Mourinho's Notebook - Footballers Behaving Badly
Arturo Vidal sheds some tears in his post-crash presser
Arturo Needs A Lift
Juventus and Chile midfielder Arturo Vidal probably needs to install the uber app or something, because he certainly won’t be driving to trainings and games for the rest of the Copa America in his native land. Not now that he's had his license temporarily revoked after totalling his Ferrari and getting done for drunk-driving. But don’t worry, he’ll still be playing for his country, his coach basically saying that Vidal’s too important to be punished.
Chilean coach Jorge Sampaoli:
“I never test my players for alcohol when they arrive at training. I trust my team. I know they’ll give their everything to win. And I don’t see their decision to drink as a question of my authority. If he hadn’t crashed, he would have arrived at the right time to training but maybe not been able to control what state he was in. The group will understand this decision is not because he’s Vidal but because it’s a situation that we need to manage.”
Translated from PR Speak: As long as they win me games, those players can be killing hookers and burying their bodies for all I care. I’m not getting paid to babysit. But if he turns up slightly hungover to training then he’d better not miss a tackle.
While Vidal wasn’t injured in the crash beyond the odd scratch, he wasn’t too happy with the police intervention. He allegedly told the officer who arrested him: “You can handcuff me but you’ll only be fucking up the whole of Chile.” Nice bloke. He’s gonna have to show up to the Chilean embassy in Milan every month for about four months as legal proceedings continue.
Dempsey’s Temper
Gotta hand it to former Fulham and Spurs striker, slash amateur rapper, Clint Dempsey. When he goofs, he at least has a sense of originality about it.
The US Men’s National Team captain and legend (God, what an abhorrent nickname, right?) is in some strife after literally ripping up a referee’s handbook having just seen a teammate sent off. He was playing for the Seattle Sounders in a US Open Cup fourth round clash with the Portland Timbers.
Tied 1-1 at the end of regulation, Seattle had been forced to battle through to that point after a controversial 67th minute second yellow for Brad Evans, and an injury to Obafemi Martins that meant he couldn’t continue. He also couldn’t be subbed off since they’d used their three changes already. So into extras and they were 2-1 down with less than ten minutes remaining when Michael Aziri was shown a debatable straight red for an elbow to his marker.
Needless to say, Dempsey didn’t take it too well. Slapping the ref’s notebook out of his hand, he then picked it up and tore it to shreds. Teammates had to hold him back from getting in the ref’s face and he applauded a linesman on his way off.
The score ended up at 3-1, Seattle ended up with seven men on the park – they finished in a 3-3-0 formation. And it could get worse for Dempsey, because if his actions are deemed as assault upon a match official then he’s looking at a 3 month ban.
Still, it wasn’t as bad as this guy in Argentina the other day:
The Silkmen
Fresh from launching their own club-based bid for the 2026 World Cup, non-league battlers Macclesfield Town may not be the best team going around, but they certainly have one of the best social media squads.
Their latest move is a daring attempt to lure Raheem Sterling to Moss Rose Stadium by crowdfunding the £50m transfer fee that Liverpool are said to be after. For the record, Manchester City have had both £25m and £40m bids rejected.
From the crowdfunder.co.uk page:
Everybody at Macclesfield Town were delighted to hear that Liverpool FC have reportedly set a value on Raheem Sterling. Press reports indicate that the Reds are looking for around £50million for the young England international.
Now, due to the cost of launching a World Cup bid, Macclesfield Town Football Club are obviously running a little low when it comes to funding a move for Raheem, so we are looking for your help in bringing Raheem to Macclesfield!
We aim to raise the easily achievable sum of £50,000,000 to fund a transfer bid for Sterling. While Raheem may struggle to adapt to the physicality of the Vanarama National League his technique would be ideal for the division.
Admittedly, the move would be a little step down from the Premier League, but we here at Macclesfield Town can guarantee that Raheem wouldn't have to sit on the bench and watch a 6-1 defeat at Stoke City.
So please throw your support in helping raise the transfer fee to bring Stirling to Macclesfield. This player could be the difference in helping us retain the Cheshire Cup next season.
In the unlikely event of the Silkmen being outbid by the likes of Manchester City, any funds raised will be used to fund a bid for another star attacker. While we are on the subject, has anybody got a number for Lionel Messi?
Unfortunately, the Silkmen are a little distance off their goal…
United Passions, Still United In Dispassion
So an update on the terrible, horrific, disaster of a PR stunt that was the FIFA film United Passions. We talked about it last week, and how it had one of the worst grossing opening weekends in American film history (after a pathetic response in Europe already). Well, you can dump the ‘one of the’ part of that last sentence.
The US$918 that it made in North America on its opening weekend is officially the lowest grossing film in US cinematic history. It did at least do slightly better in Russia (the 2018 World Cup hosts) where it made $158,000 – still only a tiny fraction of the cost of the film. You won’t be surprised to read that there are no plans to distribute it in Britain or Germany, while in France it went straight to DVD and it had a pathetic response to its TV broadcast in Italy.
The film’s director, Frederic Auburtin, has finally spoken about it too. And he was NOT complimentary:
"Now I'm seen as bad as the guy who brought AIDS to Africa or the guy who caused the financial crisis. My name is all over [this mess] and apparently I am a propaganda guy making films for corrupt people."
Lead actor and Sepp Blatter portrayer Tim Roth has mostly declined to talk about it, although he has admitted that he only took the job for the money and that he now completely regrets it. Here’s what he told German paper Bild:
"Yeah, I apologize I didn't question the director, I didn't question the script. This is a role that will have my father turning in his grave."
And that was before the FIFA scandals broke!
Both Sam Neill and Tim Roth have refused to do any publicity for the movie. In fact when it opened at Cannes in 2014, Gerard Depardieu was the only member of the main cast to bother to show up.
Auburtin also spoke about the process of making the film. Initially he had wanted it to be an unbiased retelling of the story, despite the idea having been pitched by FIFA. But when the film ran out of cash during production, FIFA stepped in by doubling their financial input from US$13m to $26m. Suddenly they were far more involved and Aubertin says he felt the need to pander more, in the way that you would for a major studio.
"In my mind, it was now like making a film for a major studio — the guy who has the power is the guy who is paying. You have to be loyal to the guy who is paying for it, unless you're Jean-Luc Goddard or Quentin Tarantino, people who are very very powerful and they can say fuck off to everybody."
Unsurprisingly, FIFA had the final edit on the film, though Aubertin did at least win one battle. FIFA had initially wanted to call the film either ‘Men Of Legend’ or ‘The Dream Makers’ before settling for the director’s United Nations pun. S’pose things can always be worse, aye?
A Galactico’s Galaxy
In what might be the final frontier of fame, Cristiano Ronaldo has had a galaxy named after him.
Actually, the galaxy is named Cosmos Redshift 7, but given the lead astronomer is from the University of Lisbon, it’s also pretty obviously a nod to CR7. Apparently it’s the brightest galaxy ever observed from Earth, a collection of millions of stars emitting light that’s taken 12.9 billion years to travel this far. Makes you feel about as insignificant as you do when Ronaldo takes his shirt off, doesn’t it?
Social Media Stunners
Alan Pardew's certainly making the most of his holidays in Ibiza...
Mary Fellaini on holiday... *shivers*