Another A-League season has come and gone and for the fifth time in their nine years (and third in the last four) the Wellington Phoenix will not get a game in the playoffs. Not a huge shocker for a team that won only three of its last 8 games but still a frustration for one that at times looks to be so damn good and at others can appear a complete mess. The last few months have seen far more of the latter and with the licence thing finally resolved and a few key players on their way out, it seems the club is at something of a crucial point in its history. Mate, but settle down. There’s no reason to worry about the Nix because we’ve got it all covered right here. Give Ernie Merrick and the suits a heads up if you see them.

1. Buy a Damn Striker

Like, a proper striker. Not another one of these deep-lying forwards or wide creative types but a genuine goalmouth hunting centre forward. A poacher, a finisher. Somebody who’ll get them 12-15 goals a season just by being in the right place at the right time. It’s the kind of player that this club arguably hasn’t had since Shane Smeltz was here in the early days (Smeltz is still the Nix's second all-time scorer). Chris Greenacre did his darndest to fill that void but Jeremy Brockie was never at his best holding the line – he’s a player more drawn to the spectacular – and his inconsistent goal returns could be a bit of a worry. Stein Huysegems was way too slow, Roy Krishna is better wider with more space to run, Blake Powell and Hamish Watson have proved solid placeholders but neither is gonna be the killer goal hound they need. Even Nathan Burns, for a dude who scored 13 goals last season, wasn’t a great finisher.

2. Replace Siggy

Actually, not only Siggy but Manny as well. Jeez, it’s quite scary to consider what this team is gonna look like at the back next season. Sigmund’s injuries this year have already exposed a lot of that. To be fair, we did discover Dylan Fox, who looks a player worth sticking with, but he alone is not gonna solve some pretty drastic issues. Andy Durante is signed up for two more seasons but he’ll be 34 when next season begins. Tommy Doyle fares to be our most experienced fullback. For a team that conceded 54 goals in 27 games, losing two defensive starters is frightening and there are serious worries about this defence moving into the future.

3. Don’t Sack the Manager

There are clubs out there that would and there are fans out there suckered in by the non-stop press spectacle but nobody really thinks that any of this is Ernie Merrick’s fault. His record with the club actually isn’t very good – 29 wins in 85 games – yet Ernie is a champ. He’s a respected leader and a proven football mind. It’d be nice if he could win us a playoff game but you’ve gotta believe he’s doing his best. Ernie all the way. We love Ernie.

4. Ransack the ASB Premiership

It’s worked before. Albert Riera and Roy Krishna are two of the best players in this team and both made their name in the NZ stuff. Not to mention Ben Sigmund. Actually, most of the kiwi players on the Nix have played a few games there and with the ASB Prem having been well televised last season we finally get to see some of the local talent on show. It’s a big step up to the A-League but there are lads that have done it, there are surely a few hidden gems available. How would Ryan De Vries go at that level? What about Micah Lea’alafa or Clayton Lewis? Hamish Watson just made decent with a second stint, what say Sean Lovemore and Aaron Clapham? Now that you mention it, there’s this dude playing for Hawkes Bay United called Paul Ifill…

5. Find A Way to Fit in All These Creative Dudes

It’s been hard enough for Ernie to find an on-field balance with the likes of Roly Bonevacia, Mike McGlinchey, Roy Krishna and friends all offering plenty of go-forward and that’s only gonna get more difficult when Kosta Barbarouses and Gui Finkler join the lads from the Melly Victory. Those are two high profile signings and there’s definitely an argument that they aren’t filling needs with them but then maybe Ernie falls back on the old Wengerism that you can never have too many attacking midfielders. Or maybe when players of that quality are available, you don’t turn them down. Either way, they’re huge additions and now it’s up to the coaching staff to figure out how to put them to work in a way that maximises what all these guys can offer. Maybe that means a formation change, something closer to a 4-2-3-1, or maybe it’s a matter of competition for places. Finkler can play deeper which is super handy, while Kosta can offer width in a way that only Krishna (and maybe Kwabena Appiah) can elsewise. Wee Mac McGlinchey could be the odd man out here (and he just signed a new 2-year deal).

6. Get the Best Out of Roly Poly

Not that we don’t regularly see greatness from the Dutchman. But he’s clearly too good for this league and he only has one more year on his deal. We know he wants to test himself at a higher standard, so 2016-17 should be in large part about getting the best out of one of the best players the club has ever had. That’s not only about how he’s played, perhaps more than anything it’s about the A-League giving the bloke some bloody protection. The most fouled player in the competition, the sight of Roly collapsing in pain because some tough bugger defender hacked him down after he skinned him with pure skill was a regular at Westpac and elsewhere and that is not a good look. Take note, A-League refs. We will not stand idly by as one of our boys is gruesomely targeted.

7. Get a Licence Extension

Oh no, wait. They already did that. Moving on now.

8. Bring Back the Love

This is a hard one to quantify. Despite the best efforts of arguably NZ’s finest supporters group, the Yellow Fever, if feels like the Nix aren’t as fun as they used to be. Clearly winning games will do a lot to help that, once those victories start rolling in again then we’ll see smiles on the pitch, shirtless Wellingtonians (as God intended) and Ernie swigging beers from plastic cups on the sideline. However there’s more they can do. Up the online content, get the players out there showing off their human side. Grab the decision makers at Sky TV and shake them by the collars to actually give us some freaking pre- and post-match stuff. For Christ’s sake, Ben Sigmund retired and they wouldn’t even show us the presentation after the game. Get some analysis going, give the fans something more. The bonus there is that you can then start guiding the narrative because right now people are seeing that the Phoenix lost again and it’s all a drag. Get Ernie on telly talking about his plans and high expectations for next season and suddenly people are seeing things in a different light. For that matter, dump Fred de Jong from the commentary team and get Harry Ngata in as full-time colour analyst. If he’s sick or has a kid’s birthday to go to then, hell, bring in Ben Sigmund. And please, please, please get Jason Pine in there commentating full time and just leave Andrew Dewhurst to yell out empty hype-ups at Breakers games.