Flying Kiwis will keep you up to date on the endeavours of New Zealand sports folk overseas. Not the battlers, mind you, but the genuine overlooked and underappreciated superstars that for some ridiculous reason don’t get a look in on local media.
Another week gone in the Premier league and once again we have so much to talk about such as the form of our front runners in the Champions League, the relegation battle which is like no other and of course Liverpool’s red hot form. With only 11 games left to go this season, here is a preview of the weeks games as the going is about to get tough
Hero of the Week:
Hero of the week has to be Giroud after his influential performance and double against Sunderland. Arsenal have always had great build-up play and can rarely be accused of lacking creativity but you still need a man in the box to put the ball in the net and Giroud came up trumps. He also got an assist by flicking the ball on for Rosicky to score a brilliantly worked goal to add to his 2 goals. With the Frenchman being Arsenal's main striker, he could well prove to be their most important player as they chase the top spot - they need him scoring. His link-up play, holding up of the ball, his big stature, and his work-ethic cause mayhem for defenses and this adds another dimension to the Gunners attack.
“Yeah mate, go on” I respond.
Sam whips out the golf club that’s propped up against the bed, holding the dodgy fridge shut. The door’s opened, two Exports are removed; one handed to myself, one remaining in the grasp of the welcome visitor.
Flying Kiwis will keep you up to date on the endeavours of New Zealand sports folk overseas. Not the battlers, mind you, but the genuine overlooked and underappreciated superstars that for some ridiculous reason don’t get a look in on local media.
So, what’s been happening in Wellington? The big news over the last few days has been Brendon McCullum and the Black Caps, and deservedly so. What a cracking effort - conjuring one of the great Test match draws at the Basin Reserve. Well of course with all those records being broken, no bandwagon-jumping media firm had time to squawk about what was taking place just down the road… So here’s what went on in the world of the Wellington Phoenix, in the last 7 days…
This is proving to be the most open Premier League season ever, but while most people are focussed on the sprint to the finish line at the top of the table, they’re missing out on the tightest scrap of all, the battle to avoid relegation.
2 months. That’s how long we’ve been waiting for the glorious Champions League (CL) to come back into our lives. This means midweek football and everyone’s favourite Heineken ad’s back on TV!
If you have not seen the performance or highlights of the Liverpool vs Arsenal game then you need to, even if you don't like football. The first half is a masterclass of attacking pace and movement while also a perfect demonstration of how a team can crumble under intense pressure. Liverpool were pressing Arsenal high up the pitch from the very second the ref blew the whistle and Arsenal just couldn't cope...
Flying Kiwis will keep you up to date on the endeavours of New Zealand sports folk overseas. Not the battlers, mind you, but the genuine overlooked and underappreciated superstars that for some ridiculous reason don’t get a look in on local media.
He’s back! After 17 games out, in which the Hammers conceded 40 goals, Winnie made his return off the bench, playing 11 minutes in the 2-0 win over Swansea. Kevin Nolan scored a first half double, and Reid helped steady the show late on after Andy Carroll was sent off (Fat Sam was not happy) with half an hour remaining.
Well listen to me pal. You aren’t going anywhere with that below-average looking gal of yours, because you’ve got new plans. The Wellington Fucken Phoenix are in town and they’re here to par-tay. Saturday night at Eden Park will have the stadium lights glowin’ and the overpriced drinks a-flowin’. And guess what – YOU sir, have the chance to be there. Slam some post-match jager bombs with Paul Ifill, or a half-time Double Brown wizard stick with Benny Siggy.
Doesn't that just sound like a dream night out? Yes, yes it does. So ditch that hoe, txt the boys, smash back some beer and watch some absolute world class footy.
Now you might be asking yourself “Why should I listen to this guy? What does he know about livin in the struggle? We can’t all afford them high class gold plated Eden Park tickets!” Well mate, you’re in luck. For a mere $30, you’ll be grinding the upright with Manny Muscat during the defensive corners. You’ll be counting the stacks of cash you’ve saved with the official WPHNX crew – the YELLLOOOOW FEEEEEVEERRRRRR!!!! But don’t hold onto that cash too tightly. No, because after 80 minutes, you’ll wanna to make it raaaaaiiiiin over all those hotties whippin' their tight shirts off! Yeeeeyaaaah!!I 100% guarantee that by heading along to the Nix vs Adelaide, you’re gonna get a promotion, take home a super model & win the lotto.
Yeah so a lot of that is a lie, but not the message I’m trying to send.
Mmmm yeah... Hotties...
If you live in Auckland, this is a great chance to see some in-form, above-standard-NZ-quality football. No, it won’t be Premier League quality, and perhaps that’s the reason so many people diss the Nix & the A-League – but it’s common knowledge that being at the game & getting involved with a bit of hoo-ha is waaaaay better. “Aw yeah but I’d just rather have a quiet beer at home on the couch and watch it”. Oh yeah? Harden up, pussy.
Most of you won’t have seen live Wellington Phoenix before, because only hardcore ninjas will fly to Wellington. This weekend, it’s in your backyard. Well, a traffic congested and crowded version of your back yard, but it’s the closest you’ll get for at least another year. The Yellow Fever will be inflated with fan-boy Aucklanders this week, but will 100% bump up the atmosphere during the 90 minutes. And you might even see some lovely ladies taking their shirts off after the 80 minute mark, providing my inevitable TAB bet pays off.
Tickets ARE only $30, which is a steal compared to watching the Black Caps or most other gigs going down on a Saturday night in the shitty of shails.
The main reason I urge you to go is because these guys deserve it. They’re on a great run after a tough start, and they’re starting to become properly entertaining. The worst case scenario would be if the Nix did play shyte and got thumped – but your insurance is that you can always ask (yell) at Jeremy Brocoli how long he’s got to go before he’s fully boiled.
The game itself is actually pretty crucial for both teams – a classic 6 pointer. Wellington need the big W here to stay in close proximity of the top 6, Adelaide will move to 4th if they prevail. These 2 teams happen to be playing pretty attractive football at the moment, so I can’t stress how cool this game has the potential to be. Kenny K is back, Big Carlos is back, plus no injuries or suspensions from last week’s side that dominated the first half against Brisbane.
Go on, it’ll be worth the effort. Also, feel free to start off at the Kingslander in Mt Eden for some pre-game ‘warm-up’ – I hear they serve cold beer there? COME ON PHOENIX!
Get your tickets here:
Image: The Sun+
So I was going to entertain the fanatics about the top transfer that every team in the EPL needs. A striker like Diego Costa for Arsenal or a defensive midfielder such as Xabi Alonso for Manchester United. But then I got to Manchester City and I was actually stumped on what this dynamic all round team actually need! I can hear you screaming get off the nut from here, but I have been questioning them all season and they have kept proving me wrong. I started on the front and thought another striker to give them a new dimension maybe? Then I remember this is the team that has scored over 100, yes 100 goals this season and their main talisman, Sergio Aguero, has been out for the last month. The likes of Alvaro Negredo and Edin Dzeko have taken over the reins and have been a big part of the reason why City have run over teams at home and now, after dispatching Spurs 5-1, away from home too. So I thought the midfield could do with some sprucing up, like United’s or Newcastle. Oh wait. David Silva, arguably one of the craftiest players in the league. Yaya Toure, hands down best box to box midfielder in the league combining both the guile of a fox and the strength of a horse. Then there’s Samir Nasri and Jesus Navas who both thrive on pace, flair and their ability to beat players one on one and in tight situations. Oh did I mention James Milner, Fernandinho, Jack Rodwell and Javi Garcia???
I’m starting to think they probably don’t need any midfield reinforcements. To the back we go. Pablo Zabaleta is the most consistent right back in the league. No debate there. He oozes professionalism and never seems to put in a bad performance. Considering Micah Richards, the young English prodigy, has been injured all season, he has done remarkably well. Gael Clichy on the other side (another ex-Arsenal player) is getting on in years but still provides opposition managers with nervous moments as he marauds down the flanks, even though he does struggle to get back at times. Don’t worry though, Aleksandar ‘the king’ Kolarov from Serbia is an able back up with a rocket of a left foot if I’ve ever seen one. In the middle of defence you can’t go past captain fantastic Vincent Kompany. Throwing his body into shots and winning 99% of headers is all in a day’s work for the Belgium rep, who has provided defensive steel and passion that his side has lacked in years gone by. He leads from the back superbly and is the most vocal player on the park, barking orders and letting team mates know when something isn’t up to scratch. Now his partner in the middle is the only small weak link I can see. Martin Demichelis has filled in admirably, but if I was a City fan, I would get nervous anytime he gets near the ball. They do have Natija Nastasic and Joleon ‘The Forehead’ Lescott but they have not been played as regularly. Joe Hart is the last piece of this quite amazing puzzle (nearly Wasgij amazing). After a blip mid season where he was dropped from the first team, he has come back superbly becoming one of the top keepers in the league once again. Who was calling for him to be loaned out a month ago?!
Some people wonder why so called ‘pundits’ have already given the title to City, but if you look at this squad you can understand why. Most, if not all of these players, would make the starting line up of any other team in the league. God half their subs would easily get a gig as well. I hear the critics yelling ‘a team of individuals, will never beat an individual team’ but Manuel Pellegrini has nurtured this team into playing for each other and not just themselves. I would be downright surprised if they don’t win the league and for all to see, it is theirs to lose. Complacency or boredom, depending on how you look at it, is maybe the only reason this team drops any more points this season. I hope they do choke, because it would make me very happy, however if you can’t stop them from scoring, then good luck beating them. The ebb and flow is truly great to watch, and you’d have to be one sour football fan, or a United lover not to agree.
Newcastle are looking to bounce back with a win after a tough week (Getty Images)
The Tyne-Wear derby. Two cities separated by 10 miles and boy do they hate each other. The Toon vs the Black Cats. Generally these matches are cagey affairs with players feeling the pressure of a tight rivalry that has been simmering between households and friends for over a century. The stats for overall results are delicately poised with Newcastle winning 53 times and Sunderland 45, with another 45 draws in between. Nothing beats a derby. We saw the Liverpool v Everton in a Merseyside derby blowout which was a bit of a bummer for us neutrals who wanted to see a high scoring draw with a bit of passion and guts. Aston Villa and West Brom played in the West Midlands derby and played out a stunning 4-3 contest that started at a rapid pace, having 6 goals by halftime! So what can Newcastle and Sunderland produce!? The Toon has lost Johan Cabaye to PSG this week and he has been their midfield general. Knowing the manager (not personally unfortunately) Alan Pardew, he would have seen this coming for months and should have contingency plans in place.
They have a strong enough midfield to deny the likes of Adam Johnson and Jack Colback time and space, but do they have the creative maestro to fill the gap Cabaye left? Without him there they may struggle to unlock a Sunderland team on the rise after a sound 1-0 win over Stoke midweek. Loic Remy has been their go to man up front, but has looked fatigued in recent games having carried the team all season. The likes of the Ameobi brothers should be itching to get on the park and prove their worth in a game of huge magnitude. Sunderland rolls down the highway with 7 points from a possible 9 in the last 3 weeks and are slowly but surely pushing themselves out of relegation. In these big games, I’m a firm believer that recent form, whether shit hot or appalling, will count for nothing. Sure you might feel more confident, but once you are in that cauldron it is a whole different story. St James’ Park used to be feared by everyone and especially you’re cross town rivals. Newcastle needs to get that feeling back into the support if they want to take away 3 crucial points after a tough week.
Prediction
Surely Newcastle will win it being at home and playing a team over 7 places below them? You’d think so. I reckon they’ll go out there and try prove to the critics that losing Cabaye isn’t the end of the world and that they are still a European contender. Sunderland have had a glorious 3 weeks including the Mickey mouse cup semi over United, but a derby victory would feel like icing on the cake. Unfortunately I don’t see it happening. Newcastle 2-1.
What do you do if you have heaps of money and don’t know what to do with it? Buy a new car, grab yourself a yacht, maybe take a trip overseas and treat the whanau. Not these guys. They buy football clubs. Meet Roman Abramovich and Mansour bin Zayed Al Nahyan. Jesus thats a mouthful, get Siri to say that one! Both owners pour millions of dollars into these clubs, hoping for the satisfaction of owning a team that can win trophies and give bragging rights to those involved. With so much to spend (sanctioned by the owner), you cannot help but be impressed by the make-up of these squads. Chelsea’s measly defence against the pure attacking talent of the Man City midfielders and front men. Let the fun begin. Considering Chelsea blasted a ridiculous 39 shots at West Ham midweek and they still couldn’t buy a goal, it makes me wonder if that could be their downfall in this matchup. Scoring goals is obviously crucial. They are not going to get many opportunities against City and considering City score an average nearing 3 goals a game, they may need a few to stay in this match. If the midfield of Oscar and Edin Hazard can create opportunities and get on the end of some attacking plays as well, then they could score a goal early on and then park the bus. Mr Mourinho hates when others do it, but doesn’t mind when his own team does it to sound affect. A la Barcelona CL Semi final in 2012. The old guard of John Terry and Gary Cahill will have their work cut out for them even though Sergio Aguero is most likely going to be out with a hamstring complaint. Looking at the options I’ve stated above, City still has plenty of strike power. A bloody scary amount of strike power. If they can keep Chelsea to a goal, I can see them running away in this fixture based on attacking potential alone. If I was Chelsea I would be hoping Mourinho has planned a tactical masterpiece to outclass the new league frontrunners, or this could turn ugly like many other matches that have been played at the Eithad. A slippery surface will help the Blues, and even a bit of rain/sleet/snow, so start praying you Chelsea fans!
Prediction
With City finally moving to the top of the table, will they ever be usurped?? These games can be won on the smallest error or more often than not on a piece of individual brilliance. If we’re going on that, then how can you go past City? City 3-1.
Why is Chelsea even contemplating selling Juan Mata to Manchester United?
So after United spent all summer telling Chelsea they are not willing to do business with an opposing rival, they have made an about turn and just signed Spanish midfielder Juan Mata from Chelsea. If I was Chelsea I would’ve flipped them the bird and told them to take a hike. United wouldn’t even entertain the fact of selling Wayne Rooney in the summer based on the fact that if they sell him to Chelsea it could come back to bite them in the ass in every competition – a la Arsenal selling Robin Van Persie to United last season. With Chelsea not seeing United as the threat they once were and having already played United twice in the league this year, Chelsea may see it as a chance to get a leg up on their main rivals, City and Arsenal.
Is there any player more perfectly suited to the style, history and general pulse of a football team than Luis Suarez is to Liverpool? The buck-toothed bandit. He's the archetypal Liverpool player in every imaginable way. A superb talent matched only by his polarity; beloved and hated in equal measure. Controversy courted at every corner. And the goals. Holy Jesus the goals that this guy scores! Luis Suarez fits this team like a glove – it’s actually hard to imagine him playing for anyone else now. Though it nearly happened…
Flying Kiwis will keep you up to date on the endeavours of New Zealand sports folk overseas. Not the battlers, mind you, but the genuine overlooked and underappreciated superstars that for some ridiculous reason don’t get a look in on local media. Normally we’d cover the most recent week’s games, but having had a little break over the holidays, we figured we’d get you up to speed on the whole season’s worth of games.
This week Christiano Ronaldo was announced player of the year at the Ballon d’or and boy did he deserve it. This guy seriously carries his team on his back whether it’s for country or club. The World cup playoff match against Sweden could have been an absolute disaster for Ronaldo. Imagine no Ronaldo at arguably sporting biggest event? That would have been one of the biggest body blows to the event and even more so to his legacy that he will one day leave behind in the beautiful game. Instead he did what he has done for years. Single handily he destroyed the Swedes scoring all 4 goals across the tie and without doubt, out-duelled Zlatan Ibrahimovich in their much publicised ‘battle of the gods’. The pressure he was under was immense and he calmly put it all behind him and put on a super human display. This to me showed all the characteristics of a legend.
I AM THE MAN
Players have the odd game like Ronaldo throughout their career, but the definition of the very best is someone who can do it when the chips are down and everyone is watching. He does that week in and week out. Seriously the guys a freak and anyone who says he doesn’t deserve it can just look at his amazing record from throughout the year. Whether it is in the Champions League for Madrid or in the spotlight of carrying his national team on his back, this guy has some serious ticker. These days in sports we are quick to forget great feats that athletes have put on show at any one time in their career, however we are even quicker to remind athletes on a regular basis if they have ‘chocked’ or have had a couple of bad performances. Salute the man. He has just won one of the most prestigious awards in world sport. We must celebrate the successes of these individuals regardless of past misdemeanours. He will sleep peacefully knowing no one can take the the 2013 FIFA Ballon d’or award away from him.
After beating Hull convincingly last week and no midweek fixtures to disrupt their preparation, Chelsea head in to this grudge match full of confidence.5 wins in their last 6 games has them pushing Arsenal for top of the league amid their constant fight for EPL glory. Chelsea have managed this run of winning games on the back of a much more disciplined defence shown by 4 clean sheets recently in the league. Although there have been some changes in their defensive line up, the stalwart pairing of Gray Cahill and John Terry are the experienced duo keeping the team together. They may not be the fastest defenders but they make up for it in their positioning, and at times in their aerial threats from corners. The Blues definitely throw their bodies around the most out of any team and are not surprisingly leading the lead in blocks. They will once again need to be committed to the cause, as young guns Danny Welbeck and Adnan Januzaj will be trying their best to make the old legs of the Chelsea defence do some long yards. If they can keep a clean sheet you can be sure that the likes of Eden Hazard and Oscar will have more than fair share of chances to give Chelsea the 3 points.
Ooooh Shinji Kagaaawaaaa
Manchester United finally shook off their losing run by beating Swansea at the Theatre of Dreams. This would have taken a hell of a lot of pressure off both David Moyes and the team, who have been copping it over the last month.This will be a stern test for the Red army though as they haven’t beaten the Blues since back in 2012, which was a fair while ago! In saying that it could be what United need. A game where they are not expected to win and thus all the pressure will be off the away side and put on the shoulders of the in form home team. The midfield battle will be crucial for United, so the likes of Tom Cleverly and Darren Fletcher will have to be on song in tracking the midfield runners that love to get forward for the Blues. I would love to see Shinji Kagawa stay in the number 10 role as I still believe he has a lot to offer, even though he has shown little in the way of form so far this season. His ability to pick a pass going forwards is crucial for their attack to flow and it all can’t be put on young Januzaj’s 18 year old shoulders.
Can the young strike force of the Red army brake down the old guard of the Blue brigade? Whoever wins that battle will take out the match in my opinion.
At Stamford Bridge I can’t see Chelsea giving up anything cheap in this match and we all know Chelsea love to get the goods over United. Chelsea 2-0.
Sunderland vs Southampton –Draw
Arsenal vs Fulham – Arsenal
Crystal Palace vs Stoke City – Draw
Man City vs Cardiff City – Man City
Norwich vs Hull City – Norwich
West Ham vs Newcastle – Newcastle
Livepool vs Aston Villa – Liverpool
Swansea vs Tottenham – Draw
West Brom vs Everton – West Brom
But that was then. Since that painful defeat to Central Coast on December 19th, something transformed. Something within that squad of battlers screamed ‘ENOUGH IS ENOUGH!’ and then good ol’ Manny Muscat whipped out his boom box and blasted ‘We’re Not Gonna Take it’ on repeat.
Since that fateful night, the Nix have crusaded to 10 points from 4 games. 3 wins on the trot can be credited to some awesome spikes of form, a bit of luck, but 99% perseverance. Ernie Merrick has been brave enough to stick to the same positive game plan all season, and it’s finally paying off.
While it’s definitely been a team effort, a few individuals have really started to make their mark;
Steinbags Huysegems – 4 goals in 4 games. You can’t argue with that, the man’s been in the right place at the right time & looks shit tonnes more threatening than when Jeremey Brocoli is on the ball (Sorry Jerry, I know you’re out of form, but we’re just having a laugh mate). Yeah, he’s still slower than a wet week, but he’s got a great big mug & his name sounds great when the commentators yell it as he’s slotting home, so it’s all gravy baby.
Albert Reira – isn’t this guy meant to be on holiday? Aren’t his family wondering where he is? “Oh yeah hey Mum, I just got caught up with playing some professional football, I should be home after my brand spankin new contract expires.” But in all seriousness, this guy has come from playing backyard football in Spain, to being the anchor of our midfield. He wins the ball, passes well, and is rarely caught out of position. What a champ, hope you’re enjoying the holiday, mate!
Andrew Durante – Ok so he had an average start to the season, but who didn’t? He copped a lot of shit during New Zealand’s loss to Mexico, “He’s a bloody useless Aussie! He’s a witch! Burn him!” and so on. But this guy is a classy A-League player. He doesn’t need to be anything more than that. He’s like Kevin Nolan to the EPL. In the last few weeks, Durante hasn’t made a mistake, and has been throwing himself in front of every shot heading towards his goal. While he’s more of a ‘behind the scenes’ man, his leadership has been key. And how about that beard!
And last but probably most, Glen Moss. Man, this guy is insane. I shit you not, he must make at least 3 top class saves per game. Yeah, he gave away a penalty (unconverted) in the latest draw against Central Coast, but he has definitely been player of the year thus far. No one’s put a Glen Moss highlights video up on YouTube yet, but seriously… someone should. But not me, I’m a busy man.
In other news, we won’t be seeing Paul ‘Jesus Christ, the saviour, the Holy One’ Ifill again this season, he’s buggered his ankle. And that sucks, because he is the man and the crowd (and myself) love him to bits. But never fear, Ernie’s brought in Auckland City front man Roy Krishna. Now, I don’t know a heck of a lot about this guy – but I grew up playing against plenty of naturally skilled Fijians, and I’m really excited to see how he fairs in the next step up. He was given 10 minutes against Central Coast without really seeing too much ball. Merrick’s signed this bloke for a reason, and since Brockie’s waaaaaay out of form, maybe Krishna deserves a chance in the deep end. The word around town is that a chance with the Phoenix has been on the cards for a while now, so good on him.
The Nix host Melbourne on Saturday night at the Cake Tin, a team they’ve only beaten twice in 19 meetings. However, those 2 victories did come at home. With the form they’re in, I’m quietly confident, even if Melbourne are sitting in 3rd spot.
Come on lads, we’re now only 5 points off the top 6! Let’s get into it!
Wellington Phoenix Last 4 results:
ROUND 11
Phoenix 1, Sydney FC 0 @ Westpac Stadium
Stein the Brain 32’
ROUND 12
Heart 0, Phoenix 1 @ AAMI Park
Stein the Brain 74’
ROUND 13
Wanderers 1, Phoenix 3 @ Pirtek Stadium
Stein the Brain 77’, 82’
Tyler Boyd 66’
ROUND 14
Phoenix 1, Central Coast 1 @ Westpac Stadium
Kenny Cunningham 45’
