Flying Kiwis – August 30
Chris Wood - Newcastle United (English Premier League)
Chris Wood came into this season as a backup striker for Newcastle United with no illusions, just a determination to train hard, be a good teammate, and take his chances whenever they come around. Nothing screams ‘my turn’ for backup players in England more than a midweek early-round EFL Cup tie. Even better when it’s against a lower-tier opponent, like League Two’s Tranmere Rovers for example. Rovers hit up their game against Newcastle nestled directly between Grimsby Town and Colchester on the fourth-tier ladder (Max Crocombe and Tommy Smith’s clubs).
No surprises that Eddie Howe made ten changes from the Manchester City game, including Chris Wood up top-skees. Joe Willock was the only bloke who retained his spot. However despite settling into control of the game, Newcastle got quite the shock on 21’ as they conceded a wonderful flowing counter attacking goal with Elliott Nevitt doing the honours. 1-0 down against a team three divisions below them?
The worry continued as Emil Krafth went down with what looked like a serious knee injury later in the half... although the silver lining was that it meant Kieran Trippier came on at right back and it’s not often that a right back substitution completely changes the course of a game but that’s what happened here. It wasn’t long before Jamaal Lascelles won a header off a Tripper corner kick which was blocked but Lascelles banged in the rebound on 40’ to level things up. Tranmere were then lucky to escape a red card in 1H stoppage time for a sliding challenge on the keeper.
Chris Wood hadn’t had a major impact to that point. Working hard and holding the ball up nicely but there hadn’t been much service to speak of coming back in his direction... at least until Tripper came on. Seven minutes into the second half old mate Trips took another corner and this one was spot on perfect for the run of Woodsy to the near post. Boom. Pumped that sucker into the net for his first banger of the new campaign. Just what he needed after only 25 minutes of action over the first three EPL games.
Love it. Wood had another great chance on 67’ as Trippier lifted the ball over the top from deep. Wood’s pace didn’t really help him there but he was still in a great position to let it fly until he got a slight shove in the back that went unnoticed. Not a lot in it, just enough to force a miss-hit of his shot that was therefore easily saved. The defender, Kyle Jameson, got injured in the act.
From there on it was all Newcastle. They didn’t score again but the rest of Eddie Howe’s substitutions were all first team dudes brought on to ensure the win. The Magpies had all the ball. There was a shout for handball in his own area against Chris Wood but replays showed it came off his chest, no worries. A 2-1 win puts Newcastle into the next round and they got there via a Chris Wood winner. Kia kaha.
Good areas for The Woodsman because two days later the club signed Swedish international striker Alexander Isak from Real Sociedad for a club record transfer. Unlike some of the versatile forward prospects that Newcastle had been moving for, Isak is a legit number nine who’ll push Wood another place down the pecking order. So it goes, this was always gonna happen given the funds at the club’s disposal. Ideally it would’ve been next season but Callum Wilson’s latest hamstring injury was probably a catalyst for the club to act sooner – even though Wilson is only expected to miss a couple weeks.
But Alexander Isak didn’t get his work permit through in time for the weekend’s Premier League match which left The Woodsman as the only fit striker. The future is a bit more unclear than it was a week ago but Wood would get at least this one game to make a point... and of all the teams he could have played, Wolverhampton Wanderers were about perfect. The club he scored his PL hat-trick again. In fact he’d scored six goals in five previous PL games against Wolves.
An early half-chance fell his way as Joelinton stabbed a ball behind that Wood ran onto and tried to round the keeper but the angle was always against him and Jose Sarr was able to charge him down. 11 mins in he took a snapshot that was blocked but fell for Joe Willock in a hint of space, JW’s shot going just wide. Wood laid one off for Sean Longstaff which was charged down for a corner. A fine Trippier cross only just evaded Wood’s head.
Good positive signs for Newcastle... except the best chances had arguably been the few that fell for Wolves. Weren’t initially able to bury any of those but as the first half drew on the hosts seemed to find a comfort zone and 38 minutes into the match Ruben Neves did one of those things that he does: smashing the ball into the net from distance. A wonderful goal. Wolves up 1-0 at the break.
Things began similarly in the second half... but still Newcastle couldn’t work a clean enough sight at goal to tie things up and after 64 minutes Eddie Howe made a double change that included Ryan Fraser coming on for Chris Wood. Allan Saint-Maximin moving into the middle. Not a terrible outing from Wood but to be honest he hardly seemed to touch the ball. They didn’t even particularly use him as an aerial threat and the most memorable aspect of his second half was a foul tracking back on Nelson Semedo. An annoying yet understandable change from Eddie Howe seeking to shift up the focus of his team’s attack.
S’pose you’ve gotta say it worked too. It’s not that Newcastle were any better after those changes (and the ones that followed) but it did mean that ASM was in an area to strike as a poor clearance by Wolves fell just outside the box. Saint-Maximin whipped a superb volley into the bottom corner for the leveller. 90th minute of the match. Unreal. Even better than the Ruben Neves goal.
Newcastle also hit the crossbar deep in stoppage time through sub Elliot Anderson but they’ll settle for a 1-1 draw away from home. Keeps them undefeated to start the campaign. We’ll see how quickly Alexander Isak’s paperwork comes through but it’s a busy week upcoming for Newcastle United so we should still get a fair bit of Woodsman.
Up Next: Away to Liverpool on Thursday at 7am then home to Crystal Palace on Sunday at 2am (NZT)
Marko Stamenic – FC København (Danish Superliga)
Oh yes, get in. FC København are going to the Champions League group stages! The first time the club has made it that far since the 2016-17 season and they did it the hard way having to go to Turkey and grind out a nil-all draw against Trabzonspor.
It was the defending Danish champs against the defending Turkish champs (Trabzonspor last season won their first title for 38 years – they’d finished second six times across that span). Only one change from the first leg for FCK, having won that game 2-1. That was Ajax-loanee Mohamed Daramy coming in on the left wing so no miracle promotion for Marko Stamenic... but he was on the bench again thanks to those UCL extended matchday squads.
The atmosphere was typically incredible. FCK dudes were getting jeered every time they touched the ball as Trabzonspor came out swinging, forcing Mat Ryan into a massive save inside five mins denying Djaniny 1v1. Rasmus Falk shinned a decent look for FCK on 11’ but that effort was very much against the run of play. Soon Ryan was back in action tipping an Andreas Cornelius header over the top – Cornelius is actually a Copenhagen native who had two separate spells with FCK back in the day.
København were more settled after getting through that first half hour unscathed. Their defence was winning the first contact for pretty much every cross into the area (and there were a lot of them) and a few sneaky chances of their own began to develop. They made it through the first half. They made it through to the hour mark. So far so good although the tide was threatening to turn, Cornelius spinning and firing wide on 67’ as well as a deflected header from a corner superbly saved by Ryan moving one way then diving back the other, amongst other moments.
But despite having three times as many shots as their opponents and 64% of possession, Trabzonspor didn’t have enough in attack to break down the Danish side. No need for Marko Stamenic this time but you’d best believe he was amongst the celebrations. A 0-0 draw was just what the doctor ordered – into the UCL group stages. How about this for a group...
The first matchday is next week so it’s straight into it for the fellas. Marko Stamenic vying to become only the fifth kiwi bloke to play UCL following on from Kim Wright, Wynton Rufer, Danny Hay, and Chris Killen. 2007-08 was the most recent of those. Of course, first Stamenic has gotta make the cut for the Copenhagen squad list (to be submitted before 10am on Saturday). That can get a little funky as there are levels to those squad lists and Stamenic is one season shy of being eligible as a locally trained or a List B player, which would have made his inclusion a near-certainty, but based on selections so far he should hopefully sneak into the 25-man List A squad.
He snuck onto the team-sheet for the Superliga match away to FC Nordsjælland on Monday morning. First time he’s been on the bench for a league game in a couple weeks, lovely to see. Stamenic even got himself a fifteen minute cameo out there on the park... although this was not one of the good days.
10 minutes gone, FCN took the lead as they won the ball in midfield and transitioned straight into attack with Andreas Schjelderup smacking a goal in off the post. Then in the 25th minute Mat Ryan rushed out to his right to shut down one attacker (after a slick move took FCN into the area) but the ball deflected to Mohammed Diomande who could simply head the ball into the vacant space at the near post for 2-0. At least the goal that Nordsjælland seemed to have scored from a corner five mins into the second half was disallowed for a handball.
Marko Stamenic came on after 76 mins in place of right winger Haraldsson, sparking a change in shape with Stammers playing centrally although almost as a number ten, much further forward than we’ve seen him play for this team before. Clearly the plan was to use his strength and height in search of a goal. He chested one down running into the area soon after coming on, holding the ball up successfully. He also made sure to drill a shot with the first opportunity he got although his left footed effort went miles over. Not to mention the times he drove the ball forwards in possession to support his strikers.
Copenhagen created a few chances amongst all that. Some good footy on display. But what happened was they conceded a third goal on the break just as stoppage time began, Oliver Antman doing the honours for FCN. Pep Biel did pull one back right at the very end scoring from a penalty that he himself had won (Stamenic with a smooth progressive pass earlier in the move) but a 3-1 loss means that the defending champs have lost four of their opening six Superliga matches. They’re into the Champions League though. That’s a worthy consolation.
Up Next: 5am on Saturday they play Silkeborg at home (NZT)
Jacqui Hand - Åland United (Finnish Kansallinen Liiga)
What’s this, another Jacqui Hand goal? Of course there was another Jacqui Hand goal.
This was her sixth of the season to go with three assists (playing from the midfield too), not bad for her first gig as a pro. Hand scored the second goal in what ended up being a 4-0 Åland United win over FC Honka – a tidy finish on 24 mins – with Anna Westerlund (13’) and Kit Loferski (36’ & 59’) supplying the other goals. Hand was subbed for the last fifteen minutes with the job well and truly done.
That win means Åland finish the main stage of the season in fourth place, three points behind PK-35 Vantaa who are third and nine points ahead of PK-35 who are fifth. Those are two different teams, by the way. Not a typo. There’s an international break next, then the league resumes with the Championship Rounds: five more games, one each against the rest of the top six. Hopefully AU can get up to third by the end of all that.
Up Next: Away to HJK at 11pm on Saturday 10 September (NZT)
Callum McCowatt - FC Helsingør (Danish Division 1)
Cup game footy in the midweek against top division side Lyngby. One of the teams that got promoted ahead of them after FCH’s late season capitulation. Only way to respond to that kinda carnage is to go out there and whup them and who should have given Helsingør the lead early in the second half but old mate Callum McCowatt...
It had been a gentle sorta first half with few chances to speak of but after McCowatt pounced on that loose ball in the 47th minute FCH had a lead to anchor their performance. The defence locked in and survived a few scares. Callum McCowatt got hit in the face by a free kick and after a bit of treatment would need to be replaced. But the lads got it done without him as Alexander Lyngby lashed in a second on 72’ and FCH were able to claim a 2-0 victory to take them into the third round of the Danish Cup.
Then Callum McCowatt also did this on the weekend in the 1.Division game away to HB Køge...
A goalie mistake on nine mins meant that Jubril Adedeji was able to slip in an easy one to give HB Køge the lead but Helsingør came to life later in the half as the in-form Alexander Lyng twice found space in the box the pounce dashing in from the right edge. Absolutely smashed the first one on 36’. Then in injury time came that gorgeous dink over the top from Callum McCowatt and the big stretch got it done.
FCH came out and scored early in the second half through Mikkel Knudsen before Liam Jordan killed things off with a fourth on 62’. HBK did get one back soon after. McCowatt was subbed for the last quarter of an hour. 4-2 was the final score as FCH continue to make amends for that awful start. That’s four wins in a row in all comps currently. Only one point off third place – although Vejle have won 7/7 to start so they’re pulling clear up the top.
Up Next: Home to Nykøbing at 5am on Saturday (NZT)
Indiah-Paige Riley - Fortuna Hjørring (Danish Kvindeligaen)
This was the first meeting this season between the two prospective title challengers: HB Køge vs Fortuna Hjørring. Crucial points on the line even if it’s still only early days. However the match was spoiled a little by the absence of Daisy Cleverley from the HBK squad. Might be a slight injury knock, hopefully nothing too serious ahead of the Footy Ferns tour (or indeed HBK’s upcoming Champions League qualifiers). We’ll see. But Indi Riley got ninety for FH which was helpful. Right wingback again for her.
Like many of these kinda games, it was decided by a single moment. Big ball over the top by HBK in the 24th minute from which Cecilie Fløe managed to sneak between defender and goalkeeper to get a shot away and there ya go. FH had gone closest to that point, forcing a diving save up the other end, but HBK had probably shaded the run of play. Fortuna had a great chance to level up soon afterwards that went wide. HBK should have ended it with a goal towards the end as they pounced upon FH’s desperation. 1-0 was the way it ended. HB Køge remain perfect to start the season though for Fortuna Hjørring that’s now three defeats in a row including their disappointing UCL quals last week.
Up Next: There’s a Danish Cup second rounder for FH away to Aarhus on Tues 6 Sep but Indi Riley will miss that one with Footy Ferns duty
Meikayla Moore – Glasgow City (Scottish Premier League)
Far from clinical for Glasgow City against Aberdeen but they did the thing that mattered most by winning. 2-1 was the score. Full game for Meikayla Moore at the back as the top three teams in Scotland have all remained perfect through four rounds. City took the lead via a 12th minute own goal but had trouble adding to that. Meanwhile Aberdeen had already rocked the crossbar in the first half so their 62nd min equaliser wasn’t completely out of the blue.
Unfortunately it was a Moore mistake that led to the goal. Misplayed a pass at the back and was dispossessed. The GC keeper did well to save the initial 1v1 and Moore tracked back to force the move wide in the aftermath however a cross still came back in and Francesca Ogilvie made sure of her effort for 1-1. Moore was then replaced on 68’ as defence was sacrificed for attack... and almost immediately Emily Whelan finished off a mint move for the eventual winner.
That was actually the second game this week for Glasgow City who also had a league catch-up to play after their Champions League stuff. That was against promoted side Dundee United. Meikayla Moore was rested from the starting team but came on at half-time with her team already 5-0 up. They’d win 7-0 in the end.
Up Next: Week off for internationals, then it’s a city derby against Glasgow Women on Monday 12 Sep at 1am (NZT)
Olivia Chance - Celtic FC (Scottish Premier League)
“I had a busy schedule last summer and even this June I had internationals, so I had a few niggles and we just wanted to clear them up and take a bit of time away from the field in the gym. I've been doing a lot of running so it's nice to be back touching the ball and it was good to have my first start and get into it again.”
Last week was the first start for Liv Chance as she eases into the new season. This week was her first ninety minute performance. It was also probably Celtic’s best showing so far and that might not be a coincidence. They absolutely smoked Motherwell 8-0. Even more incredible considering this game kicked off just a couple hours after the men’s side had a 9-0 win over Dundee United. What a day for that club.
Chance didn’t score any of the eight but she was still heavily influential. The first goal came as Clarissa Larisey followed up on a Liv Chance shot that’d been saved. There was also a shot past the post early second half and another into the sidenetting near the end. Potentially more too but Celtic aren’t putting up highlights packages until halfway through the week so you may have to check The Niche Cache’s Twitter/Instagram feeds to see if there’s video of any additional Chance assists. Regardless, an emphatic win against a team that Glasgow City needed a stoppage time goal to beat a couple weeks back.
Elsewhere Vic Esson was twice an unused sub this week as Rangers won 2-0 against Hearts and 5-0 against Hamilton Accies. Two SWPL games on the trot in which Jenna Fife has been the starting keeper, following on from Esson playing both UCL qualifiers as well as the league game prior. They’ve each started three games this season so it looks like it’ll be a goalkeeping tag team moving forward. They’ve also only conceded one goal in those six games combined (in the 3-1 UCL win over Ferencváros) so it’s not too big of a worry whoever plays.
Plus a couple of starts for Katie Rood. The first was in that 2-0 loss to Rangers but the second was a 3-0 win over Glasgow Women. Roodie almost scored a blinder in the first half spinning past a defender with a flick-touch but shooting just wide but a couple set piece goals set them up nicely anyway. Then Rood produced a wonderful touch and turn on the left wing before lifting in the cross for the third goal. That’s the way it’s done.
Up Next: Dundee United vs Celtic on Monday 12 September at 1am (NZT)
Ali Riley - Angel City FC (American National Women’s Soccer League)
Ali Riley mic’d up. Should just do this every week.
As for the week’s football, it was a frisky one against Gotham FC. DiDi Haracic made a typically excellent save early on to deny Ifeoma Onumonu before scraping another Onumona effort, this time deflected, off the line soon after. Potentially even from over the line. Replays aren’t conclusive and there’s no VAR in the NWSL anyway but this definitely looked like it might have crossed... although the funniest part was the ref randomly awarding a corner kick.
That may have been a turning point because before too much longer Savannah McCaskill had scored a beauty up the other end (16’) with a baseline nutmeg and a low-angled finish. Then Cari Roccaro added a second on 25’ courtesy of an easy finish after some great work from Simone Charley. And on 31’ it was triples via Claire Emslie with a dipping shot from distance.
Gotham did get a goal back early in the second half and it came from an Ali Riley error, her attempted clearance in the six yard box hitting her shin and bouncing back into danger. It wasn’t the best Riley performance to be fair. Lost the ball a few too many times and her passing was unusually inaccurate. But she still did the business in a 3-1 victory. Exactly what they needed to stay in the hunt for the playoffs. Get amongst the highlights.
Up Next: Away to Houston Dash on Monday 12 Sep at 11am (NZT)
Abby Erceg – North Carolina Courage (American National Women’s Soccer League)
Double gameweek for NCC as they try to catch up on a heap of postponed games. They’ve got another rescheduled game next week too despite the international break – which is probably why Abby Erceg and Katie Bowen are unavailable for the Football Ferns games despite them taking place in California. Even though Bowen has only played about one NWSL minute for NCC all year. If they don’t at least give her a run off the bench in one of these upcoming games then it’s going to be extremely rude.
Bowen didn’t play in either game this week. First was a 3-1 win over Portland Thorns which meant back to back NWSL wins for only the second time this year for the Courage. Huge areas. Goals for Diana Ordonez (24’) and Debinha (50’) had them in a fine position. Portland then pulled one back in the 63rd... but Meredith Speck clinched the points with an 83rd min goal.
But points were dropped against an in-form Kansas City team a few days later. An early penalty meant they were trailing after five mins but a double for Kerolin had it 2-1 to NCC after 48 minutes. Until two goals leaked in the space of three minutes blew that one apart and they lost 3-2. The Courage did have a good go at trying to find a leveller near the end but to no avail. The only consistent thing about this team in 2022 is that they consistently refuse to let Katie Bowen play. Full games for Erceg but she won’t be happy with the number of goals this team continues to allow.
Up Next: Away to Gotham FC on Monday at 9am (NZT)
Bill Tuiloma – Portland Timbers (American Major League Soccer)
Always enjoy a good derby match, Portland vs Seattle being no exception. Always enjoy it more when Bill Tuiloma’s involved... which he was here, given the start at right back curiously enough. It’s a position he’s played before for this team although not from the start very often. Not a bad way to wedge him into the line-up though.
Portland threatened first as Zac McGraw struck a heavy volley off target but Seattle scored first as Yeimar Gomez Andrade leapt highest at the far post to power home a header in the eighth minute. The Timbers weren’t disturbed. Bill Tuiloma lined up a free kick which he struck gorgeously well but Stefan Frei was able to dive across and hold it. The chances kept coming, leading to a penalty for POR with five to play in the half. Dairon Asprilla buried that bad boy. Then five minutes after the half Seb Blanco put the Timbers in front as he finished off a dinked free kick move after the ball was nodded across goal.
The Timbers should really have scored more but they weren’t at their most clinical leaving the door open for the Sounders to make a late go of it. Seattle hadn’t really forged anything of note since their goal but in the 85th minute they rocked a header off the crossbar which Portland only just scrambled clear. But that was the big chance. Nothing else came as close as that. Portland Timbers with the 2-1 derby win. Bill Tuiloma with ninety minutes. Here, have a trophy...
Meanwhile, funny story, here’s some fan video that’s emerged of a Bill Tuiloma free kick from last week...
Yeah, he struck that one pretty well.
Up Next: A Thursday/Monday double-header... away to Austin at 1pm on Thurs then home to Atlanta at 9.30am on Mon (NZT)
Michael Boxall – Minnesota United (American Major League Soccer)
With a dozen minutes remaining, Minnesota United were trailing 1-0 to Houston Dynamo. They’d been going alright in the first half with the better of the few chances that had emerged but then they got got by a Corey Baird goal in stoppage time after a raking long ball found him unmarked. The Loons picked up where they left off but still the goals eluded them and defeat was lurking closer and closer.
Then an Emanuel Reynoso free kick was deflected in for an own goal on 79’ and five minutes later they won the damn thing. Reynoso on the right wing. Slipped a ball underneath for Alan Benítez. That fella put a square ball low into the area where Luis Amarilla was lurking. Amarilla did the rest. A 2-1 win for Minnesota United. Three wins on the trot. Minny are all the way up to third in the Western Conference and it’s starting to feel like Michael Boxall is going to be a key player for a team intending to go very deep in the playoffs.
Up Next: Thursday at 1.30pm away to Real Salt Lake; Sunday at 7.30am against FC Dallas (NZT)
Marco Rojas – Colo-Colo (Chilean Primera División)
Colo-Colo were 1-0 up after sixty minutes away to Unión La Calera when Marco Rojas took his place next to the fourth official. Summoned to enter the match with a 26th minute Gabriel Costa penalty kick having put his team into the ascendency. But there was no fairy tale impact this time such as he had in his debut. Rojas was limited in what he could get up to. Did have one shot on target but didn’t do much else.
Then Colo-Colo conceded two late goals to end up losing, Christian Vilches with both of them. 84th minute header from a corner after CC’s goalie had tumbled over. Plus a winner on 90+6’ via another corner kick and another header. This time the keeper stayed on his line and it also didn’t help him. The Colocinos are still comfortably clear at the top of the ladder but this was surely a wake-up call for them following on from their cup exit last week.
Up Next: Friday at 10am against Unión Española (NZT)
George Stanger – Alloa Athletic (Scottish League One)
Good mahi from George Stanger. The NZ youth international seems to be settling in smoothly this season having converted his Alloa Athletic loan into a permanent move a few months back. Starting every game so far, generally playing on the right of a back three. AA have won two of those five games so not really looking like a promotion challenger at this stage but who knows what’ll happen if Stanger keeps popping up at the back stick like that.
This is also a good opportunity to remind you of a fun fact about George Stanger: thanks to his move to Alloa Athletic at the start of the year he’s now played in each of the top four tiers of Scottish league football. He completed the set when he was only 21 years old.
Up Next: Trip to Clyde on the weekend, Sunday at 2am (NZT)
Zac Jones – Haverfordwest County (Welsh/Cymru Premier)
It was back in January that Zac Jones, former WeeNix goalie (who sat on the bench several times for the A-League side), joined Welsh top division club Haverfordwest County. Nine unused sub apps didn’t result in a debut last season but he did sign a contract extension to stay there this term as well and after a couple more unused sub stints he was finally rewarded with an actual professional debut. Between the Phoenix and HW County it only took until the 19th time that he made a matchday squad for him to actually play.
That’s the life of a young goalkeeper. Just gotta take your chances when they come around and Jonesy was all class in keeping a clean sheet in a 3-0 win over Airbus UK. That goal difference boost against the only team yet to pick up a point through three weeks means that Haverfordwest County are currently top of the Cymru Premier table with two wins and a draw. Very early days, granted.
Up Next: Wednesday at 6.45am away to Penybont (NZT)
Niko Kirwan – Calcio Padova (Italian Serie C)
Nothing but bad news here. An ACL injury for Niko Kirwan means he’ll be out of action for many months to come, his season potentially over when it had only just begun. Kirwan had been great for Padova last season. He played in 34 Serie C matches as they won the third tier League Cup and finished second in their conference before progressing all the way to the promotion playoff final which they lost while Kirwan was on international duty with the All Whites (for the World Cup qualifier vs Costa Rica... which his team also lost).
But one measly Italy Cup appearance might well be the extent of his 2022-23 season. Horrible injury for any player at any time. Here’s hoping he comes back stronger and that Padova get promoted while he’s out. Proper bummer that this also comes not too long after Francis De Vries suffered an ACL tear for his Swedish club Värmano.
Up Next: The long road to recovery
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