At least we didn’t lose this one like we did that time in Honiara. Other than that, though, it has to be said that there wasn’t a whole lot to cheer about during a grinding 90 minutes in this Nations Cup semi-final. On a grander stage the All Whites might be applauded for a solid, compact performance and a 1-0 victory against the run of play but honestly this was New Caledonia and the All Whites truly could not have done less on their way to the win.

Two things on that: the first is that they weren’t trying to be expansive in any way, it was all about a result and I definitely have some further thoughts on that approach that’ll come through in the next 2500 words. The second thing is that it’s unlikely we see Anthony Hudson’s team trying to play this way in any other situation. Come the home legs in the World Cup qualifying against the same teams they’ll probably play with more flair and confidence. In friendlies against better teams you’d imagine they try a few more things as well (or else dammit what is Hudson even doing? May as well go back to Mr Herbert). So as long as they keep squeezing out these results (just… one… more… win…) then we can put it all to bed and hope that the behind the scenes footy was a lot better. No reason to panic, we’ll forget this game as soon as the next one starts.

The intentions were clear from the first game of the tournament so there was no reason any one ought to have been shocked by the team that was named. Sure, Marco Rojas is a far, far better player than Luka Prelevic. Like, not even in the same ballpark at this time (Luka’s a young player, he’s new on this scene). But he’s bigger and more physical, the type of player that’ll get stuck in when Rojas might drift out of things – especially when he’s watching the ball pumped over his head to the strikers all day. Doubt he was too chuffed to be left out of the squad but you could see what Hudson’s though process was at least, whether we agree with it or not.

He’s committed to his route one strategy. Back in came almost everyone else from the Fiji game as well, so there was no room for Kosta Barbarouses. Chris Wood was fit to start, Fallon beside him and McGlinchey and Tuiloma in midfield with Prelevic. The only change in the backline from that opener was that Mike Boxall was available and he started at right back. Odd thing with Prelevic though… he wasn’t even in the squad initially. He trained with them in Australia (as did keeper Michael Woud) but he didn’t join in officially until Shane Smeltz and Clayton Lewis were ruled out. So… would Lewis have played his part otherwise? Probably. But given certain comments by Hudson about first and second units (he pretty much admitted to playing the reserves in the Solomons game – which not coincidentally was the best footy they played all competition) it’s funny that he came from out of the loop to being shoehorned into the top team. He won’t play in the final though, that’ll be interesting to see where that goes. Hudson might be forced to open up a bit, god-forbid. More on that later.

Oh, Prelly. 84 seconds into the game he found his way onto the ball six yards out after a poor defensive header from a long Tui throw had fallen at his feet and he slapped it right at the keeper. Not an open goal – if it were then there wouldn’t have been a keeper to save it, right? – but something close to that. Bloody hell, we really could have used an early goal.

Hey how come they let Fred De Jong do the telly coverage? Before the last game he even did a little preview bit with a few quotes from NZ players but it strikes me as strange that the players would ever accept a bit of screen time with FDJ given how some of them were actually in that Pacific Games team that was disqualified thanks to an eligibility scandal which came directly from an unacceptable level of incompetence from a unit working under De Jong’s leadership. He resigned because of it. He cost them a trip to the Olympics. I realise it’s OFC’s coverage but it ain’t a great look. Neither is the fact that neither Lewis nor Smeltz have been replaced in the squad list on their graphics. Nor some of the supposed post-game ‘interviews’. But it’s better to be able watch these games than not, I guess. As long as the picture quality is decent, and Gordon Glen Watson does a decent enough job on the commentary.

As for Fred, at one point he uttered the words: “Fallon with a good clean header”. Mate, Rory Fallon is a good player (in the right circumstances, another point to come back to) but when he goes up for a header it’s either ‘good and dirty’ or it’s ‘bad’. There is no ‘good and clean’ or in between.

Nothing really happened for a while after Prelevic’s miss. After a tease of a decent performance in the last game (in their worst result, although the Solomons were good value), this was immediately back to the initial approach. In fact it was the culmination of it all, defenders playing so damn deep and midfielders playing off the ball but not on it. The strikers hovering way forward and jumping for long balls. With no support because everyone else is so deep and there’s no width. It’s abysmal football to watch, we’re playing the friggin’ spoilers against New Caledonia. Yes, the mighty New Caledonia. I know we lost to them back in 2012 or whenever but jeeeeezus. Not a risk was taken.

Again, I can understand the thinking. Hudson says he doesn’t want to underestimate the island competition but in a lot of ways that’s exactly what he’s doing. He’s sending this team out there to disrupt the game. That way all the variables are shattered into dust and at the end of 90 minutes the difference will be that we can complete the basics better. And of course we can, our team is the one stacked with established professionals. Our finishing will be the difference, our set piece ability and our defensive structure. And in the end it was… just. The problem is that people have to watch that trash. Plus we should be able to play these guys off the park anyway, that shouldn’t be such a risk.

Quarter of an hour in we had our first scare of many to follow. Themi gave the ball away clumsily and Jean Philippe Saiko ran away with it. Luke Adams stepped across to slow him down and Themi was able to catch up with a ruthless challenge that probably should have seen him earn a yellow but instead was waved play-on by the ref. Yeah, alrighty then. Meanwhile Prelevic went through a 5-10 minute stretch where he lost the ball every time he got it, be that through a good tackle or a poor pass or a heavy touch. All were on display, unfortunately. Tui wasn’t as bad but he gave the ball away a few times himself. It was all so hard to watch – some of that is the fault of an increasingly deteriorating pitch (every game’s been held at the old Sir John Guise Stadium), part of it was down to the tactical approach meaning that nobody was bothering to move around and offer an option. Hurry up and pump the ball long, you muppet! Yeah, not ideal, but there’s only one more game of this that we have to sit through and at least there’ll be a prize on the line there.

Saiko had another chance that he volleyed wide. New Caledonia clearly lacked the same ability in front of goal but they seemed to have a shoot on sight policy, meanwhile the NZL team wasn’t creating anything at all. The odd long throw or a couple of corners played low but aside from that there was nothing happening – certainly nothing from open play. Prelevic was booked after some persistent fouling. In the 31st minute there was a real heart-in-mouth moment when Loic Wakanumune’s acrobatic effort was blocked by Brotherton but looped up behind him and there was a second there when it could have gone anywhere and Marinovic, for the first time in the tournament, looked wrong-footed. It bounced wide… and exhale.

But that was the worry. As long as we were playing this poorly we ran the risk of some fluke goal flying into the net and suddenly we’d have to chase the game while they had something to defend. That didn’t eventuate but there were a few times when it would only have taken a lucky bounce or a missed call from the officials. Kip Colvey copped a yellow right before the break.

Tips for the #AllWhites in the 2nd half:
- get the ball to Wood's feet
- try string 3 passes together
- maybe bring Rojas on#NZLvNCL
— The Niche Cache (@thenichecache) June 8, 2016

We got through to half-time with the score at 0-0 and only 40% of possession. 4 shots to their 12 and 13 fouls to their 6. The ref definitely called this one pretty tight for the most part and that wasn’t great for NZ, too many annoying whistles breaking up the play even more than we were. But a lot of that also came from Hudson’s supposed high pressing. It’s a bit of a myth, still there were times when players went rushing in on NC defenders and midfielders… and fouling them. A proper press is more about enclosing the ball into small spaces that they can’t play out of, not rushing in like madmen and getting physical. Try force a bad pass rather than a desperate tackle and we probably would have won 3-0 all from cheap turnovers.

Luka Prelevic was mercifully removed at HT and on came Python Patterson. Something had to change. A few minutes into the second stanza, Tui got smashed in a challenge. Free kick. Woody lined it up and judging by the run up he was absolutely eyeing up a blast at goal. He didn’t smash it, but he did give it some of that Cristiano Ronaldo whip and Jelen Ixoee made a complete mess of it in goal. He more or less flipped it into his own net, quite the shocker.

#LUFC Chris Wood v New Caledonia #NZLvNCL #ONC pic.twitter.com/aAKLUHSu58
— #WALMOT (@WALMOT3) June 8, 2016

What a time to score. Well, for the result anyway, coz what the goal meant was that the All Whites didn’t need to find a solution to the way they were playing. It got better in the second half as a few more ball-players came into the fold but it was never good. Yet they were winning, so no probs. Given how rarely we threatened the New Caledonian net it would have been an interesting alternate universe experiment to see what would have happened if it was still 0-0 after 70 mins, would Rojas have been introduced? Would we have been a little more adventurous? We’ll never know, sadly/thankfully.

55 minutes in, NC could have levelled if only Bertrand Kai had taken his shot earlier. The one time they hesitated in front of goal was the best chance they had, the burden of the clean net too causing a brief paralysis of the trigger-finger. Mari saved it well with his legs.

McGlinchey did some nice things in getting through on the keeper from the left (brilliant ball by Chris Wood) but his touch to beat the defender was too much and the goalie got there first. Then Rory Fallon shot high over the bar from another low cut-back corner (which is made possible by that thing they do with everyone standing in the six yard box for corners). Bertrand Kai had a couple other half-efforts at the other end. To be honest, we were lucky to be ahead.

In the 69th minute the New Caledonians did manage to get the ball in the net but it came from a foul. Mari had made a quality parried save and was fouled on the follow-up catch. Zero dramas there, clear as day. That one came after Themi gave away a free kick that got him his yellow card – meaning that he and Prelevic (after his own earlier yellow) will miss the final through suspension. Losing two players like that is a blow to any coach going into a final but in this case it’s a relief. Themi’s lack of pace has been exposed on several occasions while Luka P had nothing short of a nightmare here and probably would have been dropped anyway. In their places will come somebody slightly better suited to holding the ball, ideally Rojas and Hudson-Wihongi based on the Solomons game, though Boxall could move central and Patterson was the first man off the bench here. Either way is fine by me, matey.

Tuiloma was dragged off with twenty to play. Man, I love him as a player but this has been a poor tournament so far, probably showing the effects of a season in which he didn’t play a lot of footy. Kosta came on for him, playing as an attacking mid. Then Colvey hurt his shoulder landing hard on a diving defensive header. He needed a bit of treatment and after Wood’s injury, that was a worry. But five minutes later he was taking a long throw in so all goods. Monty Patterson made a late tackle in the box, good-o.

Te Atawhai Hudson-Wihongi replaced Fallon with a couple minutes left. Shore up the middle, Fallon didn’t really do anything but give away fouls this game. As much as the twin towers formation with Wood and Fallon sounds like a massive aerial advantage, it looked like a mess here. Fallon’s strength is in flicking the ball on, Wood’s is holding it up. When Rory was with Kosta they were lighting fires as Fallon flicked the ball onto Kosta running in behind him. Wood holds to the last man, he doesn’t run in behind and those balls were all lost. Similarly Wood would rather you run past him or get wide when he gets the ball with his back to goal and Fallon wasn’t doing that. We also saw the same dilemma in the third game as Kosta and Brockie undermined each other by both looking to run in behind, neither coming towards the ball much and all we got was a flurry of offsides. The lesson here is that it’d be way more effective to pair one giant with one runner, gotta mix the strikers.

We won the game. Scored a lucky goal from a keeping howler and protected a clean sheet so that it was all we needed. The All Whites finished with only 37% of possession. They trailed 8-23 in the shot counts and led 25-11 in the foul count. All pathetic statistical reflections on what Hudson described as “a bad night”. But look, “It’s all about winning at this stage.” That’s the truth and that’s what we did so we can only be so critical. At least Hudson was honest about the performance afterwards. The only worry was when he praised the “character” of the side. Uh-oh…

(BTW, see how the intro graphic on that linked character vid is the same as the ONC TV coverage? Hahaha, what a coincidence that was – must’ve used the same royalty free graphics site or something.)

We’ll play Papua New Guinea in the final. The hosts advanced through the other group and it’ll be their first ever appearance in an ONC final. Should be a lot of fun. (It won’t be… but it should be).