Flying Kiwis – November 24

Chris Wood - Burnley FC (English Premier League)

Nature must be healing because after bagging a double for the All Whites in midweek, Chris Wood was back out for Burnley and nodding away his third goal of the Premier League season. 27th minute of the match, home to Crystal Palace, and a free kick was sent long into the penalty area where James Tarkowski nodded it back across goal and The Woodsman bowed to glance a header of his own in off the post. Lurking and pouncing. That’s how a good poacher operates.

He’d been a little short of his usual standards of finishing to begin this season, an issue compounded by Burnley’s concerning drop in defensive standards. But there was nothing wrong with that one. What’s more is that was a milestone banger for the fella. His fiftieth Premier League goal. 49 of them for Burnley and 1 for Leicester City. No surprises that the vast majority came from in the box, note the 17 headers as well.

Chris Wood is the 125th man to reach the 50-goal milestone in the Premier League era. Only 210 more to go to catch Alan Shearer’s record.

That goal was only one of a big handful in a frantic first half. Neither team looked like they had a clue how to defend what the other side had to offer. Christian Benteke got things going in the 8th minute by foot-punching one in off the post after Burnley failed to clear a cross, Benteke’s shot going in via a deflection. But ten mins later Ben Mee thumped a header in from a corner kick to tie things up. Then came Wood’s goal and Burnley were in front... except by the time we got to the break Conor Gallagher had set up another Benteke goal (36’) and Marc Guehi had fired home on the rebound after a well-worked short corner routine (41’). Naturally though it only took Maxwel Cornet four minutes after the second half kicked off to add another impressive finish to his highlight reel with a thumping volley.

3-3 after 49 mins... then 3-3 after 90 mins. No more goals in this one however it wasn’t for lack of trying as Wilfried Zaha cannoned a volley off the crossbar and Luka Milivojevic had a shot deflected wide for Palace while Tarkowski could have done better with a header he sent straight at the Palace keeper and Matej Vydra also forced a good save late on. But the one Sean Dyche was talking about afterwards was when Chris Wood was seemingly bundled over by Joachim Andersen as the last defender, only for the ref to ignore it and VAR to find nothing wrong. Would have been a tad generous but as the saying goes: you’ve seen them given. A draw doesn’t get Burnley out of the relegation zone but at least they’re starting to tick over points with three draws and a win from their last four matches.

Chris Wood: “It’s always nice to score goals. I want to score as many as I can. [10+ goals in four straight seasons] is a very nice accolade that I’m sure I will look back on when I retire, but for me it’s doing it again this season and more. That’s what I want to try and do and hopefully I can achieve that this season... Hopefully there's a lot more to come! There’s enough time when you retire to look back. It’s all about trying to do as much as you can when you’re playing for both club and country. It's nice to hit the 50 mark, but hopefully I’ve got a lot more in me and I can double that.”

Nice moment as he got subbed off too where Chris Wood noticed a young fan in the crowd and chucked him his shirt. Do it for the fans, right on.

And here’s a bit more fun...

Up Next: Burnley vs Tottenham on Monday at 3am (NZT)

Bill Tuiloma – Portland Timbers / Michael Boxall – Minnesota United (American Major League Soccer)

Coming out of the international break and into the MLS Playoffs where friends become enemies. Probably a good thing that Bill Tuiloma wasn’t with the All Whites last week for the sake of his friendship with Michael Boxall.

The actual reason Tui wasn’t in the UAE with the lads was a pesky injury that kept him out of the last game of the regular season. That always felt like a precautionary thing with the playoffs in mind and, sure enough, while he didn’t make the starting XI (and wasn’t expected to), he was there on the bench for this game. Michael Boxall of course was a locked on starter for Minnesota. The last two kiwis remaining in the American top tier soccer season, male of female, going head to head with only one man to advance.

Minnesota got off to an amazing start. The first ten minutes were kinda boring but then all of a sudden Romain Metanire got in on the overlap and squared for Franco Fragapane to tap into an empty net for 1-0. However Portland were the home team here. They were the higher qualifiers. Thus after the early blow of going behind they responded by pushing Minnesota deep and turning up the heat. There was a Manny Reynoso free kick on target but otherwise it was the Timbers looking by far the more likely to score next.

Playoff pressure does funky things to teams. With the lead, the Loons had something to protect and if they’d only held on ‘til half-time then that pressure might have flipped around. They didn’t though. The pressure was too much. Biyake Dibassy was somehow able to shoulder a Larrys Mabiala bicycle kick (yes, you read that right) off the line... but a succession of corners eventually saw Mabiala head in on 43’. Then Sebastian Blanco fired in a second-phase volley 61 seconds into the second half and this game had flipped.

Minny conceded just before and just after the break – not ideal. Now they had to find another goal from somewhere, taking risks that left them vulnerable. Hence in the 66th minute Blanco blasted in a superb third from range with nobody closing him down. Two great goals from him to be fair. The Loons did threaten a bit from set pieces down the home straight and had a very decent shout for a handball penalty... but alas ‘twas not to be. No defensive closer Bill Tuiloma appearance, annoyingly. But he’ll get another chance as the Portland Timbers advance with a 3-1 win. They were the more potent team, they had the better chances, they deserved it. All aboard the Bill Tuiloma train now.

Boxall had a relatively quiet game. Lots of good organisational stuff but not a heap of tackles or clearances or those sorta things. Very good passing success rate. Also he got a yellow card in the second half.

As for Bill Tuiloma, he may not have taken part in the match itself but he still had a major impact on it... by winding up his defensive buddy Larrys Mabiala about his lack of goals. Motivational mastermind.

Up Next: MLS Conference Semis, Colorado vs Portland, Friday at 10.30am (NZT)

Ria Percival – Tottenham Hotspur (English Super League)

Kiwi midfielder against kiwi coach (with a kiwi reserve goalkeeper). It was Spurs vs West Ham, Ria Percival against Olli Harder (and Anna Leat). Also Ria Percival against her old club, the team that brought her to the WSL in the first place. A London Derby too. After draws against Manchester United and Arsenal, then an 11-0 win in the Conti Cup midweek vs Watford which Percival sat out as one of a number of players rested, Tottenham were in fine form. Have been all season... but West Ham are proving a tough nut to crack under Olli Harder.

Percy was swiftly into the action. Her hard pressing has been a major factor for Spurs and after winning the ball high up she got in behind and cut it back for Kyah Simon but to no avail. Then she had a crack herself from distance but couldn’t keep it down. One of her corner kicks was headed wide by Ashleigh Neville as well. However there was a big downer for Spurs in that first half as Kit Graham had to be stretchered off after half an hour – one of their best attacking forces facing a spell on the sidelines.

Nil-all at the half, Spurs had the ball in the back of the net soon after thanks to Chioma Ubogagu... but she was offside. Tottenham have won a lot of close games this season so this was nothing new. But West Ham were increasingly getting at them and in the 69th minute they broke the deadlock. Dagny Brynjarsdottir with the finish as a deflected square ball fell into her path and she gave it a whack. Again Ubogagu had a goal disallowed for offside. Then Mackenzie Arnold showed the standards that Anna Leat’s reaching for with a wonderful one-handed save off Rachel Williams. Meanwhile Tameka Yallop nearly scored a rocket at the other end. Funky game... but a 1-0 win for West Ham who are now only two points behind fourth-placed Spurs. Highlights/replay on the FA Player as always.

You’ll not be surprised to hear that: a) Ria Percival played ninety minutes, and b) Ria Percival earned a yellow card. Little lucky to avoid a second one with a couple mins left, to be honest. Got a good talking to but the ref was mercifully lenient. Needless to say that Percy did not agree with either of those foul calls.

Up Next: 13 December at 7am away to Aston Villa (NZT)

Sarpreet Singh - SSV Jahn Regensburg (German 2. Liga)

Tweet there says it all. Regensburg weren’t really at the races against Hamburger. For whatever reason they were flat from the beginning and were lucky not to have already conceded when Ludovit Reis finally opened the scoring after half an hour, running unchecked down the right channel before blasting in near post. SSV Jahn did have a decent response to that. Singh with the clever ball forward and Jan-Niklas Beste with the even better finish... but a fine ball through from Sonny Kittel allowed Faride Alidou to score for Hamburger before the half was through, the home team back in front.

Hamburger had a goal disallowed by VAR for offside while it was still 1-1. Twenty minutes into the second half came an instance where the video ref backed them up instead. VAR awarding a penalty which Sonny Kittel buried. Anssi Suhonen then curled in a fourth on 87’. Singh had five shots in this match, but nothing worthy of the match recaps – he was subbed with ten to play. Stink game from the fellas but at least Singh’s still ticking over those goal contribution stats. One of the few bright sparks according to the Regensburg fans.

Up Next: Saturday at 6.30am vs Dynamo (NZT)

Anna Leat – West Ham United (English Super League)

Conti Cup footy often means an opportunity for the backup keeper (it was in this competition that Erin Nayler made her only appearance for Reading last season). A month ago Anna Leat got handed her West Ham debut in a 1-0 win against London City Lionesses. This week she made appearance number two against Birmingham. Happy to report it all went pretty smoothly.

Leat was one of six changes to the side that drew 2-2 with Reading in the previous WSL fixture. Six changes but zero dramas as the Hammers were able to control the game for the most part, looking positive in attack and sturdy in defence. They almost took the lead in the 25th min when Claudia Walker had a shot pushed onto the post by the opposition goalie but a 39th min own goal eventually did the trick. Then two minutes later Walker collected the ball with her back to goal and turned to fire in a second.

Birmingham did have a few chances along the way. A couple long range strikes in the first half including an attempted cross that landed on the crossbar but Anna Leat looked comfortable with all that. The one time she was truly tested was early second half after a WHU defender slipped defending a free kick which allowed Louise Quinn, who’d earlier scored the OG, a free header at goal. Again though, Leat was up to the task...

Lucy Parker (75’) and Katerina Svitkova (77’) went on to add a couple of further goals for the Hammers and they ended up with a comfortable 4-0 win that all but guarantees a place in the knockouts, particularly with their positive goal difference. Anna Leat has played two games and kept two clean sheets. Olli Harder was a happy man afterwards. Here are some highlights.

Up Next: Nothing ‘til 13 December at 2am away to Everton (NZT)

Callum McCowatt, Elijah Just & Nando Pijnaker - FC Helsingør (Danish Division 1)

There are wins and then there are WINS. This was the latter for FCH, who blew Fremad Amager out of the water at their own home ground with two goals inside ten minutes – the second of those for Eli Just as he continues to tally up. Just was the only one of the kiwi contingent in the matchday squad for this one coming out of the international break and he delivered for the lot of them.

Sebastian Czajkowski (8’) had two minutes earlier got Helsingør up and running. Mikkel Knudsen then bagged another before the half was out (41’) and FCH were away laughing. Tonni Adamsen scoring on 57’ and the only bummer was that they lost their clean sheet in the last five mins. 4-1 the final score. With Hvidovre losing this week that means that FCH are now three points clear at the top of the division after 16 matches. Let’s celebrate with some fresh highlight videos...

There are Nando Pijnaker and Michael Woud efforts on that same channel too... as well as a couple other kiwi National League names you may recognise. Glad to see the agents putting in the work. Element Twelve isn’t mentioned on the channel but their logo is all over the intro to the vids so there you go. A few NZers are with that agency, actually. James McGarry, Ben Waine, Dalton Wilkins, and Max Mata for example.

Up Next: Locked on viewing, Helsingør vs HB Køge, Saturday at 7am (NZT)

Joe Bell – Viking FK (Norwegian Eliteserien)

They’re all big games at this stage. Viking trying to close out the season and potentially even push Molde for first place. But there have been signs of a bit of fatigue setting in lately, so while Haugesund were a team they would have expected to beat, expectations don’t win you football games.

Gianni Stensness had a decent crack in the eighth minute, punting a loose ball off a corner kick towards goal where it was acrobatically pushed over the bar by the keeper. However Viking would struggle to create chances like that throughout this game – it’d be nearly half an hour before their next proper attempt (Veton Berisha cutting in onto his right foot but his shot had the steam taken out of it by a deflection). Didn’t help seeing Zlatko Tripic go off injured either. In fact they would have been trailing by the time of that Berisha chance, Joe Bell missing an attempt to cut out a ball into the box and the shot coming in from Sondre Liseth. Thankfully Stensness had his Olympic buddy’s back with a brave headed block.

Thus the second half began with the score still at zeroes. A Joe Bell corner kick was nodded over the top by David Brekalo... while Haugesund blasted a great chance high from one of several instances where they were able to creep into the VFK area. It was a tensely poised game... until Simen Kvia-Egeskog got to the byline on the right edge and cut the ball back to Veton Berisha. The Viking captain’s first attempt was blocked but the ball fell back to him so he had another go. Boom. 1-0 to Viking after 59 minutes.

Problem is, this team doesn’t do things the easy way. A mere four minutes later David Brekalo slid in a split second late to concede a penalty. Kristoffer Velde sent the keeper the wrong way and we were back where we started.

Viking pushed on. Stensness put a header on target from a Bell corner but the keeper got his hands to it, Berisha’s follow-up then being deflected over the top somehow. Samuel Kari Fridjonsson couldn’t keep his effort down running onto one in the box. Berisha had another shot saved. There was a succession of corners. But Haugesund tightened up the screws in the last ten and VFK weren’t able to maintain that pressure. The game ended on a hopeful pot-shot from Joe Bell a mile out on the volley. 1-1 the final score. Highlights here.

Bell was really good. Lots of defensive presence and while he didn’t really spark much at the end of Viking’s attacking forays, other than the assist potential of his corner kicks (and he was taking most of them with Tripic off), he was instrumental in the early stages of many of those moves. But Viking fell short of a winner and Molde then won 4-1 against Rosenborg the following day to extend the gap between the two clubs to five points with three games left. That might just be the ship of second place sailing away now. Although VFK are also five points clear of fourth – helpfully the three teams directly below them (Rosenborg, Kristiansund & Lilleström) all lost this round meaning that third place is Viking’s to lose.

Up Next: Kristiansund vs Viking, Monday at 5am (NZT)

Olivia Chance - Celtic FC (Scottish Premier League)

The cup final qualification was taken care of last week. The Footy Ferns stuff will be taken care of next week. But the three points... that’s where this article lives. Celtic were up against Aberdeen and with 15 mins to go they were in big trouble. Trailing 1-0 thanks to a goal from Bayley Hutchison which came against the run of play but the Hoops only had themselves to blame. Plenty of wasted chances... many of them supplied by Liv Chance. There were at least four times she teed up a teammate for a shot prior to conceding but nothing that stuck.

Having lost to Rangers in their last league game, Celtic are already hanging at the back of the lead trio and a defeat here was simply not an option of they’re gonna maintain a title challenge. Thus all five subs were used in the second half with Celtic seeking a way back in, some kind of winning formula. Chance herself joined the miss party by putting one over the bar early second stanza – she played 90 mins btw, not a part of the substitution parade. One player who was brought on was Clarissa Larisey. Finally in the 79th minute, a bit of hustling from Larisey battling onto the end of a through ball allowed her to slip in an equaliser.

That was the spark they needed. Celtic threw themselves forward with confidence and this time Charlie Wellings set up Larisey to put the Ghirls in front on 86’. And then Cheyenne Shorts added another on 89’ with a header from a cross just to be sure of things. They left it late as they often have this season but a 3-1 win keeps them close to where they want to be. They would have had a massive match against Glasgow City next but for the international window. Instead they’ll face the same opponents a week later in that cup final.

Up Next: Glasgow City vs Celtic, Monday 6 Dec at 5.10am in the SWPL Cup Final (NZT)

Meikayla Moore – Liverpool (English Championship)

Didn’t play in the 3-1 win over Sunderland – which has the Reds four points clear at the top of the Champo table after 10 matches – but Moore did get a full game in the WSL Cup contest a couple days earlier. Up against Blackburn Rovers and the Reds took care of business with a 2-1 win.

Liverpool made nine changes to the team that beat Durham 2-0 to go top of the champo the previous weekend. Not that it slowed them down at all. They’d already had several chances to open the scoring when Jade Bailey bundled in from a corner kick on 29’. Blackburn only had two total shots all match. The Reds were in full control, with Moore even able to sneak a little further forward at times in the second half (as well as her usual attacking set piece prowess). There was one excellent through ball down the right wing from MM.

Taylor Hinds made it 2-0 on 50’ from another Missy Bo Kearns corner kick. They should have really scored a couple more but there were some bad misses in there. Then with five to play their young keeper played a poor ball out from the back and was beaten from range by Aimee Hodgson as Rovers made the scoreline a bit more scrappy than it ought to have been. Clean sheet spoiled but still a solid 2-1 win that sends the Reds top of the group and with a decent chance to advance. Extended highlights package right here.

Up Next: After the international break there’s another week off then it’s away to Sunderland in the WSL Cup on December 16 (NZT)

Katie Rood - Southampton (English National League Southern Premier)

Roodie didn’t play this one, she’d already set off for Footy Ferns duty thus had to miss it. However it’s still relevant as Southampton lost 2-0 to fellow promotion-scrappers Ipswich Town. Both teams came into the match with 100% winning records though the Saints had played a couple fewer games meaning there’s now a nine point gap between the two teams which is a bit of a worry. The reason this result is relevant? That was the first time that Southampton have ever lost a league match. They’d been cruising up the divisions since the women’s team was properly formed in 2017. Cup defeats, sure, but never in league competition... until now. Hell of a run.

Up Next: Next game KR will be around for is Saints vs MK Dons at 3am on Monday 6 December (NZT)

Nik Tzanev – AFC Wimbledon (English League One)

Portsmouth vs AFC Wimbledon and in the 24th minute of the match, Ollie Palmer slid a penalty kick down the middle to give the Dons the lead. Yet another set piece goal. The Dons managed to waste a few chances on either side of that banger but thanks to the efforts of Nik Tzanev in goal they were able to hold the lead well into the second half. Closing down 1v1s, shot-stopping, putting himself in harm’s way for the team (Tzanev needed a dose of treatment last first half in the process of one of his saves). All of the above from NT.

Unfortunately this was not gonna be a day for heroic goalkeeping status. In the 65th min, Pompey levelled as Tzanev got two hands to the shot from Michael Jacobs but wasn’t able to push it past the post. Tzanev continued to hold his own... yet there was nothing he could do about the effort from Marcus Harness in the 89th minute, cannoning in off the post. 2-1 to Portsmouth. Such is life.

Up Next: Dons vs Fleetwood, Sunday at 4am (NZT)

Ryan De Vries – Sligo Rovers (League of Ireland Premier Division)

Well, that’s that for another season. Pretty successful season too, rallying back from a disappointing European exit early on to surge back into continental qualification again next season with a third placed finish. They booked that spot with a couple games to spare so those last few were a bit more light-hearted, so it goes.

Rovers finished with a 1-1 draw against Bohemians. Ryan De Vries helped spark the goal with a forward ball picking out Johnny Kenny who then did some cool stuff before blasting in an excellent goal from outside the box. Technically you can call that an assist, right?

Sligo Rovers leading after 16 minutes... and they had their chances to add to that lead. Pity they didn’t take them. Kenny was a menace, hitting the crossbar on the half hour. He’s recently re-signed for the club and scored three times for Ireland U19s in the international break (though transfer interest remains from Leicester City, apparently). But Bohemians began to come into the contest more after that first half hour. They hit the bar themselves on 70 mins. Plenty of chances. Eventually they scored one. Georgie Kelly in the 78th minute – after RDV had been subbed off. All goods.

Ryan De Vries finishes with 3 goals for the season after appearing in 26 our of 36 matches (19 starts), playing predominantly on the wing. Solid campaign from him which got better as it went along – starting 12 of the final 13 LOI games. RDV’s contract comes to a conclusion at the end of the year but there is a mutual option for another season and it’s expected that Sligo Rovers will keep a pretty steady squad next time out. Seems optimistic.

Up Next: A well-earned break

James Musa – Phoenix Rising (American USL Championship)

Yeah go on then. The Moose has had his contract picked up for 2022 as well – decent week overall.

Up Next: Whatever the offseason entails

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