It’s reached that point of the NBA calendar where the All-Star starters are announced, and over the years this has proven to be a controversial topic. Is Tim Duncan a center or a power forward? Should MJ really be starting over Vince? Should we eliminate fan voting? And to really go back, is it even safe for Magic Johnson to be playing? (For the record, the answers are power forward, yes, no, and yes).

The very nature of the fan-driven voting process means that inevitably people get flustered when their favourite players are overlooked despite having an MVP-worthy season (Steph Curry) in favour of cult players on the decline (Duncan, Garnett) or players from huge markets (Yao Ming, Jeremy Lin). Every year without doubt fan forums and friend circles are divided along the lines of promoting who they believe deserves the nod, and players themselves have been known to try and rustle up a few votes via campaigns such as “Show Kevin some Love” and Chris Bosh’s memorable 2008 video dressed as a used-car salesman.

The campaigning and champagning is over now though so I’m going to give my rundown on the 2014 starters for both conferences – who snuck in by reverse psychology, who is the biggest surprise and who is the least deserving? Let’s find out...

Unfortunately fans can’t vote on the uniforms. These are terrible.

Western Conference

PG: Steph Curry. Steph has been balling out of his mind recently, averaging a league-leading 3.2 threes a game and a second-best 9.2 assists, leading Kevin Durant to call him the greatest shooter in NBA history. With stats like these and his stroke as wet as it is, it’s hard to disagree with him. After being robbed last year of a reserve slot this starting spot is well deserved, especially after Chris Paul’s unfortunate injury. Prediction: Could set new record for most 3’s in the game.

SG: Kobe Bryant. This is perhaps the most inevitable selection despite the fact he’s only played in a handful of games all year, due to the overwhelming support he has worldwide. Fans will vote for him based on name and legend alone until he retires, despite him going on record as saying that they should vote for younger, more deserving players like Damien Lillard. He’s announced that he’ll sit out the game in order to avoid injury, so don’t get your hopes up for a repeat performance of his two late game blocks on LeBron from last year. Prediction: James Harden will replace him in the starting lineup and set a record for most wild head flails.

SF: Kevin Durant. KD. Durantula. The Slim Reaper. Whichever nickname you want to use for him (Slim Reaper is by far the best) this guy simply gets it done on a night to night basis. Leading the league in scoring, nearly 7 feet tall and one of the most clutch performers in the game, Durant is the favourite for MVP and arguably the 2nd best player in basketball. I don’t think he’s the most exciting player in the world, probably due to how easy he makes it all look and lack of true highlight reel dunks, but his matchup against either Paul George or LeBron will be the most anticipated of the night. Prediction: Tweets about his disdain for the Slim Reaper moniker will overshadow his game.

PF: Blake Griffin. For purely personal reasons, this is the first selection I’m not thrilled with. Maybe it’s because I’m a Lakers fan, maybe it’s because I hate his stupid blank face after every dunk he does, and maybe it’s his stumpy little arms. Whatever the reason, I think Blake is somewhat overrated. Whilst undeniably a great dunker, I think people overestimate his true offensive capabilities due to how easy it must be to play next to Chris Paul, and his defence is average at best. Having said that, he’s tailor-made for the all-flash no substance nature of All-Star games, so perhaps he deserves this spot after all. Prediction: blank face mean mugging after a barrage of alley-oops.

C: Kevin Love. This is my biggest surprise of the night and the selection that I’m most pleased about, although again this may have something to do with the fact that I’m a Lakers fan so I’m bound to hope that Dwight Howard fails at everything he does. Kevin Love is perhaps my second favourite player in the league, because watching a short unathletic white guy outrebound and outscore hyper-athletes like Dwight and Blake never gets old. An absolute terror on the glass and a bomber from deep, K-Love is probably the most well-rounded PF in the game (sorry Lamarcus) and is also the only white guy in either starting line-up. Prediction/Hope: gets traded to the Lakers.

Eastern Conference

PG: Kyrie Irving. Kyrie largely claims this spot by default as the East is so devoid of talent that the only other real challengers were Kyle Lowry in Toronto and John Wall in Washington, both of whom aren’t as well-known as the guy who was meant to fill LeBrons shoes in Cleveland. He slipped off the radar a bit early in the season and people were questioning whether he’d ever really be a truly great player, but he’s putting up nice enough numbers now to warrant the start. Prediction: Will break someone’s ankles like he did to Brandon Knight in the Rookie Challenge

SG: Dwayne Wade. It really shows the state of the Eastern conference and the SG spot in general when a guy who will rest for multiple games at a time can still comfortably be an All-Star starter. Sure, he’s averaging nearly 20 ppg, but I can’t help but feel that someone like Aaron Afflalo is at risk of being criminally overlooked for even being a reserve when he could arguably be a starter. Either way, I can’t see D-Wade playing very long with his knees in the state they are, so don’t expect fireworks. Prediction: Will barely play unless it’s a close game in the 4th.

SF1: LeBron James. It’s LeBron. Definitely the best player to come out of a stacked 2003 draft, and almost definitely the best player in the NBA (and the world) right now – what else is there to say? Prediction: If the East win (which they won’t), he’ll be the MVP.

SF2: Paul George. PG24 has always flown under the radar somewhat, putting up good enough stat lines and being a crucial part of an Indiana team that has always threatened to break out, but wasn’t really a household name until he absolutely took it to LeBron and the Heat in the playoffs last year. This year he’s continued along the same lines, racking up monster game after monster game and being both an offence and defensive lynchpin for the team I think is the best in the league. Plus, did you see his 360 windmill jam recently? Woowee... Prediction: Will throw down at least one ridiculous dunk.

SF3: Carmelo Anthony. On a Knicks team that is carrying on their tradition of mediocrity, Melo is the only bright point. If you watch any NY games, he’ll be the only guy who’s diving on balls, getting putbacks, and generally doing all the small things that you need to do in order to actually win some games. This shows with the fact that despite playing alongside two 7 footers and being moved from the PF spot he played last year, he’s averaging around 9 rebounds a game which is pretty incredible. Three SFs in the starting lineup means he’ll probably be asked to guard K-Love, which could be an interesting matchup, but could also mean the East gets killed on the boards. Prediction: Will thoroughly enjoy playing with team mates that actually have some talent.

So there we have it, your 2014 NBA All-Star starters. On paper it seems that the West will destroy the East, particularly when the reserves come on, but being an All-Star game it really comes down to who can actually be bothered putting in any effort during the first 3 quarters. Look for hometown hero Anthony Davis to get voted in by the coaches and receive huge playing time, and for Boogie Cousins to be the biggest snub. Prediction: West take it easily, with The Brow being the early favourite for MVP.