Bidois rediscovering his scoring touch after a few frustrating ones had eluded him recently.

That was also the one of the few instances where either defence had been broken through open play. The Miramar goals had all come by unusual methods, the two defences otherwise holding things down. Mauragis did sting a shot at the back post as the ball fell his way, for a split second that looked like another G for the Nixers... but Tobin stepped in with the block.

Another Mauragis overlap led to an appeal for a handball which was waved off. Then Mauragis picked out Bidois in the middle who fired on the spin but Tiahn Manuel made a brave block... Manuel’s brother Jackson is one of the top dudes in the Nix academy these days, having played a few times for the A-League team (only seen him once this NL season so far), and it seemed that Tiahn had a point to prove. He was everywhere in that midfield. Did get booked for crunching Karunaratne though. Bit over the top.

If you’re wondering what Miramar got up to on attack in the second half... they didn’t. But that’s because they’d already scored their goals and only needed to make sure they didn’t let it slide at the other end. A few of those dangerous free kicks came to nothing. Liam Wood picked off a tricky cross. On came Ben Wallace and Adam Supyk for the Nix, with Josh Rudland following soon after. Attacking changes in search of goals. Still they were held at bay.

There was drama left in this game, don’t worry. Before that, a concern for Rangers as Scott Midgley had to be subbed off hurt with five to go. He was came on as a sub to mark his return from a knock and ended up going off as a sub with a knock. Hopefully mere precaution. Elsewhere Watson and Mason-Smith continued to do expert things holding the ball up and dragging things out. Then the drama... as Andy Bevin and Riley Bidois were both sent off in stoppage time for something entirely off the ball. Brouhaha in back play and after ref and assistant chatted it over the cards ran red. Neither player was expecting it. Don’t even know what happened other than some chest to chest yapping.

The WeeNix got a free kick from that incident and once they finally got the ball to sit stationary in the wind Mauragis smashed it into the wall. Still, they ended up with a corner and Ben Wallace smacked it in after the ball had bounced off Finn Surman. Two goals in two games for Wallace. No time left for anything else though, Miramar Rangers with the points thanks to a 3-2 victory.

Good mahi from Scotty Hales’ team who looked really well organised across the park. Hamish Watson and Sam Mason-Smith used all their experience up front while Liam Wood in particular had a blinder at the back. Tiahn Manuel was also great. They were able to muster up goals from random situations then they managed the game nicely in the second half. Not perfectly, but still nicely. Did what it took. For the Nix they were pretty solid through the middle with Finn Surman doing well, Dan McKay also. Lucas Mauragis had a poor start but once he started getting forward he was a menace. The attempted fight back was valiant but finishing and defensive errors remain an issue. As they so often are for players this age.

Auckland United vs Auckland City

When Auckland United was formed (as a merger between Three Kings and Onehunga Sports), they chose the name in part to help spark a wee rivalry with the dominant force in the region: Auckland City. And it might be working? Obviously the name’s got nothing to do with it (“a rose by any other name...”) but remember that Auckland United were the first, and entering this game still the only, team to beat Auckland City this year. City drew a game early in the year against Hamilton Wanderers. They drew more recently against Birkenhead in a thriller of a National League match a fortnight ago. But only one defeat: 36 games in all competitions with 33 wins, 2 draws, 1 loss.

United’s win was in the final round of the Northern League, long after City had wrapped up the title and only a week prior to the Chatham Cup final which was perhaps a distraction in a mostly meaningless league closer. Still lost though. 2-0 to AU with goals for Oliver Fay (44’) and Regont Murati (78’). Considering that we haven’t really seen the Navy Blues firing on all cylinders in this National League yet and this was a fixture worth circling.

Even more so because Jose Figueira, coach of Auckland United, used to be the bossman at Auckland City. Hence he probably knows a thing or two about their weaknesses. Hence it was very curious to see United stroll out with a back three, Billy Jones joining the usuals of Ross Haviland and Kurtis Mogg, while Andrew Blake moved to left wing-back (Reggie Murati on the right). Oliver Fay also returned in an attacking midfield role while fellow youngster Oliver Middleton maintained his spot from last time. Auckland City only made one change from the 3-0 win over Napier City last week and that was Dylan Manickum swapping into a number ten role in the midfield. That meant that Ryan De Vries and Cam Howieson were only on the bench.

Emiliano Tade didn’t waste much time in fizzing one wide from about 20 metres out... yet then all of a sudden Auckland United scored. They started off deep in their own half, Nic Zambrano advancing the ball and then shifting it wide to Andrew Blake. He hit Oli Fay on the underlap and Fay stung a cross over which intersected beautifully with the continuing run of Zambrano, who bunted it in. How good was that?

United were looking good, playing through that City press with a few other transitional attacks. It was only really the long balls where City could initially get anything going. Also a Mario Ilich header at the back stick from a corner. Fascinating start... then it got even crazier about thirteen minutes in when a flash of lightning and crack of thunder resonated in the distance and the heavens opened up and dumped rain all over Keith Hay Park. You know, just to really make extra funky.

Ross Haviland went into the book for going through Tade. Jordan Vale followed suit for clattering tackle of his own. Some Oli Fay sizzle sparked a lovely counter for AU, Reggie Murati hitting the side-netting. But perhaps in consequence of the weather we did settle down into much more of a midfield battle as the half went onwards and from there City slowly grew into the ascendency. Dylan Manickum drifted wide then angled in to find Kilkolly who whipped his shot wide. There were a couple of curlers from Tade. Mack Waite saved well from Gerard Garriga after he’d linked with Tade. Then just before the break that man Emiliano Tade scored a beauty of a strike and we were all tied up.

Stink timing for the home side but they shouldn’t have been too disheartened because their back three was operating beautifully. Jones, Haviland, and Mogg were keeping ACFC and their supreme forward line in front of them pretty much the whole time. Even the goal they conceded, it was a ripper from range. Never broke them down. Simply a great goal, can’t account for that. Although it did follow as a culmination of a period of increasing pressure that they were under so gotta avoid that happening again.

The fouls resumed as soon as the game did. Murati stung the palms of Conor Tracey as Auckland United certainly levelled things back out. Clear chances were scarce in the continuing rain. Auckland City went to their bench ten mins into the spell with Aidan Carey brought on. United needed to replace Haviland after he charged forward on a long run from defence and never made it back, injuring himself on his excursion. On came Harshae Raniga in his place. Useful replacement. Josh Redfearn got into a good spot but didn’t quite catch his shot. Meanwhile Jordan Vale was onto his last warning. Delicately poised.

Step up Oliver Fay...

Auckland City were back in deficit and there was nothing else to do but to introduce Cam Howieson and Ryan De Vries. A high-roller move from Albert Riera with less than half an hour remaining. But this was not like the first half where they steadily turned up the heat until they scored. United’s defence looked set. They were aggressive in the challenge, usually winning the ball (and not just the back three but dudes like Michael Den Heijer and Andrew Blake too). If anything they looked the more likely to add a third.

Of course, that’s without accounting for Emiliano Tade who in the 74th minute who swung his foot through a first time strike after Joe Lee had squared for him and it swung and dipped and went in off the underside of the bar. So similar to the first goal, both instances saw Lee cutting inside and Tade striking confidently from just outside the area. If it works, it works.

But that was not the final twist. Five minutes later Carey played a risky ball back towards his goalkeeper and in swooped Guy-Frank Essome-Penda, who made a really nice impact off the bench boosting the energy back up front, winning a few tackles and holding the ball up. And also getting a toe on that loose pass for the winning goal. Yeah, that too. A gently touch that only barely snuck over... not that it matters one bit.

You’d better believe that Auckland City went nuts for a third goal. Will Stephen slid in to block Tade. A corner tickled off the crossbar. De Vries squared a ball that Raniga got to first. Waite needed some extended treatment, taking more time out of the game. There were tackles and there were headers. There were shieldings out of play. Four minutes were added on. United tried to keep the ball in the corner. Manickum got in behind but was offside. Garriga was so close to a Manickum cross. Conor Tracey went up for a couple of last-gasp corner kicks. Ball was cleared. Final whistle went (before Ignacio Machuca could runaway and score into the open net seventy metres away). Auckland City lose for only the second time this year... both of them against the same team.

Auckland United were magnificent, this was an amazing game to watch. They were fully locked in from the start and didn’t panic upon twice conceding equalisers. The winner was a bit lucky but it came about from their persistent work and they then made damn sure there was no third equaliser. Jose Figueira’s tactical decisions worked beautifully against his old team and a couple ex-ACFC players were amongst their very best in Andrew Blake and Michael Den Heijer. Oliver Fay scored a goal and had an assist, serving up some cutting edge quality. The whole back three. Immense. Kurtis Mogg continues to play like a professional player with a point to prove in this (mostly) amateur league.

What more can you say? So long as Auckland United can keep scoring goals this team can go places. They’re the only undefeated team left and this win puts them up to second on the ladder. Some very tricky games remain – specifically Wellington Olympic next week - but it’s all in their own hands from here.

Auckland City have not hit their usual heights during this National League. The fatigue of a long season is part of that but also it could be the case that there are no easy games in this competition. All five matches have had their challenges. They can’t rotate players and win easily as they did on the way to their other trophies. You’re crazy if you think they’re not still the favourites for this thing though – three of their remaining four games are at home and they’re all against teams in the bottom half of the ladder. This is where it all gets serious.

Birkenhead United vs Cashmere Technical

Back in Tamaki Makaurau for some Sky Sports televised action, where the weather was almost as bad on Sunday as it had been on Saturday. Shepherd’s Park in Beach Haven... where the elements were a little more agricultural than they were beachy. Birko lost to Wellington Olympic last week but Auckland City’s defeat this week has really opened that finals chase back up again and these two teams were amongst those seeking to take advantage.

Birkenhead threw in Alex Connor-McClean up front and NZ U19s rep Everton O’Leary was handed his second start at wing-back. The only two differences from the 2-0 loss to Welly Olympic in round four. Cashmere Technical were really impressive in dispatching Melville 3-1 last week, especially Garbhan Coughlan who was off the charts. They made just one alteration to that starting team with Kian Donkers given his first National League start up front, Aidan Barbour-Ryan asked to do a job off the bench instead. Otherwise two very consistent teams with all the usuals ready to roll.

Having said that it was one of the changes that broke in first. Birkenhead had settled into their press but the Techies soaked it up. Then Kian Donkers picked up the ball up top and zipped past two defenders with a sharp turn before clinically picking out that bottom corner. Seventh minute. Donkers already making it clear why he’s one of the better striker prospects in the country. Fantastic number nine’s goal.

Donkers almost did it again soon after. Attacking that same right channel of the Birko defence but this time as he shaped for his shot Nick Forrester slid in and might’ve just gotten a crucial touch as that ball nicked off the crossbar and went over. Given as a goal kick though so maybe Donkers just hoofed it. Either way, danger signs. Granted, Birkenhead have plenty of flash in their own ranks too and a couple mins later we saw Dane Schnell take a pop from outside the box... and curl his shot perfectly inside the far post for a wonderful equaliser. Already two fantastic goals in this match and we’d only been going 13 minutes.

The action did not cease. The events did not subside. Dylan Hobson lined up a free kick from just outside the area which Coughlan blocked with a raised elbow. That’s a penalty, fella. Luke Jorgensen struck it home off the post, couldn’t have placed it any better - Danny Knight dove the right way and still had no chance. The mullet and moustache were soaked but the smile was beaming.

Very soon after there was an uncharacteristic breakdown at the back from Cashmere as Andrew Storer hesitated seeing Dane Schnell offside but Schnell pulled out and Alex Connor-McClean swooped in to take the ball on the run instead. Storer had a chance to shut that down. Didn’t do so. ACM squared for Schnell who was now back onside and from 1-0 down after seven minutes, Birkenhead were 3-1 up after 23 minutes. Schnelly with a brace.

The Techies tried to pounce as Coughlan stole the ball on the wing and charged into the area, squaring across the six yarn box but Forrester hacked it clear then Matthysen fizzed a first-time effort on target which Silvio Rodic turned out for a corner. Rodic had to make another save as Tom Schwarz won the header from the corner. Jacob Richards pinged it back in. Cleared for a throw. All of this was happening amongst some slippery sogginess. But that pressure from Cashmere came to nought as Alex Connor-McClean drilled a shot from the edge of the box that thumped in off the post. Another clinical finish. Great goal. ACM had missed a few big chances earlier in the season but this is what the Nelson native is capable of. 4-1 after 29 mins.

Dino Botica headed over from a corner. Birkenhead were seeking further goals in the rain, putting Cashmere in a spot where they could have crumbled. The Cantab team’s preparation had already been cramped by travel delays. The conditions were messy. They were well behind on the scoreboard and it was only the first half. But that’s not how this lot operates so Lyle Matthysen snuck in on a loose ball and when given room to shoot he obliged by thrashing that ball home from outside the area. Yet another thrilling goal.

The likes of Schnell and Coughlan still served up moments in the last few mins so it could have been even more. 4-2 at the break as the wildness thrived (which it did across the board this week). Back underway and Coughlan sliced infield to shoot and it took a large right boot from Rodic to deny him at the near post. If Tech could score next then it was very much game on. Then some silky work from O’Leary sparked a great Birko move but Schnell miss-hit his finish and Burfoot couldn’t slide there in time to catch up with it. There was also a Woods volley that got charged down. Though a long cross from Luke Tongue was also headed into the hands of Rodic by Coughlan while Donkers tried to create something with his movement. Don’t overlook a stinging Jacob Richards shot either.

The pace had dropped as the rainclouds eased up, not the same intensity as there had been earlier forcing defenders into mistakes. Cashmere were building things, usually through Coughlan, yet too of it much ended up straight at Rodic. The door-knocking continued. Miles Palmer came on and smashed Matthysen for a yellow card – Birko’s 11th yellow of the campaign, never ones to back out of of a challenge. Jorgo set up Burfoot for a stretched shot wide. Tech escaped that one then Donkers had a double chance to do something but Rodic again was where he needed to be. Another good save off Lachie McIsaac followed.

However any hope of a comeback ended on 83’ when Dane Schnell completed his hatty. Another turnover at the back, Everton O’Leary pocketing a blind pass and hitting Cam MacKenzie who squared it to Schnell. Big swing through that ball and it was five for Birko. Garbhan Coughlan did get one for his own tally right at the end, sticking a toe on a chip into the area from McIsaac and it rolled in off the post. Means that the game eventually ended with the hectic scoreline of 5-3.

That late goal was sneakily crucial as it keeps Auckland City ahead of Birkenhead on goal difference. Neither of them currently in the top two though, which they were after three weeks. Suddenly we’ve got a fascinating league table. Four games left for everyone to play. Extremely enticing. Birkenhead are right up there having only dropped points against City and Olympic so far. Important win from them. Not always as fluent as they’d like but Schnell and Connor-McClean were very good up front and Jorgensen was excellent in midfield. Can’t overlook the work of Silvio Rodic either. Let in three goals but he also ensured it wasn’t a few more than that.

Probably won’t see Cashmere Tech in the final after their third loss here. A few too many self-inflicted wounds which hurt them, as well as some well-taken goals (that goes both ways but Birko came out atop the ledger). Glad to see Kian Donkers get his first proper National League spotlight. Garbhan Coughlan continues to worry any defence he plays against. Lyle Matthysen scored a lovely goal. They let a few too many chances slide but overall there wasn’t much wrong with their attack. Problem was at the other end, particularly that Birkenhead blitz after the opening goal. Going from 1-0 up after seven to 4-1 down after 30. Don’t get away with that in the Natty League.

Christchurch United vs Melville United

Finally we had a meeting between two of the three teams yet to win a game after the first four weeks. Miramar Rangers were the other but they’d gotten W tahi a day earlier so these were the last two left... not exactly standing. Last two left sitting down, maybe. Christchurch United did grind out a pair of solid draws against Napier City Rovers and Auckland United though and 3-1 defeats to Birkenhead away and Wellington Phoenix in a match where their goalkeeper was sent off in only the sixth minute maybe aren’t the fairest reflections of Paul Ifill’s team.

Melville United got their lone point against the Phoenix thanks to a late penalty and they only lost to Auckland United due to a very late goal (the drama giveth, the drama taketh away). Could easily have been four losses, could easily have been two draws. And there’s definitely no shame in losing to Wellington Olympic or Cashmere Technical when they’re as rampant as they were those days. Obvious hesitancy here being that neither of these teams have yet discovered much attacking abundance. Oh boy was that about to change.

Both these teams had red cards last week so there were enforced changes. Christchurch brought in Edward Ashton as goalie to replace the suspended Scott Morris. Daniel MacLennan also got his first start up front with a few reshuffles of positions to make that all work. Melville stuck with the back four of last week but with Sean Liddocoat injured it meant Aaron Scott dropped deeper while John Oakman came in for Luke Searle, who was suspended. Campbell Brown might’ve gotten that spot instead but he was suspended too. Liam Hayes returned to the midfield while Quinton Kipara got the start on the right side of midfield.

There was some strong emphasis on the blistering heat at Christchurch Football Centre. 22 degrees according to the commentary... which is certainly toasty but not exactly the flaming depths of hell compared to North Island standards. However the heat always feels way worse on those artificial turfs so fair enough. Wanna make sure you start fast so you can manage conditions. Christchurch United tried to do so as Mika Rabuka played a great angled pass that didn’t quite meet MacLennan’s run. Melville didn’t try... they did. An early goal, what do you know? Aaron Scott with the long ball towards Ryen Lawrence who fought his way onto it and then made that net swish.

Kickoff had been delayed due to Melville’s plane not taking off on time which often makes it tough to get in the proper headspace by kickoff. No such worries here. Melville had good energy from the wings, only pressing selectively but throwing four dudes at it when they did. Chch Utd still had more of the ball. A few Rabuka flashes as well as Matt Tod-Smith shooting wide had them perked up. Max Tommy had to slap away a dangerous Eddie Wilkinson corner kick. Another corner saw Jordan Spain nod back to Noah Billingsley who headed over the top, damn. Great moment. Then MacLennan hit the post after a Wilkinson pass had put him 1v1 but the flag went up for an obvious offside so he’s off the hook.

Point being that the home team did have some chances while the game was in the balance. Never the less, they didn’t take them and then boom it was 2-0 after 29 mins as Braedan Quilter-Phipps turned beautifully on the ball and advanced it to Ryen Lawrence again... who crunched it in for his second. That had CU coach Paul Ifill feeling antsy so there was a very early sub with defender Noa Prestel on for Billingsley barely half an hour in. But it didn’t work because Raheem Hunter headed in a corner (from Kipara) after 35 mins before a shambles of a back pass by Riley Grover caught Ashton off his line – neither aware of what the other was planning on doing – and as the keeper slipped over old mate Oliver Colloty swooped in to finish into the empty net from a deceptive angle. Scoring against his old club having joined Melville at the start of the year seeking more regular first team minutes. That’s quite the way stroll back into town.

That made it 4-0 at half time. After Colloty’s goal there was a Melville fan overheard on the livestream singing: “Can we play you every week?”. It was genuinely incredible stuff... Melville had only scored two goals in four games and one of those was a penalty. Now they’d scored four in one half and Lawrence almost made it five just before the whistle with a low driven attempt that Ashton dove and stopped.

Joel Peterson was subbed on by Christchurch at the half, already two changes having been made, though avert your eyes because this got worse before it could get better. Josh Galletly had been at the heart of a lot of Melville’s work from the midfield and so it was cool to see him step up and, you know... score an unreal direct free kick smashed straight into the top corner still rising as it struck its target.

Wilkinson did get Max Tommy stretching out in mid-air to make a save. Then Daniel MacLennan poked in a second for Chch from the corner, his initial effort colliding with a defender but then he stuck a leg out as he fell back and finally the home side were on the board.

They almost had another when Prestel rattled the crossbar after the ball had landed in his zone from a deep corner although Jerson Lagos also burst his way into the opposite penalty area and blasted a shot into Ashton’s mitts so there was no guarantee that Melville were done with five. It got to the stage where coach Paul Ifill had to do something drastic. He had to sub himself onto the pitch...

Yeah, mate. 43 year old Paul Ifill on for a cheeky twenty minutes at right wing-back. In fairness, United had been doing some decent things with possession in the second half but Melville’s lead meant they could sit deep and soak it all up. Hence not a lot of overt moments at either end. If anyone deserved a goal for CU then it was Mika Rabuka but he was charged down by Tommy as his major chance arrived. Rabuka also had a crack after a short corner only his shot hit Ifill who them had head in hands as he missed a bit of a sitter... luckily for him he was offside. Other than that we saw some delightful flicks from Ifill, one glimpse of the ol’ Phoenix favourite chop turn, as well as a wicket cross to Peterson who whipped his effort wide at the near post. Good fun.

Matt Tod-Smith acrobatically volleyed in a second for Christchurch with ten to go. Tommy had come out to punch a clearance but didn’t get it far enough and MTS was able to contort his body to strike it into the empty net from the edge of the box. That was enough to restore some dignity. Might’ve been more as Ifill held the ball up then fired over on the turn. Didn’t matter. 5-2 final score.

Melville United had scored two goals in four games then suddenly they scored five in one. It was the young fellas doing the mahi too. Ryen Lawrence, Raheem Hunter, Oli Colloty, Josh Galletly... Hunter is 25 but the other three are all 19 years of age. This burst of goals came out of nowhere but damn they scored some belters. If that’s the most memorable game that Melville fans come away from this National League campaign with then nobody’ll be complaining.

Less so for Christchurch United who are now the only team left without a win and have sunk to bottom of the table. The Southern League champs were always going to have trouble going from being overlords to underdogs, big fish in a small pond to small fish in the ocean, and although this was the first time they scored more than once in a game it was also the first time they’ve been blown out in defence. Doesn’t sound like Blake Weston will be back in a hurry to help that effort.

Might just have to treat this as a developmental season. Cashmere Tech and Christchurch United were neck and neck in the regionals but there’s been a clear advantage for the Technical with their copious experience at this level. It makes a huge difference. Chch Utd haven’t got that yet other than a few of main players... but there’s only one way to get it.

So to recap... we just saw 32 goals across five games. Scorelines of 5-2, 3-2, 3-2, 5-3, and 5-2. Every single team conceded at least twice and three teams allowed five – two of those teams doing so whilst playing at home. Goals galore. What’s more is that the team who were atop the ladder lost and now we’ve got a situation where only two points separate first from fourth with four rounds left and only two teams gonna get to the grand final. This National League, mate. This National League.

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