Yo, I came up with a New South Wales team off the top of the dome thanks to you Andrew Fifita. How you didn't keep your spot in the Blues after game one is beyond me and people seem to forget about you when they're talking about how Blake Austin should have got a run. I got your back though and I've also got the backs of these lads.

There's a few obvious trends at play here as all these blokes are pretty young, while also being slightly freakish. I low key reckon that this team would give the current NSW side a run for their money...

Matt Moylan - All class and his ball playing ability would cause all sorts of problems for the Blues. His freak ability comes from the fact that he just doesn't look like he can do what he can do - he glides and he flings passes 20 metres casually.

Alex Johnston - On the small size, but he's shown that he's a gun each and every time he pulls that Rabbitohs jersey. His try-scoring exploits are stuff of folklore in our freaky town.

James Roberts - The purest of freaks. Freakish speed, freakish strength and he's showing that he can put the past behind him, I like that.

Kane Linnett - Someone who doesn't get much praise, but every week he turns out a solid performance for the Cowboys. He's a big unit who can do whatever is asked of him, an overlooked freakish ability.

Akuila Uate - Just that x-factor, ya know? Uate might have struggled to handle Queensland's kicking game when he was in the Origin arena but who cares about that, I'm all about athletes and athletics.

Blake Austin - A ball-runner, damn how about that!? How about a half who can step, jink and jive, how about a little razzle dazzle? If Laurie Daley wants to play safe/scared, I'd happily take Austin.

Adam Reynolds - The general, the master of getting the ball where it needs to be and getting his team where they need to be. Remember when Trent Hodkinson and Mitchell Pearce went missing and couldn't run the show? Yeah well, Reynolds ... no chance of that happening.

Jack De Belin - A rugged forward who'll rip in and show up for every tackle/hit up. Slightly less freaky than others, but again, being relied on to do a solid job is an overlooked freakish ability.

Mitch Rein - He was on the cusp, so no real dramas here but I also reckon his running game would be pose problems. There's not many freakish NSW hookers who deserve a look in, so Rein gets the nod.

Andrew Fifita - The man, the man behind all of this.

Tariq Sims - Legend has it that he used to play on the wing, until he discovered how to eat. Sims is a beast in all aspects and is a handful to stop out on the edge.

Tyson Frizzell - On the cusp again and now we've got two strong ball-runners on either edge.

Dale Finucane - Stock standard middle forward who gets through plenty of work and will be a proper rep player at some stage in the future. You won't win if you've got a team of freaks, but not enough job-doing freaks.

Dylan Walker - Why isn't Walker in my starting spot, over Linnett? Well Walker can come off the bench and Linnett can not. Walker makes things happen and I'd give him all the freedom he deserves, trying to stop an unleashed Walker would be a mission.

Tepai Moeroa - Chuck him on in the middle and watch opponents crumble and tumble. Bit of edge cover as that's where he plays for the Eels, but I need beasts up the guts.

Ryan James - Similar to Moeroa as he's done a nice job moving out to the edge for the Titans.

Tyrone Peachey - The Peach, capable of playing pretty much anywhere but he doesn't suffer in the toughness-stakes and would mix it up with the big boys. With Walker and Peachey on the field at the same time, you'd struggle to keep up.

Training starts this week at the Papatoetoe rec grounds in South Auckland, please contact the Niche Cache if you're unable to make it. Alternatively, if you can make trainings, please also contact the Niche Cache as that would be pretty cool.

Games are unconfirmed. Possibility that we'll line up a game against a few of our friends, so that would be cool.

Leave the cocaine and peptides at home, we've got that sorted, it's cool.

Please wear you club training gear to our training, if you are to come to our training which would be cool. We will be stealing your training gear afterwards, cool huh?

We have set up Tinder profiles for all of you, well those of you who are single. We aren't home wreckers, we're cool.

Complementary feeds will be put on by KFC, we have a large stash of anti-food poisoning medication as well. Cool.